I hate this ***ing society

[Angel56656]

I am last year of high school and I ***ing hate society, I am a pretty extroverted guy and I have a wonderful relationship with everybody, but I hate people, it’s just the truth, I have how they all think their better than everybody else, how biased and stupid they are, they don’t know compassion or objectivity, they’re out there bragging about their life on instagram and all think they live the best life of the world, while it’s evident that other people with less friends and with less status(if you wanna ***ing name it that way) are way better.

Last year I started hanging out with those kinds of people(who are actually good guys, only that they start to behave like “instagram people” when we are in group) and saw a glance of what their life was, and it was truly terrible, so I decided to *** them and don’t even hang out with them anymore, since my life in that period was truly miserable.

i have so much hate for those kind of people, who think are better than everybody else, just because of this this and that……

this usually goes from having a girlfriend, to having a car, or money they didn’t earn, or cool friends they secretly hate. 

how can they keep living like that? I just want to *** them off, I have a couple of friends that aren’t very attractive but are quite fun and chill, but they’re looked at as creep or virgins that will never get any girl, as if they were able to get some model.

i don’t know what to say, whenever i get into class I always feel judged, since I know that if they make fun of my friends why wouldn’t they make fun of me too? I am so fed up with this *** that I plan to move to the US next year or even better, to my own country…

how can I survive without going mad this last year of high school, remember that I still have a great relationship with all my classmates, it just bothers me to have those people that probably consider me a creep, just because I usually hang out with people who are not that attractive or popular

 

[MissCanuck]

Kindly, you could probably do with some counselling. 

Your threads are going in circles about how you don't feel good enough, how angry you are at the world, how frustrated you feel. A decent professional can help you untangle all these thoughts and guide you in a healthier direction, so your anger doesn't consume you. 

[Angel56656]

1 minute ago, MissCanuck said:

Kindly, you could probably do with some counselling. 

Your threads are going in circles about how you don't feel good enough, how angry you are at the world, how frustrated you feel. A decent professional can help you untangle all these thoughts and guide you in a healthier direction, so your anger doesn't consume you. 

I tend to exaggerate a bit I just need to have some ways to cope with those toxic people 

[MissCanuck]

2 minutes ago, Angel56656 said:

 just need to have some ways to cope with those toxic people 

What exactly are they doing to you?

[Seraphim]

Just avoid people you don’t have an affinity for . 

[TeeDee]

Try to remember who they are ITL as opposed to who they pretend to be on line.    Listen to a Brad Paisley song called Online.   It's about a short guy who lives with mom & dad & works fast food but on line he claims to be 6'5 & drive a Masarati 

[Angel56656]

2 hours ago, MissCanuck said:

What exactly are they doing to you?

Well nothing, but I feel they are talking *** behind my back, since they do it with everybody, even between themselves 

[MissCanuck]

39 minutes ago, Angel56656 said:

but I feel they are talking *** behind my back

But you don't know this for a fact. 

Don't stress over hypotheticals. It's wasted energy. 

[extrox]

2 hours ago, Angel56656 said:

Well nothing, but I feel they are talking *** behind my back, since they do it with everybody, even between themselves 

When I was younger, in my early teens, I also felt that way. Once I was at a camping site taking a shower after a long beach day and, while there were two english guys talking to each other. They were open showers so they could see me and I could see them. Just like you, I made my mind that they were talking about me and my body. The fact that they were laughing a lot confirmed (in my mind) what I was thinking.

With the shower noise I couldn't understand what they were talking about but it didn't prevent me, as I was leaving, to tell them "SHUT THE **** UP!"🤣

You should have seen their face, completely confused and with incredulous faces. Today, as I remember the scene I understand that they reaction was the confirmation that I made a sad decision.😁

[Cherylyn]

Well join the club.  I don't like society either.  However,  I pick and choose whom to associate with whether it's local family,  in-laws,  best friends from childhood or friends whom I've grown to enjoy being with during adulthood.  It's a big world out there and you don't have to be with everyone.

I too am disgusted with a lot of people but not everyone is this way.  There are solid characters out there who know how to behave like very moral,  decent human beings.   They are few and far between but they definitely exist. 

Create healthy boundaries for yourself,  learn to be selective,  very picky and choosy.  It's what I've done and it feels safe and very secure.  Listen to your gut instincts.  Never go along to get along because it doesn't work and it's a fake,  phony way to behave.  Stay true to yourself always and you'll be glad you did.  🙂 👍  Do what makes sense. 

