Confused

[silkysmooth]

I have a business partner/lover. Friends for maybe 4-5 years prior to becoming closer on a personal level(about 2 years). Lately (in the last couple of weeks), he has been extremely distant on a personal level. We only talk about business and maybe occasionally about minor things that are going on. Prior to this we talked on the phone several times everyday. I am a pretty level headed person, but I have been receiving mixed signals from him which I don't understand. One week after his "transition" we were talking on the phone and he was giving me hints to my Christmas gift. From what I gather (physical evidence including-receipts!) the gift if at least four figures in price and it's jewelry (not an engagement ring), he made that clear. I know your question as to whether this gift is for me...I am 99.9% sure and it is not wishful thinking.

 

Question..Why such an expensive/personal gift if we are not together on a personal level? Now I have heard of "guilt gifts" but, not one so expensive. What's the deal?

[darkblue]

Hi, and welcome to enotalone.

 

I am slightly confused as to what the situation is now.

Is he your partner?

[rionmccloud]

Okay, first there are several things that don't mix. May not help now, but maybe in the future. Never mix Business with pleasure. Or Business with family, for the most part.

 

Talk to him. Say "Hey. I was just wondering what's going on. You're distant. Need to chat?" But, is this a known relationship? Or you the "other woman"? These make a major difference.

[silkysmooth]

No, I am not the other woman. He is not married and neither am I. I am a VERY key partner in our business.

 

Yes, this is a known relationship.

 

And yes I have asked the question that you posed. I did not get a definitive answer. Apparently he's not ready to chat.

[alrightie_ms]

Welcome to dealing with a "confused people" world I guess silkysmooth!

 

Somehow, have been in the same situation as you are for the past 3 years. I wanted out, been pushing for out by stressing on commitment, just to see where he might stand. And I got my answer, though still a VERY "confused" answer/action from him.

 

You have to set your priority straight silkysmooth when dealing with these kind of people. If not, take it from my experience, your life will be on a roller coaster ride! Not the fun one though.

[silkysmooth]

Thanks you guys...I got the ring....plus an extra added bonus. I accepted both graciously. After a lenghty discussion, we both agreed to keep it on a friendship/business level. No hard feelings from either camp. I don't want to wallow in "playing the victim". That's just not my style. The "bags are unpacked" and we both know where we stand. No place to go but UP!