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Is it normal for ldr to take over a day to reply


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Me and my boyfriend are ldr for the summer which is going to be 2 months, however he hardly replies to my texts and I get that we don’t have to talk 24/7 as he stated he works so much he doesn’t have much interesting stuff to say but sometimes it’s over 24 hours, I don’t know surely you want to talk to your girlfriend more than that? Especially if it’s ldr there’s no way I can see him!!

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Unless there's a phone or reception problem, I'd say that's a little much. Can you video chat before bed or something? Everyone lays in bed at night before sleeping...catch a few minutes then?

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When my husband and I were LDR we spoke every night by phone for 20-30 minutes on days we didn't see each other (we were able to see each other every 11-14 days) and we emailed a bit during the day.  I didn't have a cell phone.  No messaging or texting back and forth. We had a great time on the phone usually  -just chit chatted about our day, funny stories, etc.  I don't remember who would call who -I think it depended on where we were etc.  

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There is no right or wrong, only what's right for you and him. Some people don't need to talk all the time or even every single day. 

What you are learning here is that you and him have different needs when it comes to keeping in touch and communication frequency. You aren't wrong to need more and he isn't wrong to need less. The million dollar question is can you deal with it, compromise, come up with something that suits you both?

Also, pay attention to what he is telling you - he finds it difficult to maintain an interesting conversation with you. Conversations are a two way street, so what are you bringing into that convo? Are you just bragging about what you did and he feels left out and can't contribute because he just worked all day? Are you not contributing enough, so he feels like he has to carry the conversation by himself? I'd pay a little more attention to what he is saying rather than jumping to paint him as a bad guy or someone who just doesn't care enough. Sometimes quality is more important than quantity. Food for thought.

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8 hours ago, Rubyroe said:

 for the summer which is going to be 2 months, 

How long have you been dating? How old is he? Is he away for work or is this a summer break from college? Don't text-tether anyone. Are you afraid he's cheating or just losing interest?

 

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8 hours ago, Rubyroe said:

Me and my boyfriend are ldr for the summer which is going to be 2 months, however he hardly replies to my texts and I get that we don’t have to talk 24/7 as he stated he works so much he doesn’t have much interesting stuff to say but sometimes it’s over 24 hours, I don’t know surely you want to talk to your girlfriend more than that? Especially if it’s ldr there’s no way I can see him!!

A few short days ago you were telling us that he likes to share his threesome thoughts, something you don’t appreciate. Could this disagreement be affecting your communication in general? 

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11 minutes ago, Rose Mosse said:

A few short days ago you were telling us that he likes to share his threesome thoughts.

Interesting. If this is the same guