Do I block or delete his number

[Catlady15]

We went on a date last weekend and I know he’s not for me and don’t want to see him again.  I don’t know if I should just delete or block his number? I know I’ll have to see him at some point as he comes into my place of work. Also I’m not sure what to say when I do see him? 

[Batya33]

No need unless he harasses you. Just be polite and professional 

[Cherylyn]

If you don't want to keep his number,  don't keep his number.  Since both of you work at the same place,  remain natural,  nice yet safely distant and professional.  You can quietly delete and block his number without making any type of announcement whether in writing or verbal.  Just do it silently. 

[yogacat]

Why would you have to block him?

Is he blowing up your phone or something?

The last time I went on a date with someone I was not romantically interested in and he asked me at the end of the date for a second date, I replied that I do not have any romantic inclinations towards him and wished him well. And, that was that...

You mentioned thinking he is only after one thing (sex I am assuming...). Has he even asked you out for 2nd date? Is he pestering you where you feel the need to block him?

If he asked you out for 2nd date, why not just tell him you don't think you guys have any romantic compatibility after giving the date a thought?

Unless of course he's a groper and pushy then sure, block away!

[Kwothe28]

I think lots of people just lacks communication skills. That is why they reach for easy solutions such as “block”. Its easy to block somebody in the virtual life. In the reality, you would still have to see that person sometimes so it makes  very awkward moments. 

For example, why not just telling him that you dont want to see him again in a romantic sense? That you dont want to date him anymore? If he is rude after that, yes, by all means, block. But think its much better to practice your communication skills and dont just reach out for most easiest solutions possible not to talk to somebody.

[Batya33]

OP I blocked emails etc (I didn't have a cell phone when I dated!) if I told the person nicely I wasn't interested in going out again and he sent offensive emails. This happened a couple of times. Then I blocked -no need to respond to offensive rude emails or to have to receive them.

[TeeDee]

Leave it be for right now.  After you see him again then you can see how it goes.  You want it in your phone to make sure you know it's him & not to pick up in the short term.  Once you are sure he is not going to pester you then you can just delete.  At that point, there is no reason to block because he won't call. 

I suspect when you see him since it's been a few dates since the date, it will be a co-exist thing.  You can be polite & civil.  You will both sort of not talk about it, like it didn't happen & life will go on.  No fuss no muss. 

[Coily]

If he's not doing anything, why? That's a lot of effort for a mute point.

[ShySoul]

You thought he was only after sex. If he did something inappropriate that lead you to think that, then block away. You shouldn't have to put up with anything that makes you this uncomfortable.

If you see him, be as polite as the situation makes you be. If it's work, just do the job and skip the small talk. If it's social, don't say anything if you can avoid him. If you have to speak, say hi and go on with your life. No need to communicate with someone if you don't want to.

[rainbowsandroses]

On 9/26/2024 at 1:31 PM, Catlady15 said:

We went on a date last weekend and I know he’s not for me and don’t want to see him again.  I don’t know if I should just delete or block his number? I know I’ll have to see him at some point as he comes into my place of work. Also I’m not sure what to say when I do see him? 

@Catlady15 has this man asked you for a second date or otherwise expressed romantic interest in you after your date?

If not, then I'm curious why the need to block? 

Blocking (to me) is an emotional reaction used when we want to move on from someone who has hurt us or who is harassing us in some form or fashion. 

Has he done any of those things?  I think we may be missing important context since blocking is your "go to" in this situation.

To add, if he has not asked for a second date or expressed romantic interest, it's a bit presumptuous to tell him YOU are not interested or "feeling it" or that you don't wish to pursue anything further, it's possible HE isn't interested in pursuing anything further either! 

Anyway if you could provide more context and insight into why blocking is your "go to' here, it might be helpful.

[ShySoul]

1 hour ago, rainbowsandroses said:

Blocking (to me) is an emotional reaction used when we want to move on from someone who has hurt us or who is harassing us in some form or fashion. 

Has he done any of those things?  I think we may be missing important context since blocking is your "go to" in this situation.

Her previous thread indicated she feels he is "out for one thing." I suspect she feels uncomfortable by something he said or did so doesn't want want to take any chances. She also just got out of a situation where they were having sex but the guy didn't want a relationship and she wasn't okay with it. I imagine this has made her more sensitive to the issue and she is being extra cautious to protect herself.

