can our relationship survive three weeks of NC?

[lauriecat]

first of all, sorry for posting so much lately.

 

anyway i just found out tonight that my bf will be going away for three weeks during the summer (possibly on my birthday even ) he will be in europe (i live in the u.s.), so the chances i will have to talk to him will be virtually zero. we have only been together for a short amount of time (2 months) but we both feel for eachother very strongly. my question is... how can our relationship survive without three weeks of contact? since i met him i haven't gone longer than half a day without talking to him! we miss eachother after 2 days of being apart, i dont even want to think about 3 weeks. he is getting nervous about leaving bc he feels that i will get bored without both him and my best friend being here (shes a camp councelor in penn)... and he is afraid that i will seek out another guy to keep me company. i assured him that this is not true, but since the relationship is fairly new to us, i wonder if we can really survive three whole weeks without losing some of our feelings? please help, i feel as if he's already leaving for the airport and i want to cry!

[DN]

Admittedly it was wartime but even so ... my parents were married six weeks after they met and a further six weeks after that he was sent to India with the Army - and was gone for three and a half years. Their marriage lasted until my mother died.

 

He may not be able to phone or text but he can write letters or send postcards. If your new relationship can't stand the stress if 3 weeks apart the chances are it wouldn't have lasted anyway.

[smiles21]

"Absense makes the heart grow fonder.." Think you should be fine, if you truly care about one another this shouldn't be a big deal.

[a_little_sparrow]

Hey lauriecat,

 

I"m in the same boat with you, except my gf is away for 6 weeks! I can't even begin to tell you how much I miss her at this moment and every moment. And how sad it is without her around. For most of the 6 weeks she's gone to Europe for this language immersion school. The other two weeks she's going to these family weddings...events I wish I could have been invited to, but we just haven't been dating long enough for me to have been included on any RSVPs.

 

I'll tell you, though, one thing I've done since she left is look at the time for me to work on myself. I've decided I'm going to retake the GREs in the fall, and so I'm diving earnestly into studying for those now, since I have so much extra time to give to it.

 

But other than that, I just wait to see how she'll be able to contact me. And I can assure you it's agony. We have only been dating since the beginning of April, but as soon as we started dating it got very serious very fast. And what I have to do is trust that what we have had is going to be enough to get through these next 5 weeks. (today I just got past the first week)

 

But I can tell you, knownig that she must be into me in some capacity (after all she's contacted me since she's been gone through phone and email), and knowing that I don't have to work so hard to make sure she knows I'm still there feels really good. And lets me see that if we can make it through this type of separation, there will probably be a lot of very happy days in the future when she returns.

 

I hope this helps some.

Sparrow.

[unhappyinlove1]

You'll be fine - you'll miss each other a ton and it will be an amazing reunion.

 

A few tips from a frequent traveler (I go out of the country for work for a couple of months every year). Maintaining a relationship just takes a little more work and a little money. You can call your long distance provider and get an international plan for whatever country he's traveling to and cancel it when he returns (it's something like $5 a month and 10 cents a minute). Tell him to buy a calling card in that country (or wherever he's going) and then have him call you and you hang up and just call him back to the hotel. You'd be amazed what a 15 minute conversation once a week can do for you to maintain the intimacy!

[RayKay]

If your relationship can't survive three weeks apart in "NC" then honestly, it was not meant to be as it would never survive some of the much harder things that will be thrown at you in life. I have been in some LDR's where there was no contact for far longer and all survived, and gone through some pretty terrible other issues with partners far worse then distance (ie serious illness, etc) and they too survived. Honestly if three weeks breaks you apart, your relationship was not strong enough in the first place.

 

Try not to get too worried about it, enjoy the time you have before he leaves, when he is away keep yourself busy - if you want you can write him letters to give him when he comes back! I am sure he can also send you letters/postcards. See if maybe you can arrange a call once or twice while he is away, it might be possible if it is kept short and you two agree to split the bill

 

And three weeks will be over fast, really.