A young broken heart in need of help!

[time2moveon]

Well my boyfriend of 1 1/2 years just broke up with me 4 days ago. And many of you may have read my last posts as to what happened, and you may need to read the past two for info on what is going om.

 

Well for those of you who know what im going through, here is some stuff. These >>> ** are going to be like...bullets you could say!

 

** Well, im still having a hard time going into my room. Iv been getting my own mother to get shirts out for me, ones that she had gotten me or some that had nothing to do to relate to him (im 16 so...cut me some slack, i love and respect my mom, you should too ). Iv been sleeping on my living room couch just, kinda like a step in healing for me.

 

** Weve also had a thing bouncing back an fourth about a friend of mine at school, has a cousin here at my school too, that has a twin brother at my ex boyfriends school (lost? he he). So there has been a rumor floating around that I was saying I wanted to have sex with my friends cousin here at school. In which I never said. I told my ex that I might of said I wanted to have sex with his car (a joke!!! GAH! he he) because I drive a honda civic and so does he but he has a hatchback and i thought it was a cute car, and yeah... that could of been miss interpretated by maybe me wanting to have sex with him...but that was never said. Anywho, my mother and I were on our way to the library to find some books to relieve my stress and find a good yoga video. He called right when I pulled into the parking lot. I hope i cleared things up with him. He actually had called me during school on my moms cell and asked for me, but, I was at school. But when he did call me at the library he had heard that I wasnt eating and was concerned. Im also very curious as to, if he is actually keeping his word on trying to help himself loose of all the stress.

 

** My eating is getting much better. I went to get protien drinks last night to help me gain weight and just have a liquid to get me back on track of eating.

 

** Iv also contacted one of my ex's teachers at school that he is close too and was talking to him about our situation. He hasnt said much but he said he would get back to me. I also contacted one of his brothers, band members, wives to help me out. Shes really sweet and I knew could possibly help me with what I was going through.

 

** This is going to be my first weekend without him and my mother and I are planning on going to see some of our good friends in Northern Georgia. hes going to spend time with one of his friends, which happens to be a girl, so im def. in a source of discomfort...ugh, he may not be going there to hook up with anyone, its just the fact of...ITS A FEMALE!!!!

 

** I am having many feelings as to wanting to get him back. Like I said, he has alot of baggage to deal with, a boy under alot of stress I tell ya, and I worry about him and I like to be there to help him. Yes yes, I know since he left me and I shouldent be worrying about him but myself, im still concerned for the boy, hes a good guy but just I think lost in his life as to how to deal with the crap he is dealing with. Yes, I am helping myself as iv previously said, going out of town, yoga, and counselors!

 

** I am still struggling! I miss miss his really pretty eyes and his laugh, smile, and no matter how stupid or the dumb things I did he wouldent laugh at me but def. with me (for instance, he was chaceing me around his house a few months ago and I ran into his bathroom and shut the door and slipped on the wet marble floor and fell right on my butt and hit my head. He came in to see if I was okay and I was in pain but he couldent stop laughing and I loved to see that smile of his.) I dont think I would be really struggleing with my problems if he wasnt so close and im worried about his health. He HASNT been rude much at all. hes juggled my heart a bit by playing games with it, testing my emotions, but other than that, hes been good.

 

** Though I am still eating and getting back on track people are still asking me at school, "Are you okay!? You look awful!" and its just im under alot of stress and trying to cope with the fact my lover is gone. There have been alot of people supporting me and hugging me and making me feel cared for in which I greatly respect.

 

** One reason I have been sleeping in my living room was that was the place we spent the less time in. Even in my bathroom, just looking at some of my earrings I think "he liked those and my toothbrush "he used that " and even my poor cat!, my cat reminds me of him because he was always around us and was kinda like our child, and my cats are normally my support, but MY cat (1 out of the 6 we own! ) twiggy is my little baby!

