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Family Vacations and Plans

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Just now, boltnrun said:

As is their choice as free adults.

Do you really believe he's obligated to go on this "family vacation" because you want him to?

Or obligated to be "fair" about going on this one because he goes on her family's? Who wrote that rule book?

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6 hours ago, tattoobunnie said:

Bring a friend.  

Of course!   There's your solution.  Seriously, would you really want your brother and his gf to go on this vacation with you, which they are not enthusiastic about?  It would be a downer.  You're excited, your parents are too.  Yes, bring a friend.  And then you will have someone to take the extra room in the place you like.

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Your brother and his girlfriend spend more time with her parents because money talks.  If her parents were not wealthy,  they would decline being with her parents and family during vacation. 

Respect that your brother and his girlfriend are non-committal regarding your planned vacation 6 months from now.  They're actually doing you a favor than commit to a vacation and canceling later which is worse.  Assume their non-attendance by taking responsibility for your pets. 

Your parents are getting older.  Have a good time with your parents if you want to be with them during vacation.  Or, change their plans if they're deferring to you to organize the vacation.  Select smaller accommodations.  Perhaps just the two of them can vacation while you stay home and relax.  Privacy and having your own time to relax is wonderful. 

I remember when my husband, sons, their grandparents, great aunt and great uncle went on vacation together while I remained at home for four glorious days!  They had a great time and I savored my relaxing alone time.  The break was great! 

I liked @tattoobunnie's idea about bringing a friend.  Or, do you have an extended relative who might be interested in accompanying you and your parents?  A cousin perhaps? 

Switch gears and be open to Plan B.  And, you're not a loser!  Change your perspective and this situation will not be all doom and gloom.

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On 1/5/2023 at 4:16 AM, Kwothe28 said:

... you will plan vacation without him, that he will instead be a sitter for the animals and that is about it. You cant force him...

And, you can't exactly force him to sit for the animals, either.

OP, your brother is doing his own version of what we've all suggested could benefit you--stop enmeshing with your mother.

It's great that you have a girls' weekend coming up.  It's also great if you'd like to take a trip with your folks. It's just not your brother's obligation--or yours.

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