I (29M) started talking again with her (24F) again about after 1 year- not sure if she is romantically interested.

[toughlove1993]

1 minute ago, Jaunty said:

Why?  I thought you didn't want to be friends.  You didn't need to send her a message, but you did - now it's time to block and move on.   Permanently.

Why does it matter?  I thought you did NOT want to be friends with HER?  

I finished it now. See comment above yours. 😢

[boltnrun]

You're contradicting yourself. Saying you can't continue to communicate yet offering to be there for her makes no sense. Your offer to "be there for her" was yet another attempt to get her to continue messaging you. Why else would you do that? And you can't be upset with her for messaging you when you keep inviting her to and when you keep responding.

What are you supposed to do? Stop! Stop responding, stop giving her the attention she wants and stop being your own worst enemy.

As for why she does this? Because you allow it. You can also put a stop to it today. If you really wanted to.

[toughlove1993]

11 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

You're contradicting yourself. Saying you can't continue to communicate yet offering to be there for her makes no sense. Your offer to "be there for her" was yet another attempt to get her to continue messaging you. Why else would you do that? And you can't be upset with her for messaging you when you keep inviting her to and when you keep responding.

What are you supposed to do? Stop! Stop responding, stop giving her the attention she wants and stop being your own worst enemy.

As for why she does this? Because you allow it. You can also put a stop to it today. If you really wanted to.

You think that message was easy for me to write? It was the best I could do with my current state, I told her I don't want her as a friend and that she should get in touch if things don't work out. The reason why I said "I'll still be here if you need me" was me trying to be nice because she wanted me to help out with some work related things and I had agreed. It's a polite offer, I don't expect her to get back in touch now. If she send any more random messages I'll probably just ignore her.

[boltnrun]

Problem is, every time your phone pings and it's her you'll go through the anguish all over again. 

If you want "easy", go ahead and block her number. It's highly unlikely she'll be "hurt". If she's even a remotely decent person she'll understand.

[toughlove1993]

Just now, boltnrun said:

Problem is, every time your phone pings and it's her you'll go through the anguish all over again. 

If you want "easy", go ahead and block her number. It's highly unlikely she'll be "hurt". If she's even a remotely decent person she'll understand.

I genuinely don't believe she'll message again. I mean I literally said I can't be her friend. When she said she loves him it tore into me 😢 and made it sink in I have no chance. I am sorry it was not a perfect message, but best I could do 😢

[boltnrun]

No need to be sorry. There is no perfect message. 

I'm just basing my presumptions on her past behavior which was to continue messaging you even when you told her you didn't want to be friends. I presume she'll continue steamroll over your objections. Which is why I recommend blocking her. 

[Batya33]

1 hour ago, toughlove1993 said:

I've sent her a message just waiting for her to reply now.

If she does not want to be friends then why is she messaging me? What is she after in your opinion?

Nothing at all.  It’s fun to text people when you’re bored especially people who think you’re awesome. I mean fun for her. Takes no effort and payoff is it’s good for her ego.  

[toughlove1993]

3 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

No need to be sorry. There is no perfect message. 

I'm just basing my presumptions on her past behavior which was to continue messaging you even when you told her you didn't want to be friends. I presume she'll continue steamroll over your objections. Which is why I recommend blocking her. 

I wont allow this to continue, if she tries it I'll shut it down. I've done the hardest part for me which is tell her how I feel. If she truly loves him and wants to be with him and respects my wishes then she'll stay away now.

This hurts a lot  😢

[boltnrun]

If you find yourself checking your phone for messages from her or to see if she reads your messages...I think it's time to block her number and delete it.

I'm sorry you're in pain. 

[toughlove1993]

I think its best I head off to bed. Don't feel so good 😢

[Batya33]

54 minutes ago, toughlove1993 said:

I think its best I head off to bed. Don't feel so good 😢

I hope you feel better tomorrow.