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I have a hatred for my father...

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All of my life.. I've been trying to understand him but it seems that he brings me disappointment in life rather than someone I can look up to. We have literally nothing in common so it's hard for me to talk to him. He never seems interested in anything I have to say or anything moves him. He always got something negative to say or criticize me about since I was little. That really boils me up sometimes. I don't think there's ever a time we've really bonded as father & son.Most of my time I try to spend alot of time avoiding him. It's just awkward around him.. He doesn't know what to say to me. He'll point out something stupid whenever we're out. I don't know what to say to him because he takes things people say & twist them around into meaning something bad! He just so negative about everything also.


In all he basically annoys me, he brings up stuff & he doesn't take my feelings into consideration.Like tonight, he really just p*ssed me off. I am already in a depressed funk as it is. I come back from the movies with a friend.My mother asks me for some towells. Ok, I thought she said a Towell. So I come back with one & my mother said she wanted some more. He comes out of no where & makes this big deal, saying that I can't Differentiate between towells. So what I made a mistake BIG FREAKIN DEAL! Now later on.. I come to find out he taped a football game over one of my videotapes that I keep classic episodes of shows on. The thing about it is he knew it was my tape. He said that I have so many tapes that going over one of them won't hurt me!We have plenty of blanks!! I wish he'd consult with me before he does that! I know the towell or the tape issue seems like very small petty things but he's just ugh.


My overall thing is, I hate my father. It's not healthy or good for me to feel this way but it's how I feel.The thing is, he can do or say some of the smallest things to just get my blood pressure going! I've tried to love my father but he makes it so hard. I understand this is who he is, but I gotta find ways to get this hatred out of my system..

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Hello, it's likely your dad has problems, issues he never sorted, they are not necessarily related to you, maybe he just thinks it's easier to take it out with a person who won't really fight back.


You cannot solve things for him, all you can do is not take things personally, of course, we're talking about your father but you must distance yourself from negativity, you can discover one day that flaws and all you love him but there has to be acceptance of many things, like him not being the father you wish for or him possibly never changing, but always keeping in mind such things are not your fault.


Nobody is perfect, not even our parents, some of them are full of flaws but it's what was given to us, maybe their mistakes are for us to learn from so we don't do the same.


Remain calm when around your father, don't get caught up in a circle of anger, he can be as frustrated as he wants but you can be okay.

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  • 2 months later...

I've basically got the same problem. I'm really into bowling and golf. So whenever i bowl really well or golf good, my boyfriend always ends up telling him and he always replies with "oh thats all". Even when he comes to watch me bowl, and i'm not doing so good, he says "geez, you suck" and it just makes me so mad.

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