[Tinydance]

Honestly I get how you feel and I think unfortunately this is how a lot of young people behave these days. I'm nearly 40 so when I went to school we barely had computers or internet, let alone ang social media or apps. I did actually say to a friend that it seems that many young people these days are really obsessed with social media and how they present themselves. And that everything in life needs to be about that.

However, while we barely had computers while I was at school, we definitely still had bullies, popular and unpopular people, and so on. And I wasn't popular so I can definitely relate. But the good news is once you finish school it gets MUCH better.

At school you don't really have a choice of people who are in your classes. You're just presented with people who are there and your only choice is to be friends or be a loner. But once you finish school you actually get so much choice who to be friends with and who to be around. At university there are so many people and you don't need to sit next to anyone you don't like or talk to anyone you don't like. And you can even join extra curricular clubs and activities where you can meet people who aren't even in your classes. 

Same thing with work. As people get older they don't usually bully classmates or colleagues. If they don't like you, they usually just act polite and get on with their day. Outside of work or university you don't need to associate with anyone that you don't want in your life. Also the more people you meet in life the more you realise that most people are actually good. I think at school you only see certain people day in, day out. And you don't know what else is out there. But there are billions of other people out there.

[lostandhurt]

I think your first thread leads you into this type of thinking.  I have heard people say (even myself) "I don't care what anybody thinks" when in truth we all care to some extent don't we?  If we focus to much on it then it can tear us down and skew our view.  It seems like you haven't developed a good filter yet to weed out the crap and unhelpful.

 I do agree if you get bombarded enough by society it can sour you on everything because mostly negativity is pushed because it gets attention and clicks.  As humans we remember bad things way better than good.  Sad but true.  Ask any older person their most memorable vacation and most will recall the one where all hell broke loose or some sort of catastrophe happened.

  How much time do you spend on social media a day?

Lost

 

[Angel56656]

10 hours ago, Tinydance said:

Honestly I get how you feel and I think unfortunately this is how a lot of young people behave these days. I'm nearly 40 so when I went to school we barely had computers or internet, let alone ang social media or apps. I did actually say to a friend that it seems that many young people these days are really obsessed with social media and how they present themselves. And that everything in life needs to be about that.

However, while we barely had computers while I was at school, we definitely still had bullies, popular and unpopular people, and so on. And I wasn't popular so I can definitely relate. But the good news is once you finish school it gets MUCH better.

At school you don't really have a choice of people who are in your classes. You're just presented with people who are there and your only choice is to be friends or be a loner. But once you finish school you actually get so much choice who to be friends with and who to be around. At university there are so many people and you don't need to sit next to anyone you don't like or talk to anyone you don't like. And you can even join extra curricular clubs and activities where you can meet people who aren't even in your classes. 

Same thing with work. As people get older they don't usually bully classmates or colleagues. If they don't like you, they usually just act polite and get on with their day. Outside of work or university you don't need to associate with anyone that you don't want in your life. Also the more people you meet in life the more you realise that most people are actually good. I think at school you only see certain people day in, day out. And you don't know what else is out there. But there are billions of other people out there.

Ok, the thing is that I am pretty popular but I don’t want to still live in a place like that and hang around with people like that

[Angel56656]

7 hours ago, lostandhurt said:

I think your first thread leads you into this type of thinking.  I have heard people say (even myself) "I don't care what anybody thinks" when in truth we all care to some extent don't we?  If we focus to much on it then it can tear us down and skew our view.  It seems like you haven't developed a good filter yet to weed out the crap and unhelpful.

 I do agree if you get bombarded enough by society it can sour you on everything because mostly negativity is pushed because it gets attention and clicks.  As humans we remember bad things way better than good.  Sad but true.  Ask any older person their most memorable vacation and most will recall the one where all hell broke loose or some sort of catastrophe happened.

  How much time do you spend on social media a day?

Lost

 

Man literally zero, I don’t have even YouTube, in fact I use only my computer and only for study or work.

the problem I have is on person, with fake people on real life

[Batya33]

27 minutes ago, Angel56656 said:

Ok, the thing is that I am pretty popular but I don’t want to still live in a place like that and hang around with people like that

When you say popular are these superficial relationships or relationships of substance and depth? Do you have a place of worship? Often those places have events and activities for people your age where you're far more likely to meet people who are focused less on superficial popularity stuff and more on meaningful stuff.

