What about Christmas?

[HeartBrokenHistorian18]

Hi everyone,

 

I just joined because two nights ago, my boyfriend and I broke up, just a few days before our two-year anniversary. We still love each other very much, but we're just looking for two different people. Since we first got in a fight about a little thing, which escalated into breaking up, I'm hoping that we just need some time apart, time to calm down. But, since Christmas is coming up, I'm not sure if we should pretend that we're still together or not. We were both going to go to each other's family Christmases, and my parents already bought him a gift, and his parents and family would expect me to be there. So, should we pretend and then let them know after Christmas? Or should we just let everyone know at Christmas? Thanks for all of your help.

 

HeartBrokenHistorian18

[catgirl82]

no no no, dont pretend just for the sake of your families!! they will understand. they can go return the gifts if they want.

 

if you guys are really broken up, its time to start the healing process- youre only going to make it much harder if you pretend to be dating so that you can have the christmas you expected.

 

tell them before christmas so that its not a huge deal that day- it will make it easier.

 

it sounds to me like you guys are unsure of your split, like you might get back together? im not quite sure i understand

[HeartBrokenHistorian18]

Thanks for replying catgirl (I'm a cat lover too, if that's what your name implies). I think we really are broken up, but we still love each other, and we still want to be with each other. We still want to hold hands and kiss each other, but he has made the decision that we'll be happier as friends. But when we were dating we did get into fights often, and he decided that one big "hurt" would be better than him hurting me often.

 

It's just frustrating because I did so much to make the relationship work. I would cook him dinner, buy him little gifts, do everything to make him happy, and he never did any of those things in return. I have a feeling that I'm better off without him, but it still just hurts. Especially since it was just a few days ago, and what was supposed to be our two-year-anniversary is this Saturday.

 

My parents never liked him, and neither did the rest of my family. Mainly because we're 6 years different in age. I'm 18 and he's 24. Thanks for your input though. I think that not pretending and telling our families might be best.

 

HBH18

[acuraman]

I sorry to hear that you and your boyfriend broke up. My girlfriend just broke up with me tonight too. Don't pretend to make your families happy by pretending to be together. The best thing to do is just not talk about it unless someone asks, but they should get the point when they realize that he/you aren't there.

[HeartBrokenHistorian18]

I'm sorry to hear that acuraman. Sucks, doesn't it? But I think that I am better off without him. He didn't appreciate everything I did for him. There was a reason that we broke up, just like I'm sure there was a reason why you and your girlfriend broke up. It's really hard to go through, but I'm already feeling better. I'm sure you will too. Good luck.

[acuraman]

I'm sorry to hear that acuraman. Sucks, doesn't it? But I think that I am better off without him. He didn't appreciate everything I did for him. There was a reason that we broke up, just like I'm sure there was a reason why you and your girlfriend broke up. It's really hard to go through, but I'm already feeling better. I'm sure you will too. Good luck.

 

It does SUCK! The break up is hard right now, but with Christmas and New Years coming up, it makes it even harder because those are the holidays one does not want to be single.

 

You are right that there is a reason behind all of this, but why can't it just happen after Christmas? Anyways, its good to hear that you are doing better, and I hope that things work out for you as well.