Catlady, if your'e comfortable sharing what happened, it could help us get a better picture. But if you're not comfortable, that's okay too. If you don't want to be around him, it's your feelings and you're call. And if he did say or do something, blocking may be going easy on him in my book. Hope whatever happened, you are doing okay now.

[smackie9]

On 9/26/2024 at 1:31 PM, Catlady15 said:

We went on a date last weekend and I know he’s not for me and don’t want to see him again.  I don’t know if I should just delete or block his number? I know I’ll have to see him at some point as he comes into my place of work. Also I’m not sure what to say when I do see him? 

I get it, it's tough to reject someone, and there is always guilt or fear of a bad reaction. Just assure yourself everything will be ok because rejection is just part of dating. It's not the end of the world and he knows this.

Keep it simple...if he asks you out again tell him you didn't feel a connection and wish him all the best. Then just delete his number. If he tries to contact you again, tell him not to contact you, then block his number because there is no need to continue communication.

If you run into him, just be pleasant, or avoid him, depending on the situation.

[Wonderstruck]

On 9/26/2024 at 4:31 PM, Catlady15 said:

We went on a date last weekend and I know he’s not for me and don’t want to see him again.

This alone is more than enough reason to block him.

You obviously don't want to hear from him again, so there's no reason NOT to block him.

Otherwise, you're stuck dealing with the anxiety over him potentially contacting you.

Remember: You NEVER have to justify or defend blocking someone.

Always prioritize your mental and emotional well-being.

 

[Catlady15]

I’m confused right now, I’ve not been able to stop thinking about him all weekend! 🤷🏻‍♀️

[yogacat]

15 minutes ago, Catlady15 said:

I’m confused right now, I’ve not been able to stop thinking about him all weekend! 🤷🏻‍♀️

What changed your mind? Has he been in contact with you? Did you like him initially but felt like he just wanted to date you for one thing?

[ShySoul]

18 minutes ago, Catlady15 said:

I’m confused right now, I’ve not been able to stop thinking about him all weekend! 🤷🏻‍♀️

What's going on? Anything change? Did he contact you? Replaying events over again and having second thoughts?

We're here for you if you need to talk it out.

 

[Catlady15]

3 minutes ago, ShySoul said:

What's going on? Anything change? Did he contact you? Replaying events over again and having second thoughts?

We're here for you if you need to talk it out.

 

I’ve just found he’s been on my mind most of the weekend. He’s not contacted me. I have been replaying events and there is chemistry there but I’m just so confused. 

9 minutes ago, yogacat said:

What changed your mind? Has he been in contact with you? Did you like him initially but felt like he just wanted to date you for one thing?

9 minutes ago, yogacat said:

What changed your mind? Has he been in contact with you? Did you like him initially but felt like he just wanted to date you for one thing?

9 minutes ago, yogacat said:

What changed your mind? Has he been in contact with you? Did you like him initially but felt like he just wanted to date you for 

[yogacat]

33 minutes ago, Catlady15 said:

I’ve just found he’s been on my mind most of the weekend. He’s not contacted me. I have been replaying events and there is chemistry there but I’m just so confused. 

What made you feel he is only "after one thing?"

Not saying that may/may not be true but maybe if you could provide more context...

Maybe you wanted to block him initially because you felt disappointed after the first date. Has he not shown much interest aside of it being physical attraction?

You feel confused because, well...you want him to contact you.

[Batya33]

44 minutes ago, Catlady15 said:

I’ve just found he’s been on my mind most of the weekend. He’s not contacted me. I have been replaying events and there is chemistry there but I’m just so confused. 

Is it because he hasn't contacted you so now you're interested because of the challenge of it -now he's unavailable it seems? So that heightens your attraction and interest?

[ShySoul]

Sent you a PM. But had one other thought.

A friend once advised that if you're having doubts and second guessing things, it's a sign it isn't right. When things are right, you feel it and know. Things tend to flow. If you are hesitating, for whatever reason, might be a sign it's not meant to be.

Please feel free to share more context if you'd like. Hoping you sort it out.