cassiana Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 How can you tell if a man loves you or if you are just wasting your time? Link to comment
annie24 Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 Do you feel loved? Does he do nice things for you - not necessarily flowers and chocolates, but does he help you do things around the house? Is he there for you? Does he tell you he loves you? Link to comment
punchy504 Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 How can you tell if a man loves you or if you are just wasting your time? HOw long have you been with him? Have you guys talked about the future? Does he include you in major life decisions? Do you include him in major life decisions? Link to comment
dw_rc...Confused Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 Go with your gut instinct. You should really be able to tell if he loves you. All men are different so they don't all behave the same way when they're in love. Link to comment
cassiana Posted June 13, 2005 Author Share Posted June 13, 2005 No i'm single at the moment. I thought my ex loved me but he didn't. I was just looking for pointers that I wouldn't be fooled again. Yes he was nice to me, but that's no indication. Link to comment
loveydovey Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Well, first of all you have to have a foundation of trust and friendship. From that will come strong feelings of fondness that you will both feel. After that has developed, the love will come naturally. You may not be able to tell directly from his words, but you will see it through his actions. If he is genuinely concerned about your well being; if he wants to see you succeed; if he doesn't want anyone or anything to cause you pain; if he genuinely shows you respect--not just because he feels he has to, but because he can't help BUT give respect to the woman he adores.....then I'd say it's true love Link to comment
BillyJean714 Posted June 16, 2005 Share Posted June 16, 2005 It's really hard to tell. What seems to be true is sometimes not. A person can sweet talk the hell out of you, put up a front, and 'act' like they're in love when they're not. Based on my past experiences, when a person loves you it's unconditional. People can argue all they want about how unconditional love is impossible to experience with someone else besides their own children/family members. I think that's b.s. If a person says you can't describe love, to me, either: 1. They haven't truly loved before. -OR- 2. They're B.S.-ing. Love is love. It's unconditional. When a person loves you, every little action shows that they love you. For instance, when your parent loves you, they love you unconditionally. When your partner loves you, they will not only treat you like blood (family) but even more special: a Best Friend. The love that they give is and should not be limited. Meaning, no matter what they do, they make damn sure that they show you that they are serious and completely into you. Here are things to consider when evaluating whether or not the person you are with is serious about you and is in love: #1. The Look of Love- Does he have that look of love? Does it show in his eyes that he's in love and sincerily loves you? You can tell if someone's in love with you by the way that they look at you. Not in a way that you feel like you're a piece of meat, but in a way that he genuinely cherishes/adores you. 2. Actions- Does your partner commit to his promises? Or does he say crap and never do what he supposedly intended to do? When someone is sincere with you, they just don't sit there and make false promises. They take ACTION without you having to ask. Remember: Love is given and not asked for... 3. Photos- A person can lie through their teeth by telling you that they love you when they don't. But when it comes to photos you can tell if someone truly is in love with you by looking at their facial experessions in the photos that you take together. Does he have a full on smile? Are there wrinkles around his eyes? When someone is genuinely smiling in photos, their facial muscles show it! Ever look at politicians? Notice how they look all constipated with their fake/plastered smiles? Our facial muscles are extremely sensitive to how we feel from within! So, do a photo test. Does he seem sincerily happy in his photos? Or are his smiles kinda weak? It could be that he's insecure with his looks, but REGARDLESS: If he's happy with you, it will show through photos that you take together. And, we all can intuitively read gestures, we know when someone's genuinely happy and smiling vs. when they're smiling just to 'act' happy. 3. All the Little Things Count- It's the little things that a person says or does that say a lot, simple gestures show if a person truly loves you. For instance, is this person considerate? Do they make sure that you're well taken care of? Does he put you on a pedalstool? Do you feel pampered and adored? Sentiments- Is this person sentimental? Do they do little romantic things for you? Surprises? Cards? Flowers? Oil changes? Fix your computer? Cook dinner? Do they plan/follow through on weekend trips? 4. Teasing/Seriousness- Too much teasing is not good, could be that the person who you're with is a phony and not taking the relationship seriously. However, teasing also is a good thing(but not when it goes overboard and happens all of the time). Teasing is a sign of flirting. So when your partner teases you, even after an X amount of years of being together, then that's a good sign because it shows that they are into you and that the passion is still there. If the teasing/flirting dies out it's not a good sign. Along with teasing there has to be a level of seriousness that your partner shows you. That seriousness is: #1- Always concerned of your well-being. If a person teases you too much but lacks showing concern about your well-being, they're not taking you seriously. Being concerned should include making sure that you are always safe and protected in ANY & EVERY situation. 5. Questions/Quailty of Conversations- How is the quality of your conversations? Does it lack depth? Questioning goes hand in hand with quality conversations. A person who questions is a person who is interested in getting to know you. If your partner is deeply interested in finding out about who you are at heart, he will earnestly ask you questions that are important and will not talk about superficial stuff all of the time. Instead, he'll ask questions about your passions, interests, values, beliefs, family, hobbies, goals, # of children you want, career etc. He wants to explore everything about you. Quality conversations also include your partner sharing his weaknesses/insecurities with you. He confides in you because he ultimately considers you his best friend, someone who he trusts and respects enough to honor your thoughts/emotions. He turns to you and includes you in his decisions because he values your intellegence and everything that you are at heart. Never EVER settle for someone who shows you anything less than that! NEVER. Anyway, it's getting kinda late, but this is what I can think of so far. All in all, it's the non-verbal gestures + quality of the converstations which reveal the seriousness of his love towards you. I found an interesting read the other day on non-verbal gestures on "Sleeping Styles" and the quality of a couple's relationship. For instance, when a couple falls asleep together, if they hold each other (i.e. spooning or hugging face to face) it shows that sign that they are both in love and the quality of their romance is strong. Does your partner sleep in his own corner, or does he always try to cuddle with you? If your partner is feeling you, he will hold you in bed at least show affection and hug you all throughout at night. Even if both partners are old fogies, they still would at least hold each other's hands in bed. We don't think about our actions when we sleep. Our non-verbal gestures show everything. That's another thing to consider. It's nice to know that someone adores you even when they're asleep! There are so many things that a partner does to show that they love you. Most importantly, if your partner puts effort into the relationship, he takes you seriously. It's up to you to see if their efforts are sincere or not. Lastly, whatever they do should never be half-assed. If it's halfassed, then I say, their actions aren't sincere. I'm basing everything that I mentioned on my past experiences. Anyway, if your man is being halfassed/selfish and is conditional/limiting with his love, it's time to let him go and realize that you will find someone who treats you like gold and you treat that person the same, vice-versa. If he doesn't show you the love and respect that you deserve, drop him like a sack of crap and be happy that you didn't waste another day with him! Anyway, hope this helps! Link to comment
ladyluck Posted June 21, 2005 Share Posted June 21, 2005 it's difficult but you can tell if you really focus on vibes you get from him i'm right now with a guy that is really falling hard for me. he misses me after two whole days of no seeing eachother. he'd rather cuddle and i've known him since 7th grade and he's not the type of guy who preffers to cuddle and i'm not a cuddle kind of girl but he wants to so i do Link to comment
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