read help me!

[xixilovergirlxixi]

please read help me to understand what im writing.

 

 

to all who responded. I went back to him and he hit me again what should i do im still totally in love with him. hes still in consouling but i dont think it is working can someone help me im scared for me and my son!

[darkblue]

Leave him.

As I advised before.

Find family/friends to stay with. If you are so determined to make it work. He has to get rid of his problems first.

 

Leave him for now.

[xixilovergirlxixi]

my son. my son my son my son my son

[avman]

What about your son?

[smallworld]

my son. my son my son my son my son

 

Your son needs his mom to be strong enough right now to take him to a safe place away away from the violence. As much as it hurts you to be hit, it's much more terrifying and painful for your son to see you being hit.

 

Please Xixilovergirlxixi. Take Darkblue's advice and move in with family. Once you're safe, call your bf's counselor and let him/her know what's going on. You also need someone in your corner right now who understands exactly what you're going through. Please call the YWCA or your local women's shelter to speak to a counselor. They won't make you press charges or do anything you don't want to. They're there to listen and help you make the best decisions possible regarding you and your son.

[Softmoonlight]

darling, you're 15. you have a child. you're with a man who abuses you.

you don't live together i take it. leave now before you are stuck with this loser for life. read my post and realize what your life will be like in a few years.

 

he will NEVER change no matter how you alter your behaviors. there's nothing you can do that will make him not abuse you. no matter how perfect, quiet, good, kind, and honest you are, there is nothing you can do. there will always be some way that you fall short, something that you don't do to his expectations, something that you do that annoys him to the point of abuse. PERIOD.

 

he will never be a father to your child. he will never be the love that you need and deserve. men who are abusive never ever and I repeat...NEVER change. The mean/sweet cycle, the promises to change, the romance that ensues after an attack. believe me, i've been in this for 6 years now. and i'm not the happy, good, and kind person i once was.

 

you're still very young. can you see yourself living like this for the next 45 years? or are you, like me, so drained you can't think straight anymore?

 

if you aren't drained yet, you will be. soon everyday will be such a struggle that you will feel like death is moments away. you will dread coming home, dread living. don't do this to yourself.

 

it's time to come to grips with this situation.

God help us both.

[lunatic]

Ok listen your 15 and you already have a child. Right now the way it stands this kid hits you because he is too young to be a father. He is barely a man himself and he will continue to abuse you. Softmoolight is absolutely right when she states he will never change. He has to WANT to change it takes years of conditioning from him to control himself. Most abuses occur because the person doing the abuse comes from a household where abuse was common. Do you want your son to treat his future girlfriends and you like this jerk is treating you now?

 

I dont think so. GET AWAY FROM THIS ONE NOW.

 

Your both too young to have children and to be kids yourself. Now I will not lecture you on having a child so young. I think it is in the best interests of you and your son to get far far away from this kid. This is not a game and no matter how much you love this guy now your going to resent him for all the abuse one day. Trust me get away now. I hope this guy doesn't go to the same school as you because there maybe trouble with him there because you can never be completely away from him.

 

Please get away from this little boy NOW!

[btbt]

Yes, listen to the other posters and leave him right away. You may think you love him, but you don't. How can you love someone who hits you? That is not love, but fear (fear of leaving him? fear of security?).

 

As for your son, the best thing for him is to see his mother be strong and out of a bad relationship. Whether or not he sees you geing hit, children are very smart and they can sense that something bad is happening to you. So if you want him to grow up healthy, happy and into a man that knows how to respect women, leave this guy right away. It might be hard, but it won't be are hard as spending years and years being beaten. I wish you the strength and courage to get out of this.