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don't know whether to stay together or break up


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Iv'e known (bob) since last year, Junior year. We were

in one class together and saw eachother occasionally

during games at. I never ever ever thought of him

as a boyfriend, just as a friend that happened to be a boy.

 

This summer we decided to start hanging out, we went a

saw a movie, nothing happened, but I had the phycic

ability to be able to tell he wanted to hold my hand.

 

One thing that bugs me is that he doesn't drive, he had

his friend drive us. And thats not that big of a deal, but

I don't know, when we got to my myhosue. I made him

get out of the car and give me a hug. Just too be generous

and kind. He emailed me later asking me if i had a good time.

 

I emailed saying yes and all then he emailed me again saying

he wanted to pop the question. I thought of that as kind of cute.

I told him i just want to be friends right now and I'm still getting

to know him. Well the next date, we held hands and I gave him

a little kiss on the lips, >>he kisses like a wet fish

 

Okay so he took me too two more movies and after the last

movie he asked me out during the movie THROUGH TEXT MESSENGING

ON HIS CELLLLL PHONE!! that aggrevated me that he couldn't ask

out loud to me. I said yes, but now I'm not wanting to be with him

like that. I don't know what to do. I Broke plans with him yesterday

because I went to my friends place and went swimming, he called

and I told him that, then he got all quiet and said under his breath

thanks a lot!

 

I felt bad and said im sorry, but in reality I really jsut

am not feeling him. How can I break it to him that I'm not

diggin him that way? He wrote me an email on how much he

likes me and blah...But How do I do this with out really hurtin his

feelings or worse, putting our friendship on the line.

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By telling him the truth. However you tell him it is going to hurt him, particularly since you seem to have led him on to expect more than just a friendship.

 

'Making' him give you a hug, agreeing to go out with him when he texted you (seemed like a kinda cute way to do it to me BTW), going out with him twice more when you don't like the way he kisses and don't have feelings for him in that way is not very kind.

 

But he may have got the message already when you stood him up - perhaps he is a bit psychic as well.

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Unforunately his feelings will probably be hurt no matter how you say it, but I would recommend being honest. Tell him that you value your friendship and don't want to lose that. I definitely wouldn't stay with him out of guilt and it's best to let him know sooner rather than later. He may need a while to accept that nothing more than friendship will/can happen (at least at this point in time), but if he truly cares about you, he will come around and honor your feelings. Good luck to you!

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He cried yall!! He didn't seem very happy!

 

He told me he never stopped thinkin about me. He told me

that he respects my descision even tho he doesn't understand why.

We stayed on the phone for like 2 to 3 hours. I didn't think

he would take it as bad as he did, But he did. And he's still

wanting to be friends, but I told him I'd like to be friends with

him still, but don't yall thi nk that'll be hard for him to deal with?

 

I do think so. But yeah...I don't know. I'm feeling

better now that I broke up with him. But I also

feel wayy lousy.. And after him and I hung up. Me and

this dude I hooked up withbefore talked for like from

2 50am to like almost 6 am. we just talked and talked

and it seemed cool, but he reminds me of an ex. And hes from

cali! Yikes....But yeah

 

we made some plans today...he wants me to call up some

girlfriends and have him bring some friends and us just to go

swimmin and chill....so yeah...I feel like a horrible person right now.

Im thinking about inviting my ex, because I feel bad for him and he

doesn't have to work today!!

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Oh NO don't invite your ex to an event where you and this "new dude" are going to be together!

 

Don't send your ex mixed messages like that either, make it a clean break. And don't rub it in...which showing off with the "new dude" would do.

 

Give your ex time, and let HIM decide whether he can be friends or not once he is healed.

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