Acting "aloof" around an EX

[tiki]

When I run into my ex, we casually say "hey" to each other as if we never had two and a half years of history. I act like I'm over it and that i don't care that i just saw him for the first time in months. I look calm, collected and cool as if the breakup never got to me. But looks can be very decieving--the truth is that seeing him made my day.

 

When it's almost time to go, I always make sure that I'm the one who leaves first so I don't have to watch him walk away. Instead, I'm the one who grabs my purse, head out the door, and have that great satisfaction of knowing that he's watching and wishing for me to stay longer.

 

It's all a front. I miss him terribly and i wish for nothing more than be able to say that to his face. I think he feels the same way but I'm not so sure. What if he's not just acting "aloof" around me and he's ACTUALLY over it. I let down my pride so many times for him in the past and I just can't do that anymore.

 

I'm just tired of all the games. I want to run up to him and give him the fattest hug whenever i see him.

 

"Hey" isn't cutting it for me anymore.

[Tigris]

He has to decide what he wants. I think what you're doing is good, keep doing it. Let him realise what he's lost.

 

If you do get back together don't assume to continue where you left off! Start from scratch and regain the trust.

 

Take care and look after yourself.

[Vert]

Tiki, I think this kind of behavior happens with each and every couple even though neither will admit it openly to one another or their friends. I know for a fact that I do it with my current ex-gf, but sometimes I don't want to see her in public for fear of seeing her hand-in-hand with a new guy. I think that would be a soul crusher even now (2 months post-break) so I'd rather avoid her altogether, aka "NC rule."

 

I have also learned that I can't worry about what she's thinking, what she's doing, or if she's feeling as I am. I just have to worry about bettering myself and looking forward, and that is what you need to do as well. Don't worry about if he's missing you because he probably is, but as I've also learned that doesn't mean the person wants you back. I miss college, but that doesn't mean I want to go back and do all the tests, homework, and sleepless nights again. Sure there were good times, but we all seem to forget the bad times. Just concentrate and better yourself first. If he comes around, then he comes around otherwise don't think about it.