Erection + Condoms = unhappy.

[Kalid32]

Okay, I'm an 18 year old guy...pretty sexually active for a couple years. First time I had sex, it was at a party, and I didn't use a condom (Stupid? Yes, but I got lucky...thank God). It was awesome.

 

Anyway, since then, I've been with girls, but didn't have sex, because they didn't want to, and I didn't want to pressure them into it.

 

Anyway, it started over the summer....I was hanging out with this girl, and we just started fooling around. It was kind of like a one night stand situation, since we only hung out like once before. Because we were both kind of nervous about the situation, it turned out to be A LOT of foreplay (I'm talking a few hours)...

 

Anyway, the question about sex arose, and we jumped on the idea. We got the condom, although (at the time I thought) my member just had enough, as I couldn't get him to get past half salute, making it impossible for me to put on the condom.

 

I didn't really think anything of it...I just thought it sucked that that happened...a lot.

 

Anyway, then I went off to college. I had no trouble getting him to stand tall for a bit of oral. I didn't have sex up at school, but got a bunch of other play, and had no problem keeping it up.

 

So, I came home, and started talking to an ex. We hit it off (again), and we started making out in my car. It's been one of my biggest fantasies to have sex in the back of a car, and it was finally going to happen. Throughout the foreplay (mutual masterbation and the like), he was standing tall...he couldn't have been happier. Continue with it, and we decide to go through with it. We were just fooling around for at least 2 hours. I finally get out the condom, and... * * *? it goes away. Extremely embarrassed...I told her to come to my house the next day, since I have it to myself during the daytime.

 

I went home, and was kind of worried, so I decided to try it by myself. I tried to masterbate with a condom. I got an erection, and put it on, and it started to go away, I had to feverishly play with it to stay up....but it did...so I thought it was fine.

 

She came over the next day, and we wasted no time. About 15-20 mins of foreplay till we break out the condom. this time I get it on, then as soon as it gets on, even before I enter, it goes away AGAIN! How embarrassing is that?!!!?

 

 

It ruined one of my biggest fantasies, and has cost me getting laid twice in 2 days. How can I Get my penis to stop protesting condoms by going into hiding when I bring one out?

 

 

I don't think it's 'stage fright' as I have had sex before, and made me feel really good about myself, as the girl wasn't a virgin, but was 100% convinced I wasn't one when I told her....Plus I made her walk funny for a few days because she said I Was so big

 

now I'm pretty sure it's going to be a big problem now, because whenever I'm with a girl now that's going to be on my mind. ](*,)

[shorty20]

could the condoms u are trying to use posssibly be too small? Maybe experiment with different sizes, brands,etc. to see what works best for you

[Kalid32]

don't think so...I mean when I put one on and actually maintained an erection (albeit it was some work), it fit fine.

[Beec]

Hand it to her, have her get you excited and put it on.

 

You get all excited and then turn your back on her and it droops. Get her to do it and keep you excited.

[darkblue]

Agreed with Beec.

[Kalid32]

I just don't get it, though. She was giving me a handjob until I unwrapped the damn thing....it doesn't even go down that fast after I climax...

 

 

EDIT: I was just thinking...could it still be 'stage fright?' I mean, the first time I had sex, I was definitely not sober...could it just have taken a back seat due to the booze?

 

 

Also, I'm kind of a 'ladie's man' as you say...all my friends don't know how to do it, but when ever we go to a party, I always hook up with someone.

 

If the above is true, I don't want to have to be drunk everytime I want to have sex...Also, asking the girl from the first post to put it on wouldn't be that weird...but it would kind of make me feel weird to ask every girl I'm with to put it on for me...I would rather not have to rely on those 2 things just so I'm able to perform.

[FCTex]

No, it shouldnt be weird.

 

It's anxiety getting to you. You think too much about it, and your worrying about it, which is going to put un wanted pressure on YOU, and lead you to not be as "in the zone" or the like, causing the "drop" in your fun.

 

Sounds like your not comfortable with it all, not even just sex.. Your remarks lead me to believe your insecure with yourself a little, and perhaps that might be a little bit of your problem there too!

[musicguy]

FCTex has a good answer, cuz sometimes I got that way too when I was with my ex. It's like I'd get all excited, then it would go away.

[Kalid32]

but then what should I do? and why did it not happen the first time?

[FCTex]

Because, you must have been like you said, drunk. And your inhabitions, lowered..

 

Because it wasn't on your mind, you didn't care, and when you were carefree, you had fun, or in the end, had sex..

 

You probably are just insecure about something, work on that, and get comfortable.. Like I said.. Your not comfortable, and your worried it's going to happen again, so your expecting it.. On top of it, like I said, you sound insecure, and that you need reassurance or something.. "She said I was so big, she couldn't walk hardly the next day.. "..I'm a ladies man, none of my friends know how to do it, but I always hook up with someone at parties, etc".

 

That pretty much sounds like your insecure w/ yourself, and hence your going to be self conscious about it, and your problem, and in the end, only making it worse.

 

Just relax I guess is all one can say.. Don't feel like it's going to happen and don't think about it. Just act like you've done it a million times. Your first time, you probably didnt realize what all you were doing, so this time, it's your first, "sober" experience, hence, much like the first time, your nervous.

[MissJones]

Personally, I hate condoms but I have no choice - better to be safe than sorry. I find that most guys I've been with don't like them either because it kind of kills the sensation. Skin to skin is fantastic with someone you know has been tested and is clean but in this day and age you can't afford to not don a 'dom if you're picking up randoms at parties. Try different brands until you find one that you really like.