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ive kissed girls and boys, but to get turned on, i have to think of 2 girls together. ive never had a gf, and ive had 2 bfs. but i never feel comletley comfortable with having one. i dunno if its because its a boy, or if its because im just scared of commitment...the point here is...how am i suppose to know if im really gay or bi? and if i am, how do i accept it? and no offence...but that whole "think of how u feel" thing doesnt work for me because i DONT know how i feel, thats why im asking for help. thank u

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How old are you?


I know you're going through a difficult process, I've been there. It's taken me 30 years to discover my true sexuality!


I've had two marriages. The first 5 years and this one 14 years (divorce ends 16th February). I'm engaged to a wonderful woman (long story! If you want to see what I've been going through read 'It's Torture' -Emotions and Feelings Forum). Please don't do what I did and push the thoughts to the back of your mind because they come out later and torment you!


The only advice I can give you is go out with both sexes and see how you feel.


Feel free to PM me anytime. I'm also on MSN, just ask for my address.

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I agree.


If you're not certain than go out there and see for yourself. No one can tell you what your sexuality is. If you're uncertain you have to experience to realize if you're comfortable with something.


Alot of people experience ambiguous feelings when it comes to their sexuality.


I hope you figure things out

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Many people question their sexuality and it takes years for them to really know what they want. It can be frustrating and confusing. I think that eventually there comes a point where you do just know. If you find yourself not into any guy but regularly attracted to girls, you'll be able to see you are gay. However, coming to terms with it might be something different. There is still a lot of fears and issues that comes along with it, people who don't accept it. The important thing is to follow your heart and take as much time as you need to decide for yourself. There's no rush and no reason to feel worried. Take your time and do what is right for you.


From the sound of things though, you seem to be leaning to being gay. You are finding females attractive while males aren't really doing anything for you.

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but to get turned on, i have to think of 2 girls together.

Well, this does put you at a slight disadvantage when it comes to heterosexual relationships.


but i never feel comletley comfortable with having one.i dunno if its because its a boy, or if its because im just scared of commitment

Not being comfortable, in what context? I personally feel beyond the attraction this may be the root of the question at hand, or at least root of the answer afterwards.


It truly depends on several factors. One is your age, how you feel about males in general in comparison to women, especially on that commitment and comofort statement which seems like a huge point to me.


You've said about only being aroused by women, that in itself makes a large statement. Yet as I'll always say, if you're in the younger teens, hormones are just out and about and can fog the judgements. Even though I personally was attracted to women in my teens, I pushed it away until the hormones had a cool down to insure that it wasn't just the teen phase of tackle anything with legs as some of us have to an extent.


I'm just making this statement because it may be too early to make a clear orientation judgement and one fatal step may be deciding your homosexual but to later think, "Huh, it was just a phase afterall. No interest. Oops. This ought to be interesting explain to the family, change of heart, er hormones."

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