Is this a commitment text?

[Sindy_0311]

Well he just sent me a video of his event… a bunch of ladies around…

Man, I’m tired of all this BS… can someone send me a man… a good man… a not one of these online daters crap… 

[Sindy_0311]

This just makes me want to block him directly… 

[rainbowsandroses]

5 minutes ago, Sindy_0311 said:

Well he just sent me a video of his event… a bunch of ladies around…

Man, I’m tired of all this BS… can someone send me a man… a good man… a not one of these online daters crap… 

OK, so what do you plan to do about it?  You could text him right now that it's over and block him.  And be done! 

May I ask what you're waiting for?

[Sindy_0311]

I m waiting for someone to give me the right words to text… please 😂 

[rainbowsandroses]

8 minutes ago, Sindy_0311 said:

I m waiting for someone to give me the right words to text… please 😂 

I suggested previously:

"After talking last night, I realize you and I are on different pages re what we both want and envision for the future.  I've enjoyed our time together and wish you the best."

DONE.  Block, delete.

Just a suggestion. You can use your own words, but same message. 

Short, clean, no drama.  Your time together wasn't long enough to warrant any drama, lol. 

 

 

[Sindy_0311]

Something like this? 
 

According to the discussion we had last night, I think we are not on the same page and I don’t see any potential in this relationship. I want to find someone who is ready to go all the way through with me, hence the reason why I prefer leaving it to that point. I prefer cut contact, I hope you understand and I wish you well. 

[Jaunty]

6 hours ago, Batya33 said:

I would not see him again or risk your son getting attached.  He wants to keep his options open if some pretty lady catches his eye, etc.  And continue to date you (and have sex with you because after all that pretty lady might not pan out so why give you up?).

But -  correct me if I'm wrong, but @Sindy_0311 is actively dating other men, currently, in real time.  It's not just that some guy might catch her eye - she's dated another man in the past week.  

Also OP is still engaging with a man who treated her pretty poorly (Italian love bomber guy).  

So why is this attitude of Festival Fellow a negative?  He's being honest.  There is not any reason to stop seeing him because of this.

There IS probably a reason to not attach "Mister Right" hopes onto him.  That said, I don't think that you, @Sindy_0311,  are a good candidate to be someone's "Ms. Right" now either.   

I like you a lot, you are very interesting and seem like you have a great deal of self awareness and go about much of your life in a very intentional way - but right now, as someone else posted recently, you seem to be more interested in being desired by a man / men than actually being present for commitment.   The ability to be vulnerable is still lacking.   If you really want Mister Right you'll have to take the scary plunge and just do that, which will almost certainly involve pain, I'm sorry to say.  You will get hurt, which you are so very vigilant about avoiding.  

So for now, you and this guy seem like a good fit.  At least you can stop playing games with him since he's put his cards on the table, and you are enjoying each other very much.

 

[NighttimeNightmare]

7 hours ago, Sindy_0311 said:

He said that for the moment he wasn’t willing to engage with anyone else but then said, but who knows if someday I get to have a crush on someone else I cannot promise fidelity.

That’d be the end of it for me. No more talking to the person, talking about the person trying to decode ***.  Just done.  Goodbye!

[rainbowsandroses]

17 minutes ago, NighttimeNightmare said:

That’d be the end of it for me. No more talking to the person, talking about the person trying to decode ***.  Just done.  Goodbye!

Yup.  And this:

1 hour ago, Sindy_0311 said:

Well he just sent me a video of his event… a bunch of ladies around…

It's almost insulting. Intentionally.

And yes part of it may be pride or ego, but what the heck, ya know?  What is he doing? 

Higher standards Sindy, please.  To say you deserve better is an understatement.

[Wiseman2]

59 minutes ago, Sindy_0311 said:

Something like this? 
 

According to the discussion we had last night, I think we are not on the same page and I don’t see any potential in this relationship. I want to find someone who is ready to go all the way through with me, hence the reason why I prefer leaving it to that point. I prefer cut contact, I hope you understand and I wish you well. 

Unfortunately this seems more like a plea for commitment. Try to keep it simple about not being on the same page. (Even though you Are on the same noncommittal page).

It seems you had some nice times together so ending things civilly before anyone gets hurt is probably a good idea.

[Sindy_0311]

Sorry @Jaunty i like you a lot too, but I’m going to follow others advice. This ‘what if someday I get a crush on someone else’ comment was really inappropriate, especially in early stage. among many other things. It’s just my intuition speaking, and I am following it. 

I just sent him THE text and blocked him. I will miss him during a few days, and just move on… yeah… 

 

[Sindy_0311]

That was my text:

Anyway, regarding the discussions we had yesterday, other things and some time to think about all that, I'm going to leave you to lead your life. I think i’m not the one for you, and vice versa. I'm sending you this message before blocking you. Not out of malice, but I prefer no contact in these cases. I really enjoyed our time and wish you the best! Take care of yourself. 

this is a French/English translation!… 
thank you all for posting here, it was very helpful… I guess this thread is closed now 😊

[Batya33]

2 hours ago, Sindy_0311 said:

Well he just sent me a video of his event… a bunch of ladies around…

Man, I’m tired of all this BS… can someone send me a man… a good man… a not one of these online daters crap… 

To me it’s nothing to do how you met. My husband and I both had online profiles. My friend who texted me two days ago met his wife online. Married over 20 years happily.  It is tacky for him to send you a photo like that. Just silly. It’s like you’re his bro. 

[Batya33]

2 hours ago, Jaunty said:

But -  correct me if I'm wrong, but @Sindy_0311 is actively dating other men, currently, in real time.  It's not just that some guy might catch her eye - she's dated another man in the past week.  

Also OP is still engaging with a man who treated her pretty poorly (Italian love bomber guy).  

So why is this attitude of Festival Fellow a negative?  He's being honest.  There is not any reason to stop seeing him because of this.

There IS probably a reason to not attach "Mister Right" hopes onto him.  That said, I don't think that you, @Sindy_0311,  are a good candidate to be someone's "Ms. Right" now either.   

I like you a lot, you are very interesting and seem like you have a great deal of self awareness and go about much of your life in a very intentional way - but right now, as someone else posted recently, you seem to be more interested in being desired by a man / men than actually being present for commitment.   The ability to be vulnerable is still lacking.   If you really want Mister Right you'll have to take the scary plunge and just do that, which will almost certainly involve pain, I'm sorry to say.  You will get hurt, which you are so very vigilant about avoiding.  

So for now, you and this guy seem like a good fit.  At least you can stop playing games with him since he's put his cards on the table, and you are enjoying each other very much.

 

I wrote that I don’t think she’s serious minded either and she likely stayed over and was intimate because she was partly relieved that he’s not interested in a serious relationship with her. I still think his comment was tacky. 

[Capricorn3]

7 hours ago, Sindy_0311 said:

thank you all for posting here, it was very helpful… I guess this thread is closed now 😊

Done. Closed.