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Should I stay or should I go?


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Hey everyone,

I previously posted regarding an issue between management and a colleague at my current position. This post has evolved from that situation, so if you want more context it may be worth a quick read. 

Essentially, I am unsatisfied at my current job. There are several issues:

  • Management ー this extends to gossip, unwillingness to listen, lack of direction and planning, lack of collaboration, lack of support, off comments, etc.
  • Lack of opportunity for growth ー the business is growing rapidly, but my role seems to be being minimised. When I joined I expressed my interest in growth, but I feel this isnt going to happen. 
  • Disagreement with strategy ー I am not in a formal leadership position, but it is a small company and I disagree with some decisions and executions, especially regarding managing growth and assignment of responsibility.

These are the main issues, and I don't think its necessary to go into detail. The main question I have relates to a potential opportunity to change jobs. I have lined up an interview for this Monday with another job. I am quietly confident I can secure the position. 

Should I discuss this with my boss, who is not my direct manager and with whom I do have a good relationship. Given the kinds of issues I have, I don't think there is an actionable solution without wide intervention, so maybe its better to just see if I get this job, then let her know why in a tactful way through exit interview? I just feel guilty because she is probably not aware how deep the issue has been and despite my issues with management and strategy, the business itself I really like. 

I dunno, I am a bit torn and exhausted from even being in this position so looking for some outside council. 

Thanks,

T

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I would wait till you have a solid offer and if you think your supervisor would be open to addressing and resolving your concerns then go to her. It’s tricky but it’s business and you don’t owe them a heads up - just give the appropriate amount of notice for a smooth transition.  Also have you vetted the work environment at this new position /company? Good luck!

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Thanks Batya,

I have vetted as far as possible. Their own recruitment, website, initial phone conversation all indicated that they possibly offer solutions to my concerns, although I take any self reporting with a grain of salt. They are more established, which has the trade off that I would like have less freedom prima facie, although in my current role, the opportunity to be a part of shaping growth and developing was largely illusory anyway. Unfortunately, I havent been able to find independant reviews from employees or ex employees, however the Monday interview is a full day observation as well so hopefully that can answer some questions. I also need to properly discuss benefits.

But ultimately, you're right. I feel guilty because my boss gave me an opportunity, and I have good benefits on paper here (I may take a minor hit to change roles), but ultimately, I don't see her being able to address the issues and I kind of know what I have to do. 

Thanks,

T

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Good luck on the interview. First see if it's a good fit, you want the position and the position is offered. Then resign in the acceptable manor for your country/workplace. As you know exit interviews do nothing for you. They are for their feedback. You won't even be there any longer.

Keep in mind any grievances you air during an exit interview may feel good in the moment for getting it off your chest, but perhaps it's best to leave a place on good terms and look  more down the road at your own professional success rather than in the rearview mirror at what you feel frustrated you there.

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So I'm not sure if this applies to your current situation but have you asked for specific things that you feel would promote your career/professional growth.  For example in the mid 90s I was a junior person at a huge company.  There was a project I wanted to handle that another junior person had been handling -my level - but he was given more important/high level work than me overall.  It was a bit of a challenge for me professionally.

I found out junior person was going on his honeymoon soon. So I went first to him and asked him who was going to be handling the project in his absence.  He said he wasn't sure but said he was tired of handling it and would be thrilled if I wanted to take it over.  So I went to Big Boss.  I was nervous.

  I told him what I wanted to do and why. And he said yes.  I am almost positive they'd never have thought of me specifically to do it. Doing it added to my experience immeasurably and later when I sort of moved up again having had that experience was a huge plus.  

12 hours ago, WaywardKiwi said:

When I joined I expressed my interest in growth, but I feel this isnt going to happen. 

So this is why I wrote this anecdote -how did you express it and how have you continued to express it and show why they should invest time in you for growth?

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On 7/8/2022 at 6:56 PM, WaywardKiwi said:

Given the kinds of issues I have, I don't think there is an actionable solution without wide intervention, so maybe its better to just see if I get this job, then let her know why in a tactful way through exit interview? I just feel guilty...

This sounds like the path I'd take, sans the guilt.

Work is business. People change jobs all the time--this isn't some breakup with a lover.

If the manager you're concerned about is a friend, she will be realistically happy for you despite whatever inconvenience to the company, and the two of you can remain networked and possibly find yourselves working together again someday.

Otherwise, if she personalizes this, then she's projecting stuff that doesn't belong to you, which demo's lousy judgment--in which case, discussing the situation ahead of an offer is of no benefit to either of you, anyway.

Head high, and head out with a feeling of liberation rather than clouding that with misplaced loyalties. You can take true friends with you beyond this scene--and you can credit them with navigating their own careers as they see fit.

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  • 3 weeks later...
On 7/8/2022 at 5:56 PM, WaywardKiwi said:

Hey everyone,

I previously posted regarding an issue between management and a colleague at my current position. This post has evolved from that situation, so if you want more context it may be worth a quick read. 

Essentially, I am unsatisfied at my current job. There are several issues:

  • Management ー this extends to gossip, unwillingness to listen, lack of direction and planning, lack of collaboration, lack of support, off comments, etc.
  • Lack of opportunity for growth ー the business is growing rapidly, but my role seems to be being minimised. When I joined I expressed my interest in growth, but I feel this isnt going to happen. 
  • Disagreement with strategy ー I am not in a formal leadership position, but it is a small company and I disagree with some decisions and executions, especially regarding managing growth and assignment of responsibility.

These are the main issues, and I don't think its necessary to go into detail. The main question I have relates to a potential opportunity to change jobs. I have lined up an interview for this Monday with another job. I am quietly confident I can secure the position. 

Should I discuss this with my boss, who is not my direct manager and with whom I do have a good relationship. Given the kinds of issues I have, I don't think there is an actionable solution without wide intervention, so maybe its better to just see if I get this job, then let her know why in a tactful way through exit interview? I just feel guilty because she is probably not aware how deep the issue has been and despite my issues with management and strategy, the business itself I really like. 

I dunno, I am a bit torn and exhausted from even being in this position so looking for some outside council. 

Thanks,

T

Yes. You should wait until you have a solid offer. Then, you never know. They might entice you to stay. An ace up your sleeve is only wrong when playing cards.

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