Liam15 Posted January 6, 2006 Share Posted January 6, 2006 Hi, I'm 15 and me and my girlfriend have been going out for about 2 months. We have only kissed a couple of times, and they were just little "pecks" at a school dance. I think we're both a little shy, but I know she wants to (and so do I!) but I'm just scared, the problem is, I don't even really know what I'm scared of! What I'm asking is if anyone has any good advice on things like: kiss length (i'm hoping to get a little longer than a few seconds), type of kiss, and how I should get started. We'll most likely be sitting on a couch watching tv or a movie or something. Thanks so much! Also, any replies before later tonight would really help Link to comment
Derek Posted January 6, 2006 Share Posted January 6, 2006 I wonder that over time you add little techniques to your repertoire. It's kinda like playing a musical instrument. How about you add the "cup her head/neck in your hand(s)" technique to your repertoire. Thumbs softly on the cheeks. I am sure others will have more. =) Link to comment
RayKay Posted January 6, 2006 Share Posted January 6, 2006 Hi, I'm 15 and me and my girlfriend have been going out for about 2 months. We have only kissed a couple of times, and they were just little "pecks" at a school dance. I think we're both a little shy, but I know she wants to (and so do I!) but I'm just scared, the problem is, I don't even really know what I'm scared of! What I'm asking is if anyone has any good advice on things like: kiss length (i'm hoping to get a little longer than a few seconds), type of kiss, and how I should get started. We'll most likely be sitting on a couch watching tv or a movie or something. Thanks so much! Also, any replies before later tonight would really help Lean into her, look at her, maybe hold her chin, side of her face lightly with your fingers to bring her in a bit, and start the kiss as you would a peck, but hold a little longer. Be confident, I know it's hard when you are shy, but just fake it until you feel it Part your lips a bit, and see if she responds by doing similar. Nibble a bit on the lips (don't actually BITE though at this stage at least!). Play lightly with your lips/her lips and your tongue. Just don't ram it in, just be delicate, light, for now. It will flow pretty well, I know that's little consolation, but just enjoy it, and you'll know what to do (when to stop.....just give enough it's exciting, but stop early enough to leave her wanting more!). Really, the hardest part is just starting it, from there it will feel QUITE natural! Link to comment
Liam15 Posted January 6, 2006 Author Share Posted January 6, 2006 Thanks for the responses (Nice to see fellow Canadians I have another question though, how should I kind of start it, should I put my arm around her and see if she sort of leans into it? Link to comment
RayKay Posted January 6, 2006 Share Posted January 6, 2006 Thanks for the responses (Nice to see fellow Canadians I have another question though, how should I kind of start it, should I put my arm around her and see if she sort of leans into it? Sure, I would....just make her feel comfortable and you as well! Link to comment
Derek Posted January 6, 2006 Share Posted January 6, 2006 hmm, how to start it? How about "ya wanna make out?" ROFL! that works for some girls I remember saying lightheartedly, with a sly smile, "ya wanna snuggle?" to a girl and she laughed and said sure. =) All too easy. But listen to RayKay, don't listen to me, she knows what's up. =) Link to comment
Relationship Coach Posted January 6, 2006 Share Posted January 6, 2006 RAYKAY!!!! stop it! You're giving me goose bumps! You should write for those smutty novels! LOL! Link to comment
ShySoul Posted January 7, 2006 Share Posted January 7, 2006 If you want a descriptive guide, there's a nice one. But the truth is you don't need it. Short of slobbering all over her or biting her, its hard to mess up a kiss. Just relax and go with how you feel. It's all instincts. There's no length of time that makes it good, no technique that you need to know. All you need is to go with how you feel, relax and live in the moment. As for how to start, if you are cuddling on a couch there will probably come a time when you just are looking at each other and you feel you want to kiss. Just lean in and kiss. Link to comment
Liam15 Posted January 7, 2006 Author Share Posted January 7, 2006 Ok, thanks a lot I'm really starting to like this forum One other question though. I know that we both want to kiss (her friends told me haha) and we have had a couple of pecks, so what I want to know is how I should try to kiss her. Should I try giving her a slower closed-mouth kiss, and if she looks like she wants more try an open-mouth kiss? Or would that be too formal for a sort of *real* kiss? Link to comment
