Advice Needed!!!

[scorpio949799]

I am in my first relationship with a woman (I have always dated guys) and I also have 3 children ages 11, 8, and 6, I want to tell my family about her, but i dont know how. I really care about my girlfriend and she wants to meet my family and i want her to meet them, but i feel like I should talk to them and let them know. My other problem is my father, a very religious man, who really believes it is wrong (he wont even acknowledge his gay brother) and I am scared that wont take it very well. What do I do???

[shorty20]

if you're family loves you, they will respect the fact that you are a grown up and are making your own decisions, and they will accept you for who you are. In my opinion, I think I'd rather have my family know whats going on with me and with my life than be living a lie so I can be who they want me to be... if they don't accept you right away, I would give them time... chances are they will come around...

[Cadence308]

shorty gave some great advice. I think it would be hard introducing a lover of the same sex to your family and esp. a parent who is homophobic. She wants to meet your family and will be hurt if you don't allow her to. I think you should warn her of what you think the outcome will be. I would also forewarn your family that they are about to meet your lesbian lover and maybe give them a few weeks to digest the information before they actually meet her.

 

Ultimately, you have to be yourself and who you choose to love is a part of who you are and to deny that would tear you in two. So I think that your family will either need to accept you or not be a part of your life because they don't deserve you if they can't accept you for who you love.

[NoMoreSunshine]

I have a fairly homophobic family. I love them very much, but the truth hurts sometimes... ha!

 

The long and short is that we found my mom again about 7 yrs ago. At the time she was out and married to a wonderful woman. Best relationship she'd ever been in. Suffice it to say my family the good Catholics and Southern Baptists (sorry no offense meant! how they see themselves..) that they are, they rejected her. Well 2 years later she died. (last friday marked 5 yrs ) Of course they sung her praises and patted themselves on the backs for how much they loved her...yeah right.

 

Fast forward a couple of years (3 yrs ago now)...I got a divorce, moved to TX and started a new life, and you guessed came well actually back out. They hated it! My aunt, here in town with me gave me lots of grief over my first girlfriend here. Then when I got with the now ex she slowly accepted it. It just took time and some spoon feeding. She has even gone to one of the gay bars in town with me a few times.

 

Just take it slow and know that people take time to adjust. Ok, I'll shut up now! Good Luck!