Confused... about this friend.

[sarangeh]

There are seven of us friends. All of us have been friends for like 6 years or more. We all met at school and from then on, all of us are always together. I always like or I am attracted to cute tall guys, and one of my friends falls on that category. I "used" to like or have a crush on him. Not a strong crushy feeling, I guess its your normal crush that when he's around your excited and if he is not, everything is still dandy. There was one time a few months back, that we played truth or dare. I was asked a question (truth aspect) if I have a crush on "him". I admitted I "used" to but not anymore. and that is that.

 

But from then on whenever I call him (the reason for the call is just so to tell him about getting all of us together or some occasion) I can feel that he is uneasy, like somehow putting a barrier, like the last time I called, Just so all of us can watch Harry Potter's recent movie. He immediately refused, I mean it sounded like rushing to refuse. You know not like a friend who casually say, ahh geez i wish I could come but dam nammit I cant coz I have already made plans. or so on and so forth. And its not like I'm calling him for a date or anthing. well that is how I felt anyway when I called. There is also this recent occasion that I'm really more confused about. Last Saturday, one of my friends is having a party and unfortunately I can't sleep over this time, coz I have a family gathering the next day. Other than me, there's also 'him" who cant stay as well, so I asked him if I could get a ride home from him, at first he accepted. nearing midnight I asked him, if he is leaving, he said not yet, coz he feels a little tipsy. So I said Okay, whenever you feel bette, its okay. 2 AM came and all of us is just sitting watching TV some are falling asleep including me, He got up and gets his coat, my girlfriend wakes me up and tells me me and him are leaving. I rushed and asked him if he's leaving, he said he's just going out for fresh air. I was kinda half asleep and pleaded, don't leave me, okay. He said not to worry. A few minutes later, we hear his car come to life outside and he drove off. I felt, what the heck!!! WHAT!!! HE LEFT ME!!!! I was so furious that I wanted to cry. I had no choice that night just to stay over and lucky for me my friend's parents is going to work the next day so, they were able to drive me home on the way to work. I am just confused as to why this friend of mine is acting strange. He wasnt like that at all, and from what I observed now, he's acting so far from his character. Is he scard to be alone with me??? or something, I know that sometimes, we get teased but that is all for fun, there is no malice to it. So I'm a bit confused and I still feel bad about last Saturday, I dont feel like talking to him the next time I see him.

 

Please I need your opinion on what you see about my situation.Thank you in advance.

[Mrocza]

He sounds like a jerk and not much of a friend. Regardless if it makes him uncomfortable, leaving you like that was plain rude.

 

I really think you should talk to him. Don't go to him in tears, don't go ready to rip his nuts off, go calmy and without emotion tell him how you feel.

 

Tell him he's been acting weird around you and you think it's because of the truth/dare incident. Tell him you're sorry to burst his bubble, you are no longer, nor were you ever really, interested in him.

Tell him he's acting immature for not being able to face you straight up about it if it's bothering him so much.

That what he did at the party was something you'd never expect of him, but you're glad it happened so you could see him true colours.

 

I personally wouldn't want to continue a friendship with a guy like him. Regardless if he's acting out of character, he still did it to you.

[blueangel]

Don't make assumptions as to whether or not it's your fault. Talk with him and find out what's going on inside of him. He could be going through something. It's okay to mention the truth or dare moment and how you wonder if that upsets him. If it really is that then just talk him through how to make it easier. Tell him you dont want to lose him as your friend... but also realize that sometimes we have to let people go. The changes of life never cease... but no matter what, your bond and your memories will ALWAYS be there.

 

And like a friend, just be there for him. Try to find out what is going on, but dont blame yourself for his actions. Those are his own and maybe in time, they would have happened anyway. You dont know until you find out.