sweetlady Posted December 30, 2022 Share Posted December 30, 2022 I normally don't really like to post here too much about my relationship but just need to off load a bit and see what you all think. My partner and I are expecting a baby in February. We are close in my eyes probably because of the baby. So he been going to his church quite a few times. My partner currently doesn't work hopefully soon he will. Not stopping him from going to his church or out anywhere. My issue is I can't keep funding his travel because money is needed for other stuff. I use to help a lot but now I had to be mean and say no and put me and my son first. For example got money and made it clear I be getting my son his presents he didn't want much either considering he asked for two expensive things and I said no and basically he listed other stuff which was not expensive plus my son understood he wouldn't get much as his birthday soon after Christmas too. So my partner he can't go he won't ask anyone to go his church. It something that happens each year I knew he didn't want to miss it. Someone from his church gave him the money to go and I just helped him book through his account. What annoyed me was I said I did feel bad I couldn't give you money but I had to get my son gifts. His answer to that was quite selfish saying I was putting these presents before God. As my partner doesn't really do Christmas either. I was annoyed by this comment. But stuck to my guns my son comes first glad he got help to go to this church event but not going to keep setting myself back all the time. He doesn't need to go all the time. He went first week in December and then week before ending. I said you should of just gone to the last one. He went had a great time etc. So the week coming he had a party to go to with his friends so again he knew I didn't have the money to give him. Well I had a little but needed it for things. I was getting paid the next day. His mate said he give him the travel money down but he needs to find money back. I said let me see how much I have next day need to get more Christmas stuff etc. My mum had come to stay with us so she gave him the money. I ended up giving him some too. So again off he went and I didn't contact him once. Let him message me etc. He did saying if I tried contacting him and can't get him don't worry he forgot his charger etc. Tbh I totally ignored the message didn't even respond was annoyed he knows how far pregnant I am etc. Somehow he must of found a charger got his phone charged up. This was in morning after he been out. I had a friend coming so didn't think about him etc enjoyed my day. My mum said to me it's a good job I am here he can't be going out like this leaving you all the time as you near to having the baby. I got her point too and she even said to him after going to this party hold of on going out you can't keep leaving her she so close to having the baby. So that passed Christmas day came and it was okay. But because everywhere shut he said he felt like he was in prison now this has really annoyed me. Because he been going out quite a lot not stuck at home. Day after he couldn't wait to go for his walk do his normal thing. I don't mind him going out but he carries on like he living in prison when he at home. It's not my fault he hasn't got money etc. I try my best to help him but if I need things then say no because food, gas, electric and my son important. I get he needs to go out for some alone time and space. But it's getting to the point I do feel he doesn't want to be around me. The past two days I have really felt annoyed. We had to go to our local town centre quickly to do do a few things come home go to scan. We come home he quickly pops out I got annoyed. I won't lie I actually went to the shop just see if he actually was going where he said. Ofcourse he was at his shop. Then he didn't say anything to me he knew what I did. Then went had to go to the scan. Yesterday the same he went out and like I don't mind but I got fed up just went out to so some shopping myself. I feel just fed up with him carrying like he doesn't go no where or do anything. Obviously I am happy about having a baby but even before baby born would like time with him or even go a night away. When I have the baby I feel I be left at home and hopefully he be working. He be off going away and I be left at home. The thing is I am not one to sit at home all day. So after recovering from birth and a few months I will be out and about going to baby groups etc. He just seems selfish at the moment and it's not like I have him locked up in prison. It's the situation he in he has to deal with not my fault and while I do help him my baby and son comes first now. Maybe it's because I am coming to the end of my pregnancy but even thought about telling him it's over. Just feels like we not together but he just living with me. He is supportive in other ways rather than financial which I know he desperate to work just he can't at the moment. He knows I won't keep handing him money to go out or go his church the time. If he does get money he does help as he does so odd jobs here and there for people in his church. The problem now seems he just doesn't want to be around me. He doesn't suggest us go down the road together or say let do this or that. Just seems bored and I do give him his space. Just wondering what you all think. Quote Link to comment
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