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Advice on contacting old friends

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Hi, so I'm needing advice here...mostly because I'm really dysfunctional when it comes to friendships and relationships. Anyway, here's my question.


So I had these two friends in college, I haven't talked to them in a while so I sent them messages asking them to contact me so we can catch up. But they never sent me anything back. I don't know why. And I don't know if they don't want to talk to me and want me to leave them alone or if they just missed my messages and if I sent another they would get it and we'd start talking.


For anyone who wants more detail, I had one friend, let's call him "Bob" and we met our first year in college and third year we were roommates. Then the fourth and fifth year we lived on different floors and didn't get to talk a lot. He's pretty outgoing but I find it hard to start conversations. So I'm sure the last time we talked was May 2003 at graduation. But as far as I know we parted on good terms and he has no reason to be mad at me or ignore me. On the other hand I sent him an ICQ asking him to email me (because I'm on dial-up access) and I'm pretty sure he got it because he's on all the time and I send other ICQ's successfully. I sort of want to send him an email but I'm not sure if his old college address will still work and if he doesn't want to talk to me I want to respect that.


My other friend, let's call him "Ishmael" was a really good friend and the only friend I've ever opened up to about my feelings or let really know me. But then I messed it all up because I'm an idiot and started a huge fight and didn't realize it was all my fault and what a total moron I was until a year later. Anyway, I hadn't spoken to him since March 2001, but just last April I sent him an apology. I don't even know how I got the courage or what I was thinking but I did. And he forgave me, he was always a really nice guy. And we sent a couple emails back and forth just saying we were working but not really catching up, I guess it was just weird to talk. Well, two weeks ago I sent him a little email, really short just asking him how he was doing. But he never replied. I'm pretty sure he got it because it went from my gmail to his gmail just like earlier this year. So maybe he decided he didn't want to talk to me, and I don't want to bug him. Or maybe it got classified as spam and he never read it.


I'd really like to hear more about my old friends lives but want to respect their privacy too. My head tells me to leave them alone but my heart wants to reach out again. What do you think?

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Don't stress hun, sometimes people get busy with life and don't have time to get online and check their mail as often as they used to. I'm a prime example, my computer and I shared an umbilical cord. I checked my mail before school, during lunch, after school, before work, after work, etc. My financial situation has changed where for a great deal of time I didn't have internet access, and I lost touch with a lot of people that way. Give it time, you'll get replies. Good things happen to those who wait.

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