MissDez Posted August 2, 2005 Share Posted August 2, 2005 I've read a few posts about this subject on the forum... I'm 21, and very mature for my age. I was forced to grow up at an early age of 16, so I feel that i'm most experienced with situations , and secure about what I want in life. I met this 34 year old , who is absolutly amazing.. We enjoy spending time with eachother, and have a great time... We both understand the age gap, and we are both aware of it... So please, tell me... Where is the problem?? Link to comment
DN Posted August 2, 2005 Share Posted August 2, 2005 There isn't one if you are sure that you will be happy together. Just be sure that you are independent, know what you want in your life (other than a relationship with him) and are mature enough to handle any problems that do arise. Link to comment
swift44 Posted August 2, 2005 Share Posted August 2, 2005 you guyz are both adults, i dotn see nothing wrong with it personally as long as you guyz are on the same level or both of you guyz are comfortable everythifn seems cool Link to comment
melrich Posted August 2, 2005 Share Posted August 2, 2005 There shouldn't be a problem if the two of you are comfortable with it. Link to comment
kungfumaster Posted August 3, 2005 Share Posted August 3, 2005 There isn't one if you are sure that you will be happy together. Just be sure that you are independent, know what you want in your life (other than a relationship with him) and are mature enough to handle any problems that do arise which will certainly arise and will be too great for one or both of you to handle, at which point you will break up... sad but true. sorry. Link to comment
DN Posted August 3, 2005 Share Posted August 3, 2005 There isn't one if you are sure that you will be happy together. Just be sure that you are independent, know what you want in your life (other than a relationship with him) and are mature enough to handle any problems that do arise which will certainly arise and will be too great for one or both of you to handle, at which point you will break up... sad but true. sorry. My sister in law married a man 19 years older than her when she was 21 - still married 35 years later. Link to comment
lady00 Posted August 3, 2005 Share Posted August 3, 2005 There isn't one if you are sure that you will be happy together. Just be sure that you are independent, know what you want in your life (other than a relationship with him) and are mature enough to handle any problems that do arise which will certainly arise and will be too great for one or both of you to handle, at which point you will break up... sad but true. sorry. Try not to think that way. You never know the potential of a relationship and it can only hurt to doom it from the start. Be hopeful, happy. Enjoy the relationship and believe that it will work. If you don't, it won't. Link to comment
Hope75 Posted August 3, 2005 Share Posted August 3, 2005 We both understand the age gap, and we are both aware of it... So please, tell me... Where is the problem?? Why would you think there was a problem? Link to comment
youcantliveinthewoods Posted August 3, 2005 Share Posted August 3, 2005 i know of many relationships with large age gaps b/w partners that have been (and still are) successful and lasting. are you having doubts? if so, try and get to the heart of them: if you are, is it really the age difference you're doubting? or is it something else that is simply masquerading as such? follow your deepest instincts, and don't be afraid to confront your qualms. chances are, it'll only make your relationship more intimate and secure. if it doesn't for some reason and you realize that things with him just don't feel comfortable/ like they're going to work out, then you'll move on to find someone who does. you have nothing to lose; if you love someone and both of you are adults (which you are), then i don't think age matters unless you decide it does. besides, i've noticed that the older you get, the less age differences matter, since they become more easily overlooked. take care and have faith in yourself!!! Link to comment
MissDez Posted August 4, 2005 Author Share Posted August 4, 2005 well, Everyone makes a good point... And to answer youcan'tliveinthewoods's question... No, i'm not having any doubts... Neither of us are, as a matter of fact. We take it one day at a time, and whatever situations and problems come up, we deal with it. Who says that love, or even lust, have to have an age on it. I believe that if you are old enough to make your own decisions, and take responsibility for whatever happens, and be aware of the ups and downs, then i say "go for it!" Thanks for the posts everyone !!! Link to comment
Crickett Posted August 7, 2005 Share Posted August 7, 2005 I have been dating a man who is 25 years oldr than me for about a year now and we are as happy as ever. This are still going great between us. I say, keep giving it a chance. It may or may not work out, but that is the same in all relationships reguardless of age. Link to comment
