Should I be upset about not spending New Years with my BF?

[tulip7]

I'm not sure how I should feel about my boyfriend not inviting me to New Years at his 2nd home in Florida. His family, guy friends, and family friends were all there, so it was a packed house. He has been going through a really hard time with his parents separating and was especially upset his father was not there with them last night. Because of his parents situation and because everything was so hectic I understood him not inviting me down. But I can't help but keep thinking that shouldn't he want to be with me on new years and try to make it work to have me down there if he really loves me? (I know he does love me but are we on the same wavelength). Sometimes it feels like he wants things to be on his schedule. I won't be going down to see him until next week because its easier for him then. There have been other situations like this before but its too much to explain.

 

I've been dating my boyfriend for 1 year now. I've met his family several times, his friends, and familiy friends. All of them were there. He said it would just be too hectic and didn't want to not pay enough attention to me. They were all at a party at a restaurant until midnight, where he left with his friends and went to some after parties. I guess I feel left out a bit. but shouldn't I? I'm trying to think about this as reasonably a possible and not let my emotions get a hold of me. I should also say that he called me at 11:59 to watch the ball drop with me on the phone.(unfortunately i didnt get to my phone in time ) So I can't really be upset about that.

 

My thoughts about this just keep bouncing back and forth. I can understand where he is coming from but at the same time does he just want me when its convenient for him and if he really loves me shouldn't he try to make it so we are together on new years? I just want to know the right way to look at this... Thanks for listening.

[xmrth]

Your situation is ridiculously similar to mine. Except that in my relationship during the first couple of years I was included and yours is at your first year and this is happening.

You should read what advice I've gotten here:

and check some of my earlier posts if interested in hearing the advice I've gotten.

[tulip7]

i do trust him but i guess it upsets me that he'd rather spend new years like that than with me. granted i spent new years with my girlfriends and had fun hanging out with different guys, but I would have traded that for spending it with him. So I'm not sure how I should approach this and if I should say something to him about it.

[tulip7]

no, I didnt want to make a big deal of it. I understood his situation( i feel like a lot of it has to do with his family issues) and didn't want to seem like a needy girlfriend... But I've been thinking and I think i'm just going to start doing my own thing more and maybe be a little less accessible. Maybe then hell start to appreciate me. I think that maybe I'm too accessible. He chased me in the beginning and I resisted for long so I think when he got me he relaxed a bit. I love hanging out with my friends and being with the girls. I think I just need to do that more and let him come to me. Thats how it used to be and I think that's what I miss. Thanks a lot for your help. : ) If you have any other inputs let me know!

[tulip7]

I'm still not sure if he was right or wrong for doing that though.