feeling lonely

[feather2006]

My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years, its an LDR. We've met in person about 3 times and spent time together and we are a very good couple, we never fight. the problem is that i'm sick of him pretty much paying more attention to sports and tv and stuff more than me. ok, i like sports a lot too, i was raised on them, but i never put them before him. he watches sports ALL weekend and when he does talk to me, which is really late at night when i'm sleepy, he's usually reading or something, so when i initiate conversation he's barely listening to me.

 

so basically, he'll call me during the day for 5 minutes and then say "i'll call you back later". yes, i understand that he needs time to do his own stuff and i go out with friends and work and do other things with my life. we give each other PLENTY of space. but i'm always there for him when he needs to talk and stuff, but he's barely there for me anymore. back in july my mom had a serious illness and was rushed to the hospital and i needed to talk to him, we talked for 10 minutes and he then told me, "i need to catch the dog he ran out of the house" and he never called me back until maybe 4 hours later.

 

but when he's at home watching football ALL day, you'd think he could call me up or go online or something to talk to me. he can watch football and chat online at the same time couldn't he? it just makes me mad that i go out of my way to spend time with him, but i dont get it in return. after i've been at work or out with others i find myself sitting at home lonely, like i dont even have a boyfriend. sometimes the way this is going i feel like i could just cheat on him and he'd never know. it just gets me so mad sometimes. i dont know what to do about this, i just need advice if any of you have been in the same shoes

[kellbell]

Hey there and Welcome.

 

 

I am sorry you having a tough time and LDRs make it so much harder. I am sorry to write but he is just not that into you. You are not his priority, sports and his dog are. And with technology today (email, IM, texting, cell phones), there is no excuse for any of his behavior except that you are not his mind. I am so sorry to write this because I know this whole ordeal has been stressful for you. You are so young, go out have fun! Don't waste it on this guy. You deserve to be with someone who cant wait to call you and talk to you for hours.

[DN]

It is possible that he is 'not into you' as kellbell says. But is may be that he is not comfortable talking on the phone. I am like that, I can talk the hind leg off a donkey face to face but find phone conversations difficult for some reason.

[ReadyorNot]

Well... I understand you needed to talk to him when your mother was ill, but Ive had to look for my dog for 4 hours a few times... she is good now, thank goodness.... I dont know if you have any pets... but the feelings that run through you when they take off and get lost is unbelieveable...

 

I'd search all night if I had too...

 

I hope your mom is better now..

[feather2006]

i have pets too, i'm an animal lover. but that was actually his brother's dog and his brother and his two cousins were already out looking for it. but yeah, i dont know. he used to talk to me more, he claims he misses me all day and he loves me and wants to marry me but you know, if you miss someone THAT much your'e gonna call them. never makes sense.

[Rabican]

4 years and you have only seen him 3 times... I wouldnt even call that a BF but thats just me.

 

If a guy is serious about you though, and cares about you... then he WILL make some time for you. If he wont make a few minutes for you then maybe you should give up any ideas of being with him. Doesnt sound like you are asking for too much... a few minutes on the phone while hes watching tv doesnt sound like a whole lot for a guy to give.

 

Maybe find someone who will appreciate your time more?