 

** I am hoping like everyone said, since im the dumpee, I will be stronger than him.

 

** One thing im going to miss, is when him and I were out together, him and I did the most outrageous things that were so much fun! For instance, one of my fav moments with him was the Vans Warped Tour. the Dropkick Murphys were going to be playing soon. So we stood in the hot sun with sweaty, gross, and nasty people for 3 diffrent bands before them. Normally after a band has played people leave around the concert area to get air so everytime a band was over we got closer to the front of the stage. When DKM finally came on, him, my good friend chelsea, and I were up front. When the last song played, they allowed people to get on stage. Him and I were some of the very lucky few who got on stage with a great band. I looked out and saw all those people, THOUSANDS, and he was right there beside me having a kick butt time with me. After it was over, I hugged him and was so excited and told him "That was sooo much fun!!! OH WOW! I LOVED IT!" and we were both excited. Imma miss those fun times with him...

 

 

** None the less, I want this boy back and yes, he did break up with me but I have high hopes in us getting back together sometime. He has done way too much for me and has spent alot of his time on me and I believe that I should have repaied him sooner. Hes been struggling with all this stress and I am wanting to know, possibly hints to help me get him back. Maybe things I should tell him or I should do to make him realize that im here for him and I want to possibly have the fun times back.

 

Please help yall! Id greatly appreciate it!

[lunatic]

I am glad to hear your getting a little better because a little progress is still much more acceptable than no progress. So I am happy your keeping busy and trying to take care of you. The pain will take time to get to the point that you can function again over time. I hope you don't stick to the hopes that he will be back because you have to start moving on. Do not hold up your life because your waiting for him to come back. You are old enough to know that the possibility is he will not come back. So keep an open mind about the relationship and start protecting your feelings now.

 

It is good to see you making positive moves in the right direction. Keep up holding strong and keep posting here when you are feeling weak.

(((BIG HUGS TO YOU!)))

 

1 out of the 6 we own!

Holy cow you have six cats? OMG that's a lot of felines running around your home. OMG I have one dog and that is enough for me because he is always into something like a three year old. I cannot imagine what six cats are like!!

[arwen]

Girl, when I read you are 16 I was so surprised... it seems that even age does not matter in the matters of the heart, I had my first broken heart at 22 and I remember it JUST the same as you describe it.

 

You should cut yourself some slack, you are doing very well, you seem so very mature in living these steps in your progress of healing so consciously. I think you will grow a lot from this bad experience, and be a strong woman!

 

Of course you miss him, this is something that will stay. But I promise you, there will be this day that you have this light moment of realizing that you didn't think about him for an hour straight. Or that you wake up feeling happy for no particular reason. And you will come here and share that moment of course

 

For now, keep up the good work and let your mother take care of you... You know, when I had that heartbreak I was already living on my own, but I went home in the weekend... I couldn't even travel myself, my parents came to pick me up and they had to feed me because I hadn't swallowed a decent bite in days... it gets better!!!

 

Take care,

 

ilse

[Relationship Coach]

T2MO,

 

This painful process in which you are experiencing pretty much happens to everyone sooner or later in life. Of course at 16 and being in high school where everyone knows your business can intensify everything making it worse. First of all, you are only four days into this and you must realize that many relationships have these little break ups from time to time. It is not the end of the world and you must not allow this to dominate and diminish your physical and mental health. No one here can say for certain whether he will come back to you or not but the important thing is you have to stay healthy whether he does or doesn't come back.

 

I understand the pain that symbolism can cause, it puts you in to a recall mode and it runs away like a freight train. You need to face your anxiety and pain head on, take control of it. Re-arrange your room, paint it, do whatever it takes to make it represent the "new you". DON'T try this with your kitty, they tend to lick the paint off! The one thing you can control is you, how you handle things, how you overcome things and how you learn about whom you are during these painful times will help define who you are. It's very good that you are getting back to eating and focusing on self help materials and yoga.

 

As far as your trip to Northern Georgia goes, have fun and think about you, not him! I know that's easy to say and hard to do but you need to take a time out from everything you have been going through. Find solace in the fact that you can be happy and function normally when you focus on you. You have to love yourself first. Good Luck and Best Wishes.

 

RC

[time2moveon]

Ha ha you guys are awesome! Everything each one of you has made me feel DEF better and also made me laugh. Its good to laugh! Yes!