Now that we've said, "I love you"...

[itsa lorah]

So!

I'm in a LDR. I'm leaving for the Air Force in two weeks, and he's coming to visit in tomorrow for a week.

We exchanged "I love you's" after MONTHS of tension. Before he said it, we spoke almost all day via texting, myspace messages, comments and whatnot. We both have jobs, so imagine the "oh we really shouldn't be doing this" feel to it all.

Getting to the point: now that it's "out there", we speak each day a few times a day. The romantic flirting has tapered off a bit as well. I sometimes feel now that we've said it, perhaps we feel we don't need to try so hard?

What does this mean? I'm following his lead, for I don't want to seem needy and too eager. I'm just so confused! Does this mean that things aren't going well? Since we've said it, it's as if the infactuation has gone away.

Do I just need to relax? Cause I can't, and it's driving me insane. Thanks everyone.

[registered]

Relax.

 

Also, you have to work to keep the romance there... it won't just come out of nothing

Take the lead, set an example, seem eager. He is probably feeling the same as you and so if you could get the ball rolling it would be great.

 

Think of all the ways you can be romantic and let him know you are thinking of him. Keep up the "I love you"s.

[lillady898]

You're thinking about it way too much. Just enjoy the moment and have a good time with him.

 

You still talk a few times a day? Maybe there is a big difference between talking a few times a day and talking all day, but a few times a day is still a lot of time hes willing to put aside for you.

 

Many people are lucky if they talk to someone they like/love a couple times a week.

[Scout]

This is definitely a discussion worth examining, I think it's more common than we realize that folks freeze up a bit in their relationship after saying "I love you." I personally think the reason is because we suddenly get afraid of the responsibility that comes with loving someone else. It's a commitment, and it's work, and it runs the risk of not working out, or it runs the risk that it does work out and we're with that person forever! thereforeeee, that little aftershock happens afterwards.

 

I remember my last boyfriend (not my current one) told me he was in love with me first. I got really excited and said me too! And then he immediately qualified his statement by saying "Now don't say it too much, or we'll ruin everything." Me being the obnoxious person I am, I immediately made him tell me he loved me about four more times in the next ten minutes. It was kind of funny and broke the ice, and we both said it pretty regularly afterwards. We didn't end up lasting, but trust me, saying "I love you" to each other wasn't the reason why; if anything, it kept us together a little bit longer than we probably would have if we weren't saying that.

 

With my current boyfriend, after we said the first "I love you's" I got a bit nervous for a day or so afterwards, but that soon dissipated. I made a point of being/behaving exactly the same before we said it, and in fact, was more laid back than usual so that he wouldn't think I thought the words gave me some new license on his life.

 

You guys will be fine...it's natural to have a few qualms after saying such meaningful words.