[MissCanuck]

1 hour ago, Angel56656 said:

the problem I have is on person, with fake people on real life

You can't control how other people live their lives. 

All you can do is avoid people whose behaviour and choices you don't agree with. 

[Angel56656]

1 hour ago, Batya33 said:

When you say popular are these superficial relationships or relationships of substance and depth? Do you have a place of worship? Often those places have events and activities for people your age where you're far more likely to meet people who are focused less on superficial popularity stuff and more on meaningful stuff.

I should say relationships of dept and funny jokes, when we talk deeply about life and *** like that, yet still if I have to go to school every single day, I either talk with them of just don’t interact with anyone 

[lostandhurt]

1 hour ago, Angel56656 said:

the problem I have is on person, with fake people on real life

That is perfect then.  Have you ever heard the saying "It is mind over matter?"  In my life they I don't mind because they don't matter.  You are giving these people to much importance in your life.

For example:  If I meet someone or if someone is in my life bubble and they are selfish, mean, racist or any other negative trait I simply mute them from my life.  If I cannot avoid them like they are a coworker then they get the absolute minimum of my time and attention, if they are an acquaintance I just don't go around them, if they are a store clerk I go into the other line.  

 The problem here is you are giving "society" to much power over you and your emotional state.  This goes back to your first post where you gave your power away for your future to other peoples opinions.  It is great to get opinions but ultimately you have to chart your own course.  I kind of feel you were seeking validation more than advice and when you didn't hear what you wanted you turned sour.

 You are wiser than your age which can be a good thing and bad. Read my signature below over and over again.  It is the serenity prayer.  I have a framed copy on my dresser and read it often to help keep me focused on what is really important, not the mounds of crap that invade our life bubble each and every day.

Lost

[Batya33]

17 minutes ago, Angel56656 said:

I should say relationships of dept and funny jokes, when we talk deeply about life and *** like that, yet still if I have to go to school every single day, I either talk with them of just don’t interact with anyone 

Ok. My sense is you’re not ready to do what it takes to make some changes. When you are you will even small ones. 

[Angel56656]

21 minutes ago, lostandhurt said:

That is perfect then.  Have you ever heard the saying "It is mind over matter?"  In my life they I don't mind because they don't matter.  You are giving these people to much importance in your life.

For example:  If I meet someone or if someone is in my life bubble and they are selfish, mean, racist or any other negative trait I simply mute them from my life.  If I cannot avoid them like they are a coworker then they get the absolute minimum of my time and attention, if they are an acquaintance I just don't go around them, if they are a store clerk I go into the other line.  

 The problem here is you are giving "society" to much power over you and your emotional state.  This goes back to your first post where you gave your power away for your future to other peoples opinions.  It is great to get opinions but ultimately you have to chart your own course.  I kind of feel you were seeking validation more than advice and when you didn't hear what you wanted you turned sour.

 You are wiser than your age which can be a good thing and bad. Read my signature below over and over again.  It is the serenity prayer.  I have a framed copy on my dresser and read it often to help keep me focused on what is really important, not the mounds of crap that invade our life bubble each and every day.

Lost

THIS, I did realise that I seek too much validation(even tho in my post i was seeking information since it was something incredibly important therefore I thought it was worth worrying about it) can you give me some ideas on how to stop seeking validation from others?

I also everytime search and hope that people would tell me that I am funny extroverted and attractive, and many people had said this but unfortunately my mind always seek this, and I want to stop doing that

can you give me some trick to stop?

[lostandhurt]

3 minutes ago, Angel56656 said:

I also everytime search and hope that people would tell me that I am funny extroverted and attractive, and many people had said this but unfortunately my mind always seek this, and I want to stop doing that

Welcome to the club young man.  We all want to be liked for various reasons.  Some want to be the hero, some the funny guy, some the smartest one in the room while others put their self worth totally on how attractive they are.  You are no different than many of us even at three times your age.

 I wish I could give you some magic thoughts or phrases but there simply are not any.  I have a 25 year old son that is disabled that I  worked hard teaching him his disability does not define him, who he is inside does.  With all my dad words of encouragement, mentoring and all the rest it really always came down to him and this comes down to you. 

My best advice is to lean on your strengths.  Dress and look your best and accept that you like the way you look.  Make choices for your life on your interests and ambitions that make you happy and excited. Find your type of humor that is uplifting, not humor from others pain or suffering. 

This is a life long journey I am afraid with all of us at different points along the way with different destinations. 

