Everyone deals with it in their own way?

[locolady]

Hello, i'm in need of some opinion - i recently broke up with my boyfriend of 4 years - he drunkenly pulled another girl so i felt i had no choice but to end the relationship despite loving him very much - we've had jealousy issues in the past. Its absolutely killing me, i've spent hours crying, despairing - etc etc - i know that the people on here fully understand the pain of a break-up especially when its coupled with the agony of being cheated on.

 

My problem is that he just doesnt seem to care. When it first happened, he sobbed and said he'd do anything to make it up to me but very quickly he changed his mind and said that he just couldnt see us ever working together again. He has now started university so is understandably having a great time, making lots of new friends and going out all the time - i guess i am jealous of this as i finished university and am at home with parents again in a boring place and most of my friends dont live here at the moment. I know circumstances have made the break-up easier for him plus he cheated so i cant have meant the same to him as he did to me. Basically, how do you cope with feeling so insignificant? He says he's just more able to put it to the back of his mind but i'm so overwhelmed with my sadness. Do you think this means i just never meant anything to him? Any advice as to how to stop focusing on how good his life is would be appreciated.

[newts]

Hi Loco,

 

That's a really horrible situation you are in. I think that when you spent that much time with someone you were never insignificant to him - you can never forget time you have shared with anybody that has had a huge emotional part in your life. Maybe he is just not mature enough to be in a serious relationship at the moment. Its not an excuse, however, uni is a hell of a lot of fun and you just get caught up in it.

 

You have done the right thing, he cheated on you and that is unacceptable in any relationship unless it is discuss and agreed on by both parties ( this I find is very rare).

 

You need to let go, do things for yourself ad find someone who has the same morals as you.