argh help please

[samantha_uk]

why why cant i orgasm????? i have been with my boyfriend for over a year and i have not yet once experienced a orgasm. i try every thing nothing seems to work. i know as this is a forum bout orgasm you must get this message all the time but i would really appriciate some help i have had one sexual partner before and again no pervail! i try getting all the mod cons and i try different techniques! help i am only 18 i cant go on like this! also as my boyfriend is on holiday with the lads i am so sexually frustrated. i didnt realise how much sex was on t.v! ne way please post a reply!

[skinskinskin]

that sucks. you're just talking about during intercourse, right? or can you not do it for yourself???

i'm 26 and have only been able to orgasm with one guy! i don't know what it was that kept me from being able to with others; but personally, i feel like half is technique; the other half is the emotional part of sex.

i can tell you that you're not alone. i have 3 or 4 friends who never have.

[RayKay]

The more you worry about orgasming...the less likely you will be to have one. When you stress about it you raise levels of cortisol in your body, which tend to prevent orgasms by also restricting the blood flow to the vital areas.

 

Most women are able to first orgasm through clitoral stimulation, and penetration alone is not enough. Are you able to give yourself an orgasm? If yes, then show your partner what works and what does not with his fingers and/or tongue. If you have not, learn how to give yourself one with clitoral stimulation (with fingers, or buy a simple vibrator as well to help).

 

Use lots of foreplay, and lots of lubrication. Even if you are well lubricated naturally, extra lube can make things even more conducive to orgasms.

 

Women also tend to be able to orgasm longer, harder and more frequently as they get more comfortable with their own body and as they mature.

 

Remember sex is not just physical though too..many women find that though they have always had trouble orgasming with a partner suddenly discover that they meet a partner whom can get them there...if the emotional connection is down, the physical might be absent too.

 

And try not to stress so much about it, enjoy the intimacy of sex for the intimacy, it is not JUST about the orgasm. The more you enjoy the pleasure of sex even without an orgasm, the more likely it will be that you WILL have one.

[shorty20]

for me, I've only orgasmed when I was on top. first off, you have to be completley comfortable with you're partner. And they can help you to feel comfortable by giving you specific compliments...that are genuine and that will let you know they're not just feeding you a line, but are actually into you and are very attracted to you. I haven't been a virgin since I was about 16, but I didn't even orgasm during sex until I was 19. I think the major thing is being comfortable, but also staying focused... if your mind wanders, your not likely to orgasm... at least for me. If I stay focused I can orgasm alot harder and better and easier. Hope I helped a bit.

[summer_in_greece]

Why is it important to orgasm? Who cares if you don't have orgasms. Just enjoy the sexual experience and the wonder and magic of it. Sex is something special to be shared with someone you love, and it's being with the person that you love that matters, and not whether or not you have an orgasm.

[samantha_uk]

i do enjoy sex dont get me wrong. i enjoy the intermitcity. i just would like to push it that one stage further and orgasm. I can do it perfectly on my own. i just cant seem to do it in fore play or whilst having sex. i have lyed to my partner and told him that i have, because i feel that i would hurt his pride if he knew the truth.many men could get angry with me saying i lied but i dont no what to do? i dont no if any one else feel like this but you tend to think every women that has sex orgasms i know thats not the truth! but argh... what am i doing wrong

[Vert]

I was the first man to give my ex-gf an orgasm, apparently, and it was during intercourse. She hated letting me even remotely give her oral sex (remotely meaning I'd get a few seconds in and that'd be it), but I know she liked oral b/c she loved giving it to me, just never receiving it. My previous ex before her would only orgasm through oral, and had only one with intercourse.

 

Anyway, RayKay is right... if you think too much or stress too much, it'll never happen.

[djedix]

is it the same with guys? No matter what we try i can not get off when my g/f is ontop. I have in the past with other girls no problem, but i can't with my current g/f and i think she's bothered by it. She can every time, but i can't no matter what. maybe its a mental thing. I've gotten off in other pos, but just when shes ontop i can't.

[Stab Girl]

have your boyfriend look up ways to eat you out

 

after some research my boyfriend can have me climaxed in 5 minutes or less

 

its just a matter of communicating and telling him what feels good

 

like when hes eating you out, tell him what feels good, like when he does something that feels really goooooddd just say something or give him a moaning sign

 

maybe the A-Z tongue trick might work, its all in a matter of him trying things on you, but you gotta relax and enjoy it, don't think about it so much

[Stab Girl]

I havent had one through intercourse

 

but that should not matter

 

i mean if your partner and you want one then give it orally, either way it feels good no matter how it is given

 

in the end your still pleasuring eatchother