please explain nc

[smushy]

from reading others postings, i've noticed a lot of reference to nc, and i was wondering if anyone could give me the ins and outs of it... such as when, how, what to expect, etc. i have also posted about my situation - my husband recently left me, if anyone has any insight into nc or about my other posting i would greatly appreciate it.

thanks- i need all the help i can get

[patience]

When you are truly ready to let someone go, no contact is usually necessary. Basically, you don't contact the person in any way, no phone calls, no letters, no emails, no showing up at places they go, no driving by their house, no talking to mutual friends, etc...you stay out of the other person's life 100%, and you keep that person out of your life 100%. This helps you to get some emotional distance from the situation, which is often quite necessary. You get the time you need to focus on you, take care of your needs, and put yourself first. It is really hard at first, but it gets easier as time goes by. They say the first month is the worst.

 

It is REALLY hard to let go of a relationship if you maintain contact.

[smushy]

thanks - i can't say that i'm ready to let this relationship go - in fact i know i'm not. today when he mentioned that we should meet with a lawyer soon and although we can talk to a counselor, his mind is made up, i felt completely shattered. we have been talking everyday and haven't been fighting or anything, so even though i wasn't deluding myself into thinking that it meant he wanted to come back, i was telling myself that maybe in time, with help, we can work through things and salvage our marriage. i certainly want to.

does this sound like a situation where nc would be something that would be good for me?

[heloladies21]

This is No Contact:

 

link removed

 

It helps you get stronger and more able to deal with the ex if they want to come back, and more able to move on if they decide not to.