Update on Ex, he is Calling Again

[kate111]

WooHoo! Good for you Cap.

 

Yes Xmas and New Year will be tricky but be good to yourself. New beginnings remember? Also Xmas and New Year celebrations are a great opportunity to meet someone else. Make sure yu are near someone cute on the stroke of midnight.

[thlst3]

I just wanted to say you're doing a great job. I hope I can be as strong as you.

 

Good luck.

[capricorn85]

Thank you thlst3 and Kate! Well tonight I got five private calls! On top of that, someone left me a voicemail of a song. I'm pretty sure it was him. The song goes like this:

 

Gotta change my answering machine

Now that I'm alone

Cuz right now it says that we

Can't come to the phone

And I know it makes no sense

Cuz you walked out the door

But it's the only way I hear your voice anymore

(it's ridiculous)

It's been months

And for some reason I just

(can't get over us)

And I'm stronger then this

(enough is enough)

No more walkin round

With my head down

I'm so over being blue

Cryin over you

 

And I'm so sick of love songs

So tired of tears

So done with wishing you were still here

Said I'm so sick of love songs so sad and slow

So why can't I turn off the radio?

 

After listening to the voicemail, I knew it had to be him! I didnt pick up any of his calls! I feel myself getting a little stronger, but I hate when he does this. He also IM'd my friend asking if we were home..

[bsp_kjm]

stay strong cap, u are doing a great job!!

[capricorn85]

The EX called me soo many times yesterday from private. So i called back. Was really nonchalant, he said he was in the area. He came over about an hour later. We spoke. He asked me questions about guys which I didnt answer. He asked if I was talking to anyone new. He did all of the asking. We kissed. I felt noting. I looked at him and realized that the NC had worked. I felt like the tables turned. After seeing him yesterday I no longer want to be with him. When he left I didnt beg for him not to leave. I said BYE. He said "do not say bye, say see you later." In my head I thought I wont be seeing you later. So the point is that I didnt have any intenton of seeing my ex. But after a month of NC, seeing him helped me realize that he wasnt all of that to begin with.

[kellbell]

Way to go Cap!!! See how important NC is? If you continued to talk to him and see him, then you wouldn't have been in the position you are now. You are so much better off. I have to say I am very proud of you and you've come soooo far. I am so happy for you. Now that the NewYear is almost here, you are starting with a clean slate, no more emotional baggage. That has to be the best Christmas gift ever! Take care and Happy Holidays.

[novaseeker]

There you go! It's a good feeling, isn't it, when you realise that you've moved on, and your NC really helped you with that!

[capricorn85]

Yup! The ex called today to wish me a merry christmas. I almost didnt pick up, but I did. We spoke for like 3 minutes then I ended the call. He was saying something, but I cut him off when I said bye take care, lol. Oh well. I realize that i should not waste my time on him. The next time he calls he won't hear from me.

[capricorn85]

Helllo ALL! I had a relpase. My ex came over again yesterday. I tried my hardest to ignore but after he left I was a little down this time I text him and stood up for myself and told him I do not want a friendship and that me and him should not chill and that I am closing this chapter in the life. SOOO HARD TO DO! He then called me saying that he has good ideas for us! So me being dumb I thought maybe he realized what he lost! Nope I was wrong. He said the good idea was him not coming over anymore. I became a little upset and I told him he cannot give me MIXED SIGNALS! I cut it off COMPLETELY. I told him that we will not speak anymore. I then told him have a happy new yr/bday. Afterwards, I cried a little. I guess just cutting him off forever hurt. Anyway today is my b-day guys and I'm a little down.......It's time to do NC all over again!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I cannot believe he is like that. He said he likes/loves me but he doesnt want to be in a classification of being in a relationship. What a loser!!!

[kellbell]

Awww Cap, I am so sorry. Happy Birthday!!! (((hugs)))

 

Once you realize the kind of person your Ex REALLY is and not what you thought he was...then the healing process gets a little easier. I know it hurts really bad when you finally let go...believe me I know...but you know it is for the best and most of the time, the best things are not only the right things...they are the hardest things.

 

Hang in there. You are doing great!

[kate111]

Cap you are doing really well.

 

I hope you meet someone really nice soon.

[capricorn85]

Hey guys, well new years eve was the exe's b-day! I managed to NC! Thank you everyone for your support. I look at my progress and I am proud of myself! I also met someone nice a few days ago. He is really sweet, and I actually like him. I just have trouble believing things he tells me, because my ex broke my heart. It has been almost four months since the break up and this is the first guy I actually connect with. How do I prevent myself from thinking that every guy is like my ex??

[kate111]

Take things very slow and do not rush into things.

 

Make sure you keep yourself busy with your hobbies and don't give up everything you like doing.

 

Remember actions speak louder than words. Judge him by what he does (ie whether he rings on time, takes you to nice places etc) rather than what he tells you.

 

Take it slow.