Possible reconciliation ahead?

[roxy79]

My ex broke up with me July 04. We still hung out with each other till Feb. 05 until he realized what he was doing to me (giving me false hope) and he started avoiding me and we basically have not talked since then. (Almost a year).We do see each other on a daily basis as he works right next to my building. I have since moved on, have a had a boyfriend or two and haven't really thought of him or getting back together at all. he on the other hand has not had a girlfriend.

 

My good friend dates my ex's roommate. I talked to her the other day and she said "so and so asked me what your deal was." I didn't understand what she meant by it so i questioned her futher. Apparently, my ex has noticed that I don't look at him, say hi, wave, nod or anything to him. He says "she just looks down at the ground or straight ahead when she walks by and never acknowledges me. What's her deal?"

 

She told him, well maybe she's just avoiding you cause that's how you kinda left things...you avoiding her. But my friend told me "just make sure next time you see him you say hi or wave or something." She repeated that twice thru-out our discussion.

 

My question: It's been almost a year since he and I had physical contact with each other, like dinner etc. I'm wondering.... do you think since he is asking questions about me that maybe he is pondering the idea of trying to re-establish contact with me and maybe see if the spark is still there? Cause I wouldn't think a guy would ask questions about his ex unless he still cared.

 

any thoughts?

[roxy79]

Oh also... my friend said "sometimes guys just need a greenlight." I took that as maybe he had mentioned wanting to get together with me but isn't sure how I feel about HIM. I guess a guy doesn't want to seek something out if he already knows he's going to get rejected right?

[NJRon]

People usually have some sort of feelings for their ex. Sounds like you guys started a good friendship and it just, for whatever reason, died. However, just because people have feelings for their ex's, doesn't mean they want to get back together.

 

Try not to read too much into this. If you want to pursue something, even a friendship, then just try acting normal with him and go with the flow, but don't expect anything... that's just setting yourself up.

[roxy79]

We did have a good relationship. He ended it cause he felt like he needed to do things for himself for once and he felt like he's been "stuck" under a rock for so many years....(I was his first girlfriend in about 4 years...his gf before me called off their engagment).

 

I guess I would feel differently had he been dating someone else or had a girlfriend since we broke up, but he hasn't. He had orginally told me, if I wanted to wait for him, I could...but he said that best thing for me would be to move on. So I can't help but think that maybe he's ready to "try again" and that he's at the point in his life where he "thinks" he can handle a relationship now.

 

Am I just wishfuly thinking right now?

[NJRon]

Unfortunately only time will tell. It's your decision how much time that is, as that's the only thing in your control. I would think about setting an actual date that you are comfortable waiting, not telling him about it. When that time comes, if he hasn't returned, then move on. Just a thought. You can't just put your life on hold.

[roxy79]

I haven't "waited" for him as I have been dating and seeing other people. Just at this time in MY life, I'm not seeing anyone and I was just caught a little off guard by the information that was presented to me by my friend the other night.