You need to be 17 a little more and figure this stuff out as time goes by.  You want all the answers right now which is like drinking from a fire hose, to much to fast.

Lost

[catfeeder]

6 hours ago, Angel56656 said:

Ok, the thing is that I am pretty popular but I don’t want to still live in a place like that and hang around with people like that

Yet you want to move to LA CA? Honey, you'll need to grow a thicker skin.

On 11/25/2024 at 9:19 AM, Angel56656 said:

...I ha[t]e how they all think their better than everybody else, how biased and stupid they are, they don’t know compassion or objectivity,...

It's often the people who are hardest to love that actually need the most love. 

Wouldn't a compassionate and objective person recognize that those who are insecure and hostile enough to put down anyone else while they brag about themselves demonstrate that they are hurting and could use some of YOUR compassion and objectivity? 

It makes no sense to hate other people for exactly what you are secretly doing to them in your own mind.

Don't allow yourself to get caught up in a hate cycle. Hating people for hating only amplifies hate, and it's certainly no way to launch your future aspirations that will require you to deal with all kinds of people who hold varying degrees of the stuff you despise.

Whenever hate is projected it only speaks of self hatred. If you want to heal, start with self forgiveness for all of your human imperfections, and challenge yourself to extend that same generosity to others, no matter who they may 'appear' to be.

[ShySoul]

On 11/25/2024 at 6:19 AM, Angel56656 said:

I have how they all think their better than everybody else, how biased and stupid they are, they don’t know compassion or objectivity, they’re out there bragging about their life on instagram and all think they live the best life of the world, while it’s evident that other people with less friends and with less status(if you wanna ***ing name it that way) are way better.

saw a glance of what their life was, and it was truly terrible, so I decided to *** them and don’t even hang out with them anymore, since my life in that period was truly miserable.

i have so much hate for those kind of people, who think are better than everybody else, just because of this this and that……

People who are like that shouldn't be hated. They should be pitied.

They are caught up in childish games. They are insecure and judgemental. They will never be truly happy because they will always be comparing themselves to others and chasing superficial things. They will never feel content enough in their own life to just live their own life and let others live theirs. 

People are the same regardless of age. What I've noticed is that the people who feel the need to brag or put others down, really don't have the best self esteem or that good of a life in general. They have to boost themselves up higher then they really to make themselves feel important, feel like they have done more then they have. And the easiest way to do that is to tear someone else down.

Don't hate these people. Hate stains your soul, drags you down to their level. Turn the other cheek. Love them and wish them well, hoping they will one day see the error of their ways. Then associate with people who are better. Be around those who act out of love, respect, and compassion - qualities that mean far more then anything else.

Love the sinner, hate the sin.

On 11/25/2024 at 6:19 AM, Angel56656 said:

I have a couple of friends that aren’t very attractive but are quite fun and chill, but they’re looked at as creep or virgins that will never get any girl, as if they were able to get some model.

i don’t know what to say, whenever i get into class I always feel judged, since I know that if they make fun of my friends why wouldn’t they make fun of me too? I am so fed up with this *** that I plan to move to the US next year or even better, to my own country…

It's not better in the US.

It's not about age. It's not about where you are at. There are these kinds of people everywhere. It all comes down to individual choice. It comes down to the kind of person you choose to be. If you don't like those kinds of people, don't be like them. Associate yourself with better. Truly good people who get you are rare. But they are out there. And they are worth it.

Attractivness is subjective. And what is truly attractive is what is on the inside. Those people put down often turn out to be the best people. And in the end, they turn out happier.

[ShySoul]

On 11/25/2024 at 9:13 AM, Angel56656 said:

Well nothing, but I feel they are talking *** behind my back, since they do it with everybody, even between themselves 

They probably are. People who do that about one person have no problem doing it about anyone.

Really though, who cares? Why should the opinions of self centered and judgmental people really matter? It's not important. External validation isn't as important as what we think and feel about ourselves. As long as you know who you and are striving to be the kind of person you want to be, then there opinions aren't important. Believe in yourself and no one can touch you.

You don't need counselling. You don't need these kinds of people. What you need is to stop worrying about small, petty people who don't matter in the scheme of things and to focus more on being you and being with people who fully understand and get you.

[SirJumpy]

What people think of you doesn't matter. People think what they think. It usually has nothing to do with you.

Ignore them.

What do you think of yourself? What do those good people mentioned think? 

Listen to that.