ShySoul Posted January 7, 2006 Share Posted January 7, 2006 Best to start soft and slow and move onto longer and deeper kisses as you get into things. Trust me, it won't take long. Kissing can be a nervous and scary experience, but its not something you need to be that worried about. Relax and enjoy. You'll get the hang of it pretty quick and your questions will pretty much answer themselves. Have fun. Link to comment
Liam15 Posted January 7, 2006 Author Share Posted January 7, 2006 Ok, thanks Alright, I'm probably thinking too hard about this, but there's one more thing I've got on my mind. Here's the setting: we're going to be on her couch in the living-room area on the main floor, and her parents/brother are upstairs. If her parents came downstairs, we'd hear them coming, but the end of the stairs is right by the door to the living room, so would it be appropriate to kiss her in that situation? (And her parents do come down every now and then to go to the kitchen or whatever). Also, her parents like me (I think), if that makes any difference Link to comment
ShySoul Posted January 7, 2006 Share Posted January 7, 2006 Well, any time other people are around it makes it more akward. Would be strange to get caught and have to deal with her parents and how they may react. But since they like you it probably wouldn't be that big a deal to them. And they'll hopefully realize that you guys are going to be doing that, try to leave you alone. I wouldn't worry about it, just go with the feeling. Though if you are really concerned, waiting for a more private moment, just the two of you may be good. Link to comment
Liam15 Posted January 7, 2006 Author Share Posted January 7, 2006 Ok, thanks Probably what would happen is they'd just pretend they didn't see it haha. Anyway, I'm off now, I'll post how it went Link to comment
Liam15 Posted January 11, 2006 Author Share Posted January 11, 2006 Oops, I kind of forgot to post here after Anyway, I kind of blew it I guess What I decided was that it would be easier as a goodbye kiss. So when we were at the door and I was just about to go I was starting to lean in to kiss her but she hugged me (like we usually do to say goodbye). Is there any way I can show her that I want to kiss her not hug her? I started moving my arms like a hug so is there anything different I can do to to signal a kiss? And I'm definitely not going to say anything because that would be wayyy too hard Link to comment
ShySoul Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 Hey. You didn't blow it. You just have to wait a little longer. It took me forever before I got it right, but it was worth it in the end. Don't worry, it'll be worth the wait. If you want to kiss her, kiss her. On another post smallworld gave some advice that I think might also work in your kiss, so I'm going to steal it from her (hope she doesn't mind). Kiss her on the check. Inch the kisses closer to her lips. Think she should get the message. If she doesn't fight it, kiss her on the lips. Also give a long, adoring look into her eyes, a look that says you want to kiss her. It's hard to describe, but when you have those feelings the look kind of comes naturally and says everything. Don't get frustrated or give up. You'll end up kissing her and you'll love it, I promise. Link to comment
Liam15 Posted January 21, 2006 Author Share Posted January 21, 2006 I finally did it! We were at my house and we watched the 40 year old virgin (really funny and we just sort of cuddled for a while, then when she had to go, I just... did it I really didn't expect her to do much but it ended up lasting for about 30 seconds and in the first couple of seconds she started frenching me! At least I assume that's what it was, with tongue. That really threw me off but it was really awesome! I was glad she kind of lead it but I gave back a little tongue too After it was done I kind of realized that I had my eyes open most of the time I did think at all about it but I don't think she noticed. It can only get better from here Link to comment
ShySoul Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 LOL. So the 40 year old Virgin is the movie to use if you want to have some major kissing. I'll have to remember that. That's awesome. And her taking the lead is good, helps to take some of the pressure off you so you can enjoy it and get in the flow easier. A lot of guys would like a girl who does that more. But you're right, it can only get better from here. Enjoy it, kissing is very fun, isn't it? Link to comment
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