lovemetender Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 Why do guys throw girls away like they're yesterdays trash?! I don't think I will EVER understand... Honestly, what runs through a males head when they play such games? I don't understand how our brains can be so different, how our mind set can be so different? Can someone please help me to better understand?? I know there are good guys out there, but im 22 years old and HAVE NOT experienced one!! Link to comment
yeawutever Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 Not all of them are like that. Some are losers while others are very serious and do care about you. Link to comment
Derek Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 Perhaps guys do feel the same as girls, but our way of coping is to "cut it out of our minds" to compartmentalize it away and forget about it. Probably not a very healthy way to do it in a way. I hear guys can often feel things more than you think but they been conditioned since birth to never tell anyone or they might seem weak and dependent. It's worse for a guy to be seen as weak, so they force themselves to not feel anything. They never tell anyone. P.S. That same "compartmentalizing" ability is what makes some guys good at emotionless decisions under pressure. (like being a soldier, fireman, police etc.) Link to comment
DN Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 When the same things keep happening to you, sometimes you have to look within yourself to find the reason. Are you attracted to the wrong guys? Do you not hive the 'good guys' a chance? Are you doing something when in a relationship that drives them away? Perhaps some self-analysis is in order here. BTW - same sort of thing happens to men. Link to comment
musicguy Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 I'm a good guy and at 26 I've always been tossed aside because I'm "too nice" or "too good enough" for a girl...but not all guys are jerks. Link to comment
Meow18 Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 Since you have been getting involved in the wrong guys, think about what they all have in common. How do they act? If you meet a guy and he's showing these signs, then don't get involved with him. The biggest mistake girls make is thinking guys will change just for them. Jerky guys aren't going to change just because they see a beautiful girl. Of course some do, but obviously it's not worth waiting to find out. Some signs I would look for are: The guy doesn't seem very interesting in getting to know you. The guy talks a lot about having sex and making out with girls (maybe not just talking about doing it with you, but also other girls in general). Um.. there are just so many signs to look for and fortunantly (but I guess unfortunantly) you have experience with jerky guys so you can realize the signs better. I don't know that it's fair to hate the male gender. Maybe just hate the jerky guys, but girls can be just the same at times. Like you said, there are good guys out there. Maybe you are just looking in the wrong places? Link to comment
Relationship Coach Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 LMT, If you don't like getting splashed, stay away from the kiddie pool! You keep putting yourself in these positions, you are too desperate to find someone. Slow down, you keep making mistakes because you feel you need to be in a relationship. You want someone to like you for who you are but first you have to like who you are. Impress someone with the truth not a lie. My wife loves me for who I am, not for what my mother has accomplished in life. You say that guys play games and their mind set is different than girls, then why would you lie about your mom? Is that not a form of playing a game? Another thing, guys can read, see, smell, taste and feel desperation and the wrong guys will exploit it and take advantage of you. They know just what to say to get what they want, just like you. You wanted to impress that one guy so you lied to impress him and it worked, only until he said he was coming to town and wanted to meet your mom. Remember, when you point a finger at someone, there are three pointing back at you! Have you stopped to think you are the source of your own problems and frustrations? You are 22 years old, let love find you. RC Link to comment
healinginnyc81 Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 lovemetender, I've always had a hard time with dating because I've always been seen as the "nice guy." My only long term relationship was three years, and I feel that I'm in the same position as you except I'm a guy and I feel like my gf just threw me away for another guy who's more cocky and seems like an a$$hole to me. It may be true that more guys do it, I don't know. But in any case, I want to believe that I can learn from this and see what was wrong with her, me or our relationship and make my next long term relationship better. Link to comment
friscodj Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 I'm a good guy and at 26 I've always been tossed aside because I'm "too nice" or "too good enough" for a girl...but not all guys are jerks. Me too, brother, to say I can feel you is a huge understatement. Our time will come...don't change... Link to comment
photomo Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 I'm a good guy and at 26 I've always been tossed aside because I'm "too nice" or "too good enough" for a girl...but not all guys are jerks. Same here...I've always been honest, and would never hurt a girl. One day my ex will realise what a good thing she had when she was with me..... Link to comment
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