All this talk about signals etc.........

[bobster]

In my 18 months of being a member on this site and reading all these threads about "does she/he like me" or "Is that a good sign/signals" I have come to the following conclusion:

If you get talking to someone that you quite like and would want to get to know them for a possible relationship, then the only way of not getting hurt (and end up posting countless threads on here) is to ASK that person out.

 

I have posted tones of questions about signals, good signs, does she like me's etc. only to find that women flirt, so do us men. We all get lead on. I have been lead on and been hurt far to many times with flirtatious women (who either were not interested in getting to know me personally or had partners!) Ask that person out however, and you get your answer. Yes or no. Don't put up with undecided answers like "maybe some other time" or "I'm not sure" etc because that means NO!

 

I have since asked a woman out when she first started flirting with me and she gave me a very polite no, as she was involved with someone long term. This woman gave me the impression that she was absolutely available but with a little boldness on my part, I asked her and now I know where I stand with her. (I'd love her boyfriend to know how she acts around men, then maybe she wouldn't be in a relationship!!!).

 

Take care

Bobster

[OceanEyes]

Great topic bobster. I often find myself thinking the same thing regarding 'signals' and 'what does this mean', etc. It's truly impossible to know for sure unless you take things a step further and just ask the person out.

 

(I'd love her boyfriend to know how she acts around men, then maybe she wouldn't be in a relationship!!!).

 

Well, in this case, I don't think that flirtation is that big of a deal. Many people flirt, but it's usually men who automatically assume that the woman is interested in a sexual relationship with him, just because she flirts.

 

Good for you on being bold. At least now you can cut your losses and move onto bigger and better things.

[make_up_your_mind]

bobster...

 

led*

 

NOT ... lead

[Dating Coach]

Bobster, yes, this is exactly what I keep telling people. Even the very positive signs of touching and poking can be misinterpreted. There is only ONE way to know for sure, and this is why guys who are scared of rejection fail so often and end up wasting tons of time persuing a dead end. You MUST make your intentions clear FROM THE START.

[bobster]

Bobster, yes, this is exactly what I keep telling people. Even the very positive signs of touching and poking can be misinterpreted. There is only ONE way to know for sure, and this is why guys who are scared of rejection fail so often and end up wasting tons of time persuing a dead end. You MUST make your intentions clear FROM THE START.

 

I couldn't agree more! thanks for your post!

[bobster]

it's usually men who automatically assume that the woman is interested in a sexual relationship with him, just because she flirts.

 

Hahaha! Oh c'mon Ocean, are you surprised? Flirting is teasing and you know what kind !!!

[Lion-Guy]

You MUST make your intentions clear FROM THE START.

 

I totally agree guys!!!! Why didn't I understand this a few weeks ago??