Ok, her phone is off so i sent this email...thoughts/advice?

[urbangentleman]

Was this an ok email to send without any pressure, or have i done the wrong thing here?

 

 

Hi ****** ,

 

how r u?.....It was good to see you the other day.

 

I was wondering if you could Please log onto link removed and sign up online to help support the G8 summit on July 6th when they will try an decide how to end poverty and death in the world once and for link removed's our chance to help make this a reality, the more support the better.

 

I was wondering if you would like to catch up sometime?

 

best wishes & thanks

 

****.

[wierdo]

i love you so much, i'm going to spam you.. bye

 

lol.. you've done nnothing wrong, just showed her that you care about someone other than yourself..

 

lol

 

you're funny, but in a cute way

 

lol

[heloladies21]

Yes you did do the wrong thing. I know your situation and everything she does (or doesn't do) screams "I'm not interested in you anymore". She's moved on. Just don't make the mistake of misinterpreting everything she says or does as her wanting to get back together with you ie. her responding to your email in a normal way meaning she obviously wants to get back together with you. Dumpees usually have a bad tendency to do this. She's going to have to make it very obvious to you that she wants to get back together with you, but I don't see any chance of that happening.

 

Just think about it, the email you sent, you could've used to send to some random chick online. Or when you met her recently you could've used that time to talk to some other chick. Go back into NC and stay in it this time so you can heal for real and work on finding someone else.

[smallworld]

I was wondering if you could Please log onto link removed and sign up online to help support the G8 summit on July 6th when they will try an decide how to end poverty and death in the world once and for all.

 

Brilliant! 8) Only one problem, I thought you were doing NC?

[urbangentleman]

Hi guys, thanks for your advice.

 

Helloladies....you seem to think i want to get backtogether with her, but really all i want now is to have her back in my life, and just being friends with her would be acceptable to me now.There is just no reason at all for us not to be, it's never been nasty netween us at all.That's why i reached out to see if atleast she wants this too.

 

to a certain degree i have healed, and am in control these days.

 

thanks for the response though.

 

Urb.

[benevolent]

Wow...bad idea. Sorry, but when I read that I said "what the bleep was that?" Was this meant to me a joke?

 

I think your ex is going to look at that e-mail and say that was pretty pathetic. Sorry, I don't mean to sound harsh. It's just that the letter screams out "I'm not over you and will do anything to get you back". I just think it sends the wrong message and will make her distance herself from you.

 

If you are doing NC, then you shouldn't be doing this at all. This is especially true if you are somewhat healed and in control. Wow, why does this make me feel like I'm writing to Danimal? Anyway, focus on the NC. Yes, it's tough, but if you are somewhat healed, then the battle is half won.

[heloladies21]

Hey friend, you got nothing to prove to me, i'm just some guy sitting behind a computer in a distant land, but everything you've done shows me you want her back and not just as a friend. Friend's with exes is never a good idea. Always hidden agandas. The dumper just want to ease their guilt about breaking up and the dumpee thinks it's a way to get their exes to see how great of a person they've become and will want them back.

 

Even girls who i've left on good terms with i'm not friends with. What would I get out of being their friends? Great company? More like a constant reminder of a failed relationship. There's just no point.

[Mr. Cactus]

I agree with Heloladies. You want her back and it comes through crystal clear in all of your posts the last few weeks. Just look for example at your reply to Heloladies. you said "just being friends would be acceptable to me now". Regardless of what you would have us believe, we can see that deep down you are nowhere near getting past this person. You really ought to take the advice that the majority of respondents have given you the last month or two and move on with full NC. The sooner you do that the sooner you will be in position to open your heart to someone else. But you've been told to do this again and again...but it just doesn't seem to sink in...

 

And Heloladies is right on the money as well when he says what would be the point of you being friends. It really is just an incessant reminder of what might have been. To me, you only want to be friends so you can hopefully work your way back up to relationship status.