Was it wrong? should i feel guilty?

[abcd1234]

Hey everyone,

 

About 5 days ago my girlfriend broke up with me becuase she says her feelings have changed towards me, i have naturally been very upset about this. Last night (new years eve), myself and a load of my friends all went to a house party to celebrate. I drank a lot and got really trashed.

 

We were stood there for the countdown and this girl had her hand on my * * *, then we went and kissed in the corridoor. The thing is, i feel really bad about it, it meant nothing to me and my gf only broke up with me 5 days before. I dont know what to do, should i tell her??

 

Also, i was told last nite that before she broke up wiv me, she thought she still had feelings for her ex. I just text her asking to meet up to discuss things, she refused and then insisted i tell her what it was, needless to say she went off the rails when i asked her about. Now she has stopped texting me.

 

I doubt she will want to be friends now. Any advice?

[DN]

Providing you are not misleading the new girl in any way, you did nothing wrong.

 

I think your best bet is to go no contact with your ex. It is too soon to even think about being friends, you need to 'disengage' your emotions first and regain emotional balance.

[newts]

she has feelings for her ex? how long were you going out?

[abcd1234]

Providing you are not misleading the new girl in any way, you did nothing wrong.

I am not misleading the new girl, we are both completely aware of where we stand with each other and she is aware of my situation. She text me this morning saying that we were both drunk and that it would probably be best if we just left it as a "new years" thing, i agreed.

 

I think your best bet is to go no contact with your ex.

I cant do no contact becuase we go to the same school and she is in my close circle of friends, it would only make things awkward for them as well as us, which i think is unfair.

 

she has feelings for her ex? how long were you going out?

We were together for just over a month. She insists she does not have feelings for her ex, it is complicated, but i do believe her. I have a very trustworthy friend who she discussed it all with and he decided to tell me becuase he thought it was for the best.

 

She finally text me back about 1/2 hour ago saying: "I dont hate you but this has been made way more complicated than it is. Im sorry for how i feel but i cant change it. I would meet up but there is no time. x"

 

I replied with the following: "I dont want you to change how you feel and im happy you were honest and didnt lead me on. Sorry for bringing all of this up, it was a little insensetive of me. If you want to then id like to put all of this behind us and work on trying to get our friendship back to where it was? I know it wont be easy but im up for it if you are?"

 

She replied with: "Only half of that came through but i got the gist. Sorry about not being able to meet up and for how i feel. Maybe soon we can get our friendship back. x"

 

I must point out that before we got together we were very close friends and told each other a lot. It was an amazing friendship and i think we both know now that it would be an amazing thing for us to get back, but also that it will take a lot of hard work emotionally.

 

I still dont know whether i should tell her about this other girl, it meant nothing to both of us so i dont see why it is important. My friends all thought that it was fine becuase my gf broke up with me so she shouldnt have a problem with it. I agree with them but it bothers me to think that if we are going to start our friendship over, i would be starting out with a lie.

[venus777]

you aren't starting out with a lie. and what if she made out with someone? you don't know what she is doing... when you break up with someone there is no longer any kind of responsibility to share such details. do you want her to care about it?? Because if she broke up with you because she has feelings for someone else, chances are she isn't very concerned about it... to be brutally honest.