De Militarized Zone Posted June 29, 2005 Share Posted June 29, 2005 I Have never bin this pissed in my life, I started talking to my Ex again online, then i called her and asked her if she would like to go for coffe she said she would love that. So when we went we talked and had a good time. She told me this new guy she is seeing sucks. She said he sucks at kissing, there is no feeling when they fool around(she does not sleep with him). And she misses everything that she had with me. She kept droping hints to me like. "I miss this" "There is no feeling with the other guy", "I miss your lips" etc. So when i brought her home we sat in the car and talked she said she notices all the changes in me and likes them. but she just won't come back to me i don't get it. Anyway later that night i was on MSN again and she wrote me and said i had a really great time i asked what was the best part of today she said being with me again. Well i called her today and kept telling her "let's get back together" and stuff but she just won't do it. She said she loves me. But what is holding her back, She said she needs to sort somthings out in her life first and that she needs time. BUT WHAT THE HELL DOES SHE WANT, why is she being so confusing, here i am pouring my heart out missing her, she is missing me and tells me all these nice things then she says she needs time. WHAT THE HELL. I just don't get it, Im pissed off, and meanwhile while "she is takeing her time" she is giveing head to that other guys she is seeing . People im lost, what should i do, And what the hell does she want. Link to comment
smallworld Posted June 29, 2005 Share Posted June 29, 2005 I can only guess, but here goes. Nothing is standing in her way of coming back to you. I know you love this woman, but what she's offering you isn't love, it's insanity. I want you, but I can't be with you??? Please! For your own sake NC her until she grows up and is willing to drop her bf and do what it takes to be with you and only you. Link to comment
reflectionlessmirror Posted June 29, 2005 Share Posted June 29, 2005 You can still see each other and enjoy your time together. Does it HAVE to be that you are together again? IF she really wants you instead she will end up coming back. Dont be pissed over it, you are making her happier than he is!? Link to comment
sweetheart4ever Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 OK 1st off do you love her or are you only wanting to get back for dumb reasons? 2nd, maybe she isnt givin him head, you just think that.and if she told you so then maybe she doesnt think that you really want her back and is "testing" you...see when it comes down to it, she either, doesnt want to get hurt again by gettin back with you or really cares about you and 1 doesnt want you hurt if it isnt right for her or 2 wants to make sure it is right for you both...if you really care, really love her want her back, you will wait, you will be calm, and considerate, deep down she is doing what seems to be the very right thing. so just understand that. Good luck! Link to comment
Hope75 Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 Bottom line: She won't give you what you want from her in terms of a relationship. Time to let her go. Don't call her, don't email, leave her alone. SHe is playing big time head games with you. She is with someone else, no matter how much she complains about him, her actions say different, she is still with him, and not with you. Enough is enough. Don't put yourself through this agony anymore. You asked her to get back together, she said no, end of story. Cut her from your life and move on. Good luck. Link to comment
heloladies21 Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 Well friend, sometimes people need time to figure things out, but this is not one of those situations. She's hanging with some other guy now and at this point it becomes a dead issue. Next step for you is to make the decision to move on for good and go No Contact cause what she feels for you is not strong enough for her to get up, dump that guy, and get back with you. When the right time comes, you'll take that step. Link to comment
drydupfob Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 Dude, I feel like she's playing you. Keeping you around until she finds someone better. Sorry to tell you this but I really believe this is wats going on. I had it happen to me a year back, and it sucks. I tihnk the best thing to do is either doing the same thing with her or get out completely. Why not date around like she is, if she's going off with other guys? Or if you feel like you u can't be in the situation without being effected emotionaly than get out of the situation. best of luck to ya bro Link to comment
Napoleon Bonaparte Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 What were the reasons the two of you broke up? Did either of you cheat? Did either of you lie? Was there any emotional abuse? How long were both of you together? I think I know the answer already and if I am right, everybody here is probably wrong. Link to comment
Napoleon Bonaparte Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 What were the reasons the two of you broke up? Did either of you cheat? Did either of you lie? Was there any emotional abuse? How long were both of you together? Who dumped who? I think I know the answer already and if I am right, everybody here is probably wrong. Link to comment
Hope75 Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 What were the reasons the two of you broke up? Did either of you cheat? Did either of you lie? Was there any emotional abuse? How long were both of you together? Who dumped who? I think I know the answer already and if I am right, everybody here is probably wrong. What's your theory? Link to comment
brando Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 DeMilitarized... back off and see what happens, dont contact her again... start dating others and enjoy your life... try not to push anything or look too needy or eager to get back together....it may be pushing her away... what are the circumstances of the breakup???? Link to comment
De Militarized Zone Posted June 30, 2005 Author Share Posted June 30, 2005 What were the reasons the two of you broke up? Did either of you cheat? Did either of you lie? Was there any emotional abuse? How long were both of you together? Who dumped who? I think I know the answer already and if I am right, everybody here is probably wrong. The reason we broke up was because, i expecting everything to come to me and was not willing to take the steps to make things happen, in other words i was lazy, anouther thing was we had different life goals, i have changed everything and she loves it. to answer you question yes she did cheat on me once and she regrets it, i did forgive her for it. We were together for two years, and she dumped me. Link to comment
