I get so lost when NC is broken

[freedom]

I do hate it when NC is broken, I get all torn apart.

I was doing sooo well until she called, stating that she misses our conversations.

I am currently overseas and it has been a constructive 2 weeks and i felt that i was moving on, then BOOM! it her, and i thought that i could handle it. We talked for an hour and i pretty pleased with myself cos i didnt get to emotioally attahed again. BUT the next 2 days, tick tick tick brain starts thinking about the posiblity that i can happen, we can ge back together. The logicallic say NO but the emotional says YES. Left/ Right brain activity is killing me. I have been trying to keep busy but to no avail.

I'm getting FRUSTRTED again by the fact that someone can simply trigger me off like this. ArrrRRRGGHHHHHHH!!!!!

There is a fine point of sanity and insanity.... and i have started to cross that fine line.

Just venting.. sorry guys

The fact that i have my head on straight one moment and off to the side the next has gotten me to this stage. anyone want to scream like me ???

AAAAARRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!

[moe42]

hey ive gone through the same thing with my bf and i tell you it still gets me sometimes. we break up for whatever reason and he says he misses me and us hanging out and just talking and i start thinking well if he is making this much of an effort to get to me he must really care and then we get back together and then i wonder. all the same things all the time i wonder and even though i know its the right thing to do i cant bring myself to take my own advice. stay apart for a month or two even if it feels like its going to kill you stay apart. dont call dont talk just wait and if after a month or two of absolutly no contact you still want to be with her go for it! like that saying if you love something let it go if it returns thats when you know

[freedom]

this is so consuming that i cant even think.

I am in the media line and i have truly lost myself in this to the point that i can't be creative. I cant even think of a angle of a shot and that is really bad.

I dont intend to meet with her for a long time, as i have figured out that i am only there just in case no one beter comes along. She refuses to state where i stand with her in this relationship. it is like being in abyss!

CCCCCRAAAPPPPP!!!!

I have never let anyone control/ oush my buttons like this... ARRRGGH!

VENT VENT VENT VENT VENT!!!