What do you think of boyfriend's friendships?

[may55]

OK gals, just curious. What do you all think of a situation where your boyfriend has virtually no friends of his own except for one family member? I dated someone like this for a long long time and was miserable myself. I wonder if this is telling for a man?

 

Then, next question: what do you think of a guy who seems way too into his friends, like he would rather spend New Year's with his guy buddies than you his girllfriend? Also dated someone like this, didn't work out.

 

Reason I ask is after a 6 month hiatus I am going to start dating again and curious about what a guy's friendships or lack of say about him.

 

Any thoughts?

[darkblue]

A lack of friendship probably means that he is quiet and not outgoing.

 

Spending 'too much time' with friends, or special occasions with them - means you need to sit him down and tell him you want to spend those days with him, just you and him.

[newts]

1. I am a very out going person and have many friends, all of my partners have been the same way. I would say people who don't have many friends either are reclusive and enjoy their own company far too much... or they are shy and find it very hard to interact with others.

 

2. I believe on important events such as new years, xmas, birthdays etc should be with your significant other. Men who like to hang out with the boys on these occasions usually are lads and prioritise their friends and the fun factor above their girlfriend. It is totally up to you what you accept, however, I would rather be with someone who would prefer to be with me on these occasions as there are so many other nights they can be with the lads.

[Mrocza]

I think too much of both is not good.

 

My boyfriend and I have a balance. We're friendly sociable people when we want to be and I guess, hermits at other times

 

I have a lot of "friends" but not many close friends. I stick closer to my family when it comes to problems and such. I can be quiet and prefer to stay in and watch movies to going out at times, so can my boyfriend. Other times, we go out with the whole gang, get drunk together, party all night long, spend our weekends at bars or clubs together...

 

I think you should find a guy who matches YOUR needs, not look for a guy whos either out going or introverted.

[registered]

Speaking from experience I'd say that it is harder to forge a good relationship (friendship or romantic) if one person enjoys life by being very social and the other by being very internal. It is too much of a clash of personalities.

It probably isn't impossible, I just think that it is harder.

 

I think it is perfectly fine to have no friends or to be at the other end of the scale and be "overly" social. I don't think it matters, it just means that you will have to meet someone similar (which is harder if one is like this) before you can be understood and before it will be easier enough for a relationship to be formed.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

hmmm....

 

Complicated. If I found out my significant other only had one friend in the world, I'd be concerned..either for them, as they must lack social skills or confidence...or I'd be concerned because something must be up with them if they have *No Friends*.

 

On the other side...well...my boyfriend spent new year with mates, but then that was arranged before we met, and I havnt met his friends or him mine because they have nothing in common (many reasons) so I dont know...Id expect him to spend New Year with me if we had met before his mates asked him to do anything.

 

Oh but actually..is that too controlling?!?? Hm. Sometimes I just need a night with my mates, I could understand where he was coming from.