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I need some encouragement!!!

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Hiya guys!


I'm new here so please bear with me.. I need some encouragement regarding a break up.. I am not sure where to begin but here goes.. I'd been with my b/f for 9 months and all of a sudden he broke up with me.. I was devasted and i cried some much that i ended up having an asthma attack.. Now he wouldn't leave me alone.. He keeps ringing me and asking me if i would take him back.. I tried the no contact and it seemed to be working for me until I see him out at the weekend.. He keeps doing things infront of me with other women and then he keeps asking me back out.. This has been going on for 3 months now..


He rang me on Monday of this week and asked me if i still loved him.. I told him no (which is a lie) and I said to him don't ring me, text me, or email me again.. I hate you and I don't trust you.. I also said you will never find anyone as good as me.. Then i put the phone down on him..


I haven't heard anything from him since.. This is good as this is what i wanted.. I still miss him so much and I can't stop thinking about him.. I have done this for myself as I feel he would have just caused me more heartbreak..


Have I done the right thing?


Thanks for listening...

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I believe you have done the right thing. The fact that he deliberately done things with women infront of your face - proves that he doesn't care enough about you.


You also did the right thing by telling him not to contact you.


Here's a tip: everytime you find yourself thinking about him - consciously STOP, and think about something else.

It's hard to get over someone that you invested your time, feelings and memories with. But time is a healer. And sleep safe in the knowledge that there is someone out there that is right for you.


Take care and stay strong.

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Thanks for the words of wisdom.. I have been thinking about him at my lowest points, like being alone on a night time and when we would have normally spent time together.. I try and do things that I normally don't do and it's sort of working.. I just miss him as he was the only one who understood me completey.. I have had many b/f's in the past and he just seemed so different.. I was totally wrong about him..


Cheers darkblue...


Becks x

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Well, it seems like you both want each other back, but I see one big issue. In a good relationship, you need to each show three things: friendship; respect; and passion. His respect for you seems to be missing here, and without that, what have you. This is the kind of man that treats you like a doormat to wipe his feet when he is done.

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Hi beec


I would have given him another chance if he had shown me some respect.. Things between us were great and we have a very good relationship.. Then he finished with me but then seemed to want me back straight away.. I thought long and hard about what I was going to do and after everything he has put me through.. I can't give him another chance.. I hate the things he has done to me but i can't seem to get him out of my head.. Time is a healer but it's so hard when he is out on a weekend in the same pubs as me.. Why should I change my route of pubs for him?


Thanks for listening!!

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Well, time helps you heal, but each time you see him, it is like picking at a scab. The more you pick, the longer it takes to heal. I'm not telling you to change your pubs, but maybe you should pay some attention to a guy in those pubs who shows you some respect. Instead of looking at him try to make you jealous, you might find something better.

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Very good advice so far. I would like to throw in a few things.


Respect the pain of breaking up. It hurts so bad, and it is totally ok to feel horrible. You do what you need to do to heal. If that does mean changing the places you hang out at for a while, do it. It doesnt make you any less of a person, it just makes you humble.


Keep at it and do whatever it is that you have to do to heal your heart.


Good luck with everything.

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