is it me?

[dogheadma]

I have been seeing this girl for two mos. and we are very strongly attracted to one another. She has this quirk that really bothers me and I was seriously considering breaking it off because of it but just yesterday we had a long talk on the phone and things seemed to get smoothed over somewhat. Here it is: Whenever we spend time together and it comes to the end where we have to part for a little while, I get a vibe from her that she's really, really sad. This sadness just seems to come over her. It really bums me out because we just finished having a really great time together and I was really happy. I get kind of a "push pull" feeling from it. Big bummer. She seems to get very blue and I can't figure out why. It really does bother me and it kind of hurts. I know I'm not imagining it but am I being too sensitive?

[nikkers04]

I think its a good thing that she gets sad!!! I use to cry when ever my guy left.,...of course we were in a long distance relationship when that happeend but it just means she is sad to see you go and doesn't want to lose you in most cases.

[Ms Omaniac]

I agree with nikkers.

be glad she adores your company so much. plus girls are overly emotional sometimes. if it's to the point it's tooooooo much...maybe id start to worry.

but frankly id be more worried if she could care less if you stayed or left.

[dogheadma]

yeah, maybe it is too much. She's been in this funk all week. We've talked on the phone everyday and she's just really bummed. I'm getting a vibe like maybe it's me, like maybe she's over it, but just isn't saying so.

[annie24]

Moods are contagious. When she's down, it makes you down too. When she's happy, that makes you happy also.

 

I don't know what you can do to fix it, apart from telling her that you don't like it that she gets sad when you have to go, because it's not like you're going on a trip or never going to see her again.

 

I wonder if she is afraid of losing you?

[dogheadma]

That would be very ironic, because it feels like I'm being pushed away.

[ComputerGuy]

I dont think it's a pushin away thing at all. I get the same with my best friend whom I like. It's simply because the time I spend with her is so amazingly awesome, I don't want it to ever end and I just want to stay there forever. It's quite the opposite to pushin them away.

[ocrob]

I think you are looking at this the wrong way. If she is happy when she is with you, then she obviously cares about you very much. You can't tell her not to be sad when she leaves you. Those are her feelings and you should be more understanding. When she gets that way, just reassure her how much you care about her and let her know what an amazing time you had with her. Tell her how excited you are to see her next time and encourage her to be excited for the next time and not sad. Sounds like she really cares about you and that is a good thing.

[singingnotflying]

I get sad when my time with my boyfriend ends too, whether on the phone or in person. We live together, but he works a lot, spends time in bars a lot (& I don't always want to tag along because I'm pregnant & those bars are really smokey), has his own interests. I just feel this anxiousness. It may be from past experience with other people in relationships. I have nothing to worry about with him. Can't help it, even though I think it causes him some grief like it seems to cause you with this girl you're talking about. Guess I'm a little lonely & bored. And I just miss him. He's my best friend after all.

[Confessoress]

I had to check the date of this thread, because I seriously thought "CRAP! Is that my BF?" LMAO!

 

I am exactly the same before my BF is about to leave (long distance relationship). We've had such a wonderful time and I'm really sad it's going to end and I won't see him for God knows how long. My BF acted exactly the same way you did he said something like "You always cry on the last day, it's kinda freaky. I thought we had a really good time..." And I was like it's because I care about you, that we DID have a good time and I'm going to miss you numbnuts! I was even thinking he didn't care that much because he wasn't upset too! Doh.

 

P.S - You're not my BF are you? LOL

[dogheadma]

Ha haa No, it's not me! I can understand you feeling that way in ldr but we live 15 min. away from each other. Anyway, this sheds a whole new light on the issue for me. It does bum me out that she gets sad but maybe I am looking at it the wrong way. She makes me happy even when she's not around and I would think she would feel the same way but I guess maybe that's just not her way. It still bums me out but I think I can see it differently now. I'll try to be more understanding about it. Thanks all!

[Ryan0407]

I think it's nothing to worry about actually. Like what nikkers said, you should feel happy that she gets sad when you leave! As long as shes happy when shes with you, thats all you gotta care about, and you should feel flattered that she gets that way when you leave. It seems that she really loves yah.