Borderline Personality Disorder

[smorgie]

All has come clear.

 

I believe my Boyfriend/exboyfriend...whatever he is at the moment, has borderline personality disorder. Through my psychologist I'm seeing (because of my horrible relationship!!!!) he feels that my bf is.

 

Does anyone know anything about dealing with people like this? From what I hear, its really hard to get out of a relationship for good. I tried once quite very hard! It didn't work, and we pretty much got back together because it was just easier to do that, then to put up with his antics.

 

Is there anyone on here who has dealt with an ex with this? From what I hear 2% of the population has it, and 80% of those are female. Saying that, I would hope someone here could help me. Please, i'm at the end of my rope.

[Gilgamesh]

Let me get this staight, your staying with someone you dont get along with because its more of a hassle to be apart?

 

So you have decided you want to change who you are or try and "cure" him so you can live together in harmony!!

 

how many lives you have to live?

 

I suggest you find someone you love, loves you back, and be happy with.

 

your not going to "cure" this man, he can only seek out help when he is ready, and when he wants.

 

You are who you are, your going against what you know you want in life to force something into working no matter what! your wasting your time.

 

maybe your feeling sorry for him, or maybe your in love with the dream of what you wish he would become. but he isnt that person you set up in your mind, and he may never become that person.

 

now if you want to become a martyr and dedicate your life into trying to cure this man then go ahead, or if you just want to give up who you are and tolerate him, thats your choice too.

 

Your psychologist made his assessment only from what you have told him, only from your point of view. so as far as anyone is concerned who knows whats really up with him.

[smorgie]

My psychologist was our joint psychologist. I don't want to stay with my ex.

 

I am leaving him for good.

 

I was asking on information on this because from what I hear people with borderline personality disorder sometimes start stalking/threatening to kill themselves/hurt themselves etc. I was trying to find someone else who maybe has been through this before so i could get out of of this relationship with the least harm to the both of us.

[arwen]

Smorgie,

 

I know how difficult this can be. I have a friend who had a long long struggle to get out. I will ask her for more tips, and let her read your request if you want.

 

First of all, you need to find a psychologist or a social worker or SOMEONE that is just at YOUR side of this. You need counselling and guidance to deal with the manipulation you might feel from his side- him threatening with suicide and things like that.

 

Take care,

 

Ilse.

[smorgie]

thanks i would really apprieciate that, and the sooner the better!!!

[sunshine021204]

you make us sound like bad people. i have been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder in may 2005. and before yes some of the bad things i have done. n but i have not stalked anyone that iks for sure. my best advice would just let him believe your his friend and guide him through his "suicide attempts" they are not really attemps. well i hope not,

 

but please remember that we are not bad people we are people that need help surviving in this world we live in.

[btbt]

Don't fear his disease; help him get treatment for it. Yes, people with BPD have reactions to situations that might be frightening, but that doesn't mean he will definitely stalk you or kill himself. He needs help immediately.