Can't fight the urge

[rosstheboss]

I broke up with my gf on Sunday under pretty good circumstances and we vowed to remain friends. I know for this to work we need space away from each other but I have this problem.

I can't help but look at her blog, myspace and website etc. I want to see if she was written anything about the breakup but I know I shouldn't and won't be able to handle it. I have blocked all the sites in my work's firewall and at home but the urge to unblock them and read them is killing me!!

I try to divert my attention when I feel it but it's getting harder, any tips on blocking/ignoring the urges?

 

Thanks

[RayKay]

Usually the "urge" will pass if you can just get through the first few minutes or so.

 

I would find a new way to distract you, so anytime you think of looking, you automatically decide to walk and go get a coffee or visit a coworker instead, or make some business calls for example. If you can get through that initial URGE, it should lapse and die down. And then you will feel good about yourself for getting through it! Much better then if you had looked.

 

Over time the urges will be less and less.

 

It takes time, but you have to retrain your brain basically.

[Hope75]

Every time you have the urge, get on here and talk about it-- chances are someone will be around to talk you out of it.

 

Remember... you broke up with her for a reason....try to remember that reason and how looking at her blog and myspace account isn't going to helo you in the long run.

 

Remember what curiosity did to the cat.

[rosstheboss]

argh I just read a message she posted on a forum I didnt know she was even on! it was an advert for a local band's show/gig and she replied simply saying she'll be there. now i feel bad for some reason and i'm dying to check out her myspace!!

god i hate this

[Hope75]

Don't do it Ross....

 

Remember that you broke up with her, and why, and that by breakin up you explicitely gave up rights to a stake in her life.... which means that spying on her, following her activities and showing up where she is, is unfair and off limits.

 

Keep yourself busy and don't do it.