Jump to content

i feel like im losing him n more ways than 1

Recommended Posts

ok so ya im probably going to sound stupid, but here goes.....


like ive said before my bf is pretty sick link removed and as of lately with everything going on with him and having to go to the Dr's and hospitals, i feel like im losing...... i find myself pushing him away a bit because im so scared of losing him and if i get any more attached to him than I am (i cant see how i could get more attached but im sure i could) its going to hurt worse if something were to happen to him. he is my world, but then again i hate myself for doing that becuase i know he needs me. im the only stable thing in his life..... yet im falling apart with school and finals and the stress of being the strong one in this relationship.


i also feel like im losing him becuase he is possibly going to be starting a new job that will take up all our weekend time (which is the only time i have) and im starting to work 3 jobs! and hes starting college in the fall and im starting my senior year.....


i want to talk to him about these things but its so hard becuase i know it makes us both very upset when we talk about the whole medical stuff, and im affraid he'll start to worry if i talk about our jobs and how we wont see each other......


and now that ive written this rather long message and done a bit of i would greatly appreciate ANYTHING anyone has to say......... please

Link to comment

he cant breathe. he has to breathe into a paper bag so he does not hyperventilate. if he doesnt have a bag or if he cant control his breathing he loses all control of his arms and legs and he starts convulsing. last time he had one he turned purple from lock of oxygen. he goes numb for a while too if it gets really bad.......


and the drs still cant figure out whats wrong......

Link to comment

wow, having to deal with that at 16? I commend you, that's rough. But sounds like there's a lot of love there. You're young so don't feel bad that you're feeling like it's too much. All I can suggest is stand by him, he needs you and you love eachother. Plus don't think so negatively... and even if he were to pass on after you two were married and had kids, just think (from what i can tell) you have experienced, had, and felt a love at 16 that some people wont feel in a life time.

Link to comment

I think it might be a good thing to bring up the job situation and not seeing each other as much. Except I would try to frame the conversation in a positive manner. Instead of both of you getting upset over seeing each other less take your schedules out and figure out the times when you will see each other. Make sure you both have that as a major priority and make sure that each of you know it's a major priority to the other. That way even if you are seeing each other less you still know that the other person wishes they could see you and that they are making every effort to do so.


As far as the pulling away, well, not sure this is the greatest advice but take it for what it's worth. We could all lose anyone in our lives at any moment. Yes, knowing it's more likely or having a possible time limit makes it much much harder, but it is always a possibility.


When I was 16 one of my friends was killed in a car accident. It was one of the hardest things I have ever gone through in my life, the first time a friend and peer died. I did learn one important thing though, never ever take anyone for granted. If you love a person (platonically or romantically) then make sure to enjoy every moment with them that you can. It's impossible to go through life only depending on yourself (I know, I've tried and it's still messing with me) and there is a risk of losing anyone you are close too. Not sure that will really help, but it's how I would try to look at it (not saying I would necessarily succeed).

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...