thewriterslife Posted August 8, 2005 Share Posted August 8, 2005 Age makes no difference. I have been with someone for ten years and we are very happy. He is nine years younger than I am. Remember, love is ageless. Link to comment
bischou Posted August 8, 2005 Share Posted August 8, 2005 the only problem I've experienced is that the younger person is less mature and doesn't deal with things as well due to limited life experience, it can be hard on the other person By the sounds of it you are way more mature for your age and why not I have been dating a 25 year old and I'm 39 Don't concern yourself too much about it as in the end it's how you both feel about each other is important, not what others think Link to comment
danigurlx90x Posted August 9, 2005 Share Posted August 9, 2005 My parents were 18 years apart in age. I believe age doesnt matter one bit.. I love older guys, I can't help it either. Link to comment
wccjr Posted August 9, 2005 Share Posted August 9, 2005 My wife and I are 15 years different. I've never seen it as a problem and don't sense she does either. Often I act younger than her anyway and I'm definitely in better health. Some things come up that we both find amusing though. Like talking about high school graduation and telling her she was only in diapers at the time. Or her going to her 10 year reunion when I'm headed to my 25th. If stuff like that bothers you, including when you are around other people, it probably will get worse. If not, you shouldn't have a problem. But you may also want to consider how long the males in her family normally live as well. Link to comment
justpaisley Posted August 11, 2005 Share Posted August 11, 2005 My dad married a woman 13 years his junior. When they met, he was 36, she was 23. They've been married for 9 years now, still very happy. If you were an immature 21 (like most 21-year-olds are nowadays, let's face it) then it'd be a problem. But if y'all can handle the age difference and the subsequent taboos then you'll be fine. Good luck - I hope you find much happiness in life! Link to comment
lookingforclosure5 Posted August 18, 2005 Share Posted August 18, 2005 MissDez... I have been in a couple relationships with someone several years my senior.... the one problem i have found is that the older man starts to think about what might be "good for you" ie- she will eventually want a younger man.... i should just let her... if i leave her now, it will help her in the long run. it is a phase some older men go through... it will take a lot of confidence boosting on your part to get him to feel secure. Link to comment
novaseeker Posted August 29, 2005 Share Posted August 29, 2005 The thing that is important is what is in your head and how much that matters to you: in other words, be aware that many people in the world will have issues with relationships that have substantial age gaps in them, even if they themselves are not involved with the relationship ... people assume a lot, and they will make judgments about you whether you like it or not. SO a key to this is being able to say "I don't care what other people think" ... if you can't do that, then this will be very hard because you will always be looking over your shoulder at other folks who will not approve of your relationship, for whatever reason they may have. That, to me, is the biggest issue and risk for these kinds of relationships. I have to say I myself was skeptical of these kinds of relationships until I fell in love with someone who was 16 years younger than me. I worried about the age difference a bit at first, but as we got to know each other better and the love bloomed into its fullness, it didn't matter much to me anymore, and I just decided to "go with it" ... others may not approve, but I love him, and I don't really care. But not everyone has that same mentality, so you kind of have to have that degree of self-assurance, I think, in these kinds of relationships. Link to comment
littleone22 Posted September 2, 2005 Share Posted September 2, 2005 I dont see a problem with it. I dated a guy for 2 years though that did begin to resent the fact that I was 11 years younger, and he started blaming things on me being so young. It just simply wasn 't true... if you two are into each other, and you get along, then the age difference will work itself out. But, if at any time he starts saying things like, "oh, you are too young to understand" then get out. It will only start to hurt your self esteem in the end, and make you try to be someone you are not Link to comment
younger 22 Posted February 17, 2006 Share Posted February 17, 2006 enjoy, take the opportunity, who knows there won't be one like this again.!!!!!!! Link to comment
younger 22 Posted February 17, 2006 Share Posted February 17, 2006 it's better to love than not love at all. Link to comment
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