Napoleon Bonaparte Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 What is her relationship history? Why did she say she cheated? Did she leave you for him? (this part doesn't matter as much). Would you consider her somebody with less self-esteem than yourself or more? My initial theory was wrong, however I can still think of several possibilities. So far though I must admit I am really starting to think she sounds despicably manipultive and self-centered and you might have be a bit controled by her. But I want more input before I give advice and make judgements. .......... The reason we broke up was because, i expecting everything to come to me and was not willing to take the steps to make things happen, in other words i was lazy, anouther thing was we had different life goals, i have changed everything and she loves it. to answer you question yes she did cheat on me once and she regrets it, i did forgive her for it. We were together for two years, and she dumped me. Link to comment
Napoleon Bonaparte Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 What is her relationship history? Why did she say she cheated? Did she leave you for him? (this part doesn't matter as much). Would you consider her somebody with less self-esteem than yourself or more? Did she talk about her sex life with this guy with you the last time you spoke? Did she say she gives this guy head? My initial theory was wrong, however I can still think of several possibilities. So far though I must admit I am really starting to think she sounds despicably manipultive and self-centered and you might have be a bit controled by her. But I want more input before I give advice and make judgements. .......... The reason we broke up was because, i expecting everything to come to me and was not willing to take the steps to make things happen, in other words i was lazy, anouther thing was we had different life goals, i have changed everything and she loves it. to answer you question yes she did cheat on me once and she regrets it, i did forgive her for it. We were together for two years, and she dumped me. Link to comment
De Militarized Zone Posted June 30, 2005 Author Share Posted June 30, 2005 What is her relationship history? Why did she say she cheated? Did she leave you for him? (this part doesn't matter as much). Would you consider her somebody with less self-esteem than yourself or more? Did she talk about her sex life with this guy with you the last time you spoke? Did she say she gives this guy head? My initial theory was wrong, however I can still think of several possibilities. So far though I must admit I am really starting to think she sounds despicably manipultive and self-centered and you might have be a bit controled by her. But I want more input before I give advice and make judgements. Dunno why she cheated she just regreted it very much and she always said she would never cheat,no she never left me for him, she is sombody with less self esteem than me, The sex life was she did everything except sex and we were both waiting for sex and never did it, she did not want to talk about her sex life with this new guy, she dose the same thing she did with me that she does with the new guy and she told me he sucks at it and she says there is no feeling in it when they do it. and yes head is part of it Link to comment
Napoleon Bonaparte Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 Last question. Relationship history: Did she have many boyfriends before you? Are you her first boyfriend? Has she ever been cheated on, abused, used, or dumped? Link to comment
Hope75 Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 Do you really think someone who cared about you and your feelings would be telling you in detail what she is doing sexually with someone else? Why are you still wasting your time on her? She is with someone else. She cheated on you. She then dumped you. Gather your self respect and get on with your life. Link to comment
De Militarized Zone Posted June 30, 2005 Author Share Posted June 30, 2005 Last question. Relationship history: Did she have many boyfriends before you? Are you her first boyfriend? Has she ever been cheated on, abused, used, or dumped? Nope i was her first boyfriend, and none of the other stuff Link to comment
Napoleon Bonaparte Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 De, I am inclined to agree with hope. She sounds terribly self-absorbed. She mentioned the sex because she is trying to manipulate jealousy. She is also currently denegrating somebody she is in sexual relations with. She has also cheated on you and persuaded you back and then dumped you because she didn't think you hadn't decided what to do yet with your future (bad reason) and now is trying to manipulate you into lusting over her by telling you things you shouldn't be hearing. I expected her to have self-esteem issues. She is going to manipulate you into pursuing her because you "not being into her anymore" makes her feel less desirable. I also think you have low self-esteem and I don't care what you say. You give it off and it makes you vulnerable to being controled by her. She might feel affection torwards you but that doesn't mean she cares about your feelings. Yeah I know it sounds weird but it does happen a lot. She is to worried about what she WANTS with minimal (if any) risk of rejection at the expense of your own feelings. I have a good idea of how you could seduce her back but i'd never suggest or advice it. Do you want that kind of immature spoiled child in your life again? You need to find somebody who cares how YOU FEEl as much or more than her own feelings. And I am curious where all these self-esteem problems she has and this total lack of empathy comes from -- however there are millions of (esp young) women like her out there. Ugg I hate those types of females. Link to comment
drydupfob Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 ya dude, bad deal you should really get out of the situation. Link to comment
Napoleon Bonaparte Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 He isn't going to. She controls him. Link to comment
drydupfob Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 Sometimes its the hardest thing to do, leaving someone that left you.... It sounds stupid but its just so hard at times. Link to comment
carolinacowboy81 Posted July 2, 2005 Share Posted July 2, 2005 Bud, she obviously has no character and (even worse) no regard for you whatsoever. Drop her like a bad habit and run because girls like her are nothing but worthless scumbags, and what's worse is that they give the female gender a VERY BAD NAME. Girls like her are as trustworthy as Rattlesnakes that have stepped on. Link to comment
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