bobster Posted June 19, 2005 Share Posted June 19, 2005 This may sound silly but I find myself still thinking of the girl I had a crush on over a year ago. Basically last year I was working in her shop doing some maintenance work and I sort of showed interest in her (I was kinda shy and didn't ask her out as such, but I left her my card). I visited the shop a couple of times since to talk to her which went ok but I got the impression she wasn't interested and I felt like a fool. So I left it and that was that. Just before Christmas I had to go back to the shop to do more routine maintenace. I was dreading seeing her but once I got advice on this site, I built myself confidence up and was able to go back. This time she was very flirty with me, no touching or anything just talking and joking. She played the whole "Dirty Dancing" CD and was getting me to sing to it (there was no public in). I was so determined to try and forget her and move on but this didn't help! I had to go back after New Year again, she was very flirty and even flirting infront of her colleague (who is very nice!). So I took the plunge and asked her to a show in town and she declined saying she was going with her parents but said "it was nice of me to ask me". SO again, I thought right then thats it I'm moving on. I have met her a couple of times since at the shopping centre and to be honest she seems really friendly towards me (more so than before). She "fits in" with my personality, like she is all polite in the shop but when I meet and talk to her in the street she is like "relaxed friend talk".I have noticed that she has asked "what am I doing tonight?" on both occasions.......is that a good sign???? When I returned the question, she said "oh nothing.......probably just having an early night". Can anyone give me clues on what to think or do? PS. sorry this is long Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 19, 2005 Share Posted June 19, 2005 Silly bob! It sounds like she likes ya! well, it's been a while, you never know if she's found someone new yet.... I think the next time you see her, ask her to do something with you over the weekend. Like, go to a festival, go to the new restaurant in town, or whatever.... good luck! Link to comment
Shidoshi Posted June 19, 2005 Share Posted June 19, 2005 I actually disagree. She's well aware of your interest in her, you've made an attempt to ask her out and she declined without offering an alternative. I say she likes the "attention" you give her and she doesn't want to take things any further. I say you move on unless she suggests going out. If I ask a girl out and she can't make it (if she likes me), she would definitely suggest we set something up for another day, she'll call or vice versa. Don't play her game and satisfy her need for an ego boost. The ball is in her court now. Link to comment
heloladies21 Posted June 19, 2005 Share Posted June 19, 2005 Yeah, you got rejected already. Focus your attention elsewhere because this is a dead issue. Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 19, 2005 Share Posted June 19, 2005 I have noticed that she has asked "what am I doing tonight?" Well, here's the thing, she may have reconsidered since the last time you asked her out. If she keeps asking you that, it seems like she's "fishing" for you to ask her out on the date. Now, I'm not sure, but if you've been hung up on her for 1 year and haven't been able to move on, I think it may be good just to ask her out one more time, and if she says no again, then forget about her forever. Link to comment
Shidoshi Posted June 19, 2005 Share Posted June 19, 2005 Quote: I have noticed that she has asked "what am I doing tonight?" Well, here's the thing, she may have reconsidered since the last time you asked her out. If she keeps asking you that, it seems like she's "fishing" for you to ask her out on the date. I see what you're saying but I stand by my advice. Why risk getting rejected twice? I think if she were interested (knowing you like her, especially after YOU asked her out) she would suggest a date. Don't give her the satisfaction of seeing how you still haven't gotten over her. For the most part, I say you move on because we as men have to initiate these things, and it's hard enough having to swallow your pride and make moves only to be turned down by a girl who was obviously flirting with you. Thank God they all aren't like that. If and only IF she asks you out should you give her any thought. Link to comment
bobster Posted June 19, 2005 Author Share Posted June 19, 2005 Thanks guys for your advice......I'm still not sure what to think or do Yeah, when I asked her out to a show and she said she was already going with her parents I was thinking to myself......that is really odd doing a thing like that at her age (I think she is 26). I was kind of waiting for an alternative suggestion......I was so taken aback by her answer that I didn't bother. Heres a thing, I heard from my colleague that she s going back to University for a year in August and is leaving the shop. Maybe I am just seen by her as some sort of ego-booster??? Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 19, 2005 Share Posted June 19, 2005 Heres a thing, I heard from my colleague that she s going back to University for a year in August and is leaving the shop. Is she leaving the shop only, or is she also moving far away? You know, last year, this guy from one of my classes asked me out for a saturday night. I turned him down because my mom and I were going to the symphony that night (The Truth!!!) My mom came from out of state to visit me, and I got tickets for us. And, actually, I wasn't interested in him, so no, I didn't make a counter-offer. But since, I've also tried to avoid him. If I see him around, I don't talk to him, or I might say hi, but that's it. So, what this girl is doing with her flirtiness, I don't know. Either she's reconsidered, or she's toying with you. Link to comment
bobster Posted June 19, 2005 Author Share Posted June 19, 2005 Is she leaving the shop only, or is she also moving far away? The Uni is on the other side of my country. My colleague said that she is being taken on holiday by her mum n dad as a treat before she goes to Uni........again its kind of strange eh? But since, I've also tried to avoid him. If I see him around, I don't talk to him, or I might say hi, but that's it. So, what this girl is doing with her flirtiness, I don't know. Either she's reconsidered, or she's toying with you. Yeah Annie, my experience is that once rejected, you are usually avoided by the person.......hell I've even hidden from girls that asked me that I didn't want to date! Could she be shy or what? Or maybe she is a mummy's n daddy's girl? She is really really nice otherwise I wouldn't give her the time of day. PS. all my colleagues prefer the other girl in the shop! Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 19, 2005 Share Posted June 19, 2005 Well, she's obviously close with her parents, but that doesn't answer the question of whether or not she's interested in you.... And if she's shy... I don't see why she would keep talking to you. Doesn't it seem like the shy type would rather run away? Link to comment
embers rise Posted June 20, 2005 Share Posted June 20, 2005 Maybe she's just family oriented? I say give it one more shot, what've you got to lose? If you don't you'll probably end up regreting it. Link to comment
bobster Posted June 20, 2005 Author Share Posted June 20, 2005 yeah, thinking about the last time I was in the shop working, she made me a cup of tea and while doing so said to the other girl "he's so nice" and I replied "who is?" and after a considerable pause said "Jim.....the delivery driver" (who is about 55-60) and I was like "ah right, yeah he is a nice guy" as I know him. I'm trying to think of what else she said....... She always asks about my hobbies (I'm involved in several clubs). Maybe she is toying with me and maybe I have been rejected...but it doesn't feel like it should??? Her workmate walked passed my van today while I was having lunch and sid in the window "you not doing any work today??" when I replied "no" she just laughed and said "lazy boy". Then when she came back she said "you still not doing anything?" I said "yes, reading the paper.....you want to join me?" she replied as she walked away "I wish I could" and laughed. (her boss is quite strict on the old time keeping). Maybe I should wait till the girl goes to Uni and go after her friend???? Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 21, 2005 Share Posted June 21, 2005 er.... well buddy... this is 100% your decision to make.... whichever one you think you'd be better off with..... good luck! Link to comment
bobster Posted June 21, 2005 Author Share Posted June 21, 2005 Thanks for all your advice! and cheers annie24 for that!! 8) Link to comment
bobster Posted June 24, 2005 Author Share Posted June 24, 2005 yeah, I was just thinking.....should I go back to the shop or wait until I'm sent to work there again? Shold I force it? Link to comment
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