ex said he wants me back....ball in my court

[littlelaxer]

My ex and i broke up over a year and a half ago. its been nothing but a crazy mess with since. through out the whole time he never would completely go away. his reasons for breakin up were that he was to young...didnt know what he wanted. so i let him go. i never called him he called me. i told him often to leave me a lone but somehting would come up and we would get in contact.

 

a couple months ago he told me he still loved me but still didnt know what he wanted completely. so i wrote him a note telling him i cared about him very much but i couldnt take it anymore and that he is to leave me alone. he got mad and he did. during this i have had a new bf for about 3 months now.

 

last night was my 21st bday and the first time i have ever drank. i thought it was a good idea to call him. he was out drinkin too. we talked for awhile i rememeber everything. he was like i want to see u i said no. i got off the phone and it was back and forth all night. today i woke up and i had a voicemail from him saying for me to call him back.

 

i called him and he told me he had been on the phoen all morning talkin about me to his friends on what he should do....

 

as it turns out he says he wants me back. he misses me and he made a mistake he says. and hes leaving the ball in my court to decide what i want. i told him i dont know i have a bf. i said i just dont know. i said its not going to take 1 phone call its gonna take mroe then that. how do i know ur not going to change ur mind in a week or so. he said im gonna keep trying. he called me later this afternoon too tellin me what he was doing. i dont know what to think really.

 

its been such a long time and i do care about him i just dont know

[octopus]

yeah, he's gotta do more than a phone call for sure. he either begs, or you go on with you new bf. but lucky you - a dream for most of us here has come true for you!

[karen95]

i think that you really do need to think this over. how deep are your feelings for your new boyf. and you should tell your ex to prove to you that he has changed and that he won't up and leave again. could you try being friends with him and seeing does it progress into a relationship?

[DN]

I have to say that, although I understand your dilemma, I really feel sorry for you your current boyfriend. He's either going to get his heart broken (just like you did) or he has a girlfriend who is at least thinking about dumping him.

 

He would be yet another person proving that it is never wise to be involved with someone not properly over their ex.

 

Try not to hurt him any more than you have to.

[littlelaxer]

i really just think i am confused. ive wanted this for sooo long. and now i have a bf. yes we have had recent problems and that is not gonna make me break up with him......

 

i guess really deep down i wonder if the ex is honest.

 

 

im not going to do anything. i really care about the guy im dating now but it just messes me up that the ex said all this. wouldnt it to you? im just gonna continue with the new bf see what happens with him tryin to not let the ex mess things up. if the ex really wants something he can try and see what happens....right?

[DN]

Or you could just tell him that you have a new boyfriend whom you really like and you don't want him to call again.

[lady00]

if the ex really wants something he can try and see what happens....right?

 

I disagree. I don't think its wise to just leave it up to chance or up to your ex. You need to decide what you want and stick to it. If you want your current bf then tell the ex to stop trying to get you back. Don't be wishy-washy about it because other people's feelings are involved and you need to be careful about that.

[spaulding18]

Your story actually hits home a bit. I was the boyfriend of 3 months when my ex's ex came back. It sucked to know that they were still talking, I actually thought it was disrespectful (my biased opinion). My opinion of the situation is to step aside and think about what you really want. Don't keep both around just to have someone. Be fair to yourself and you'll end up making the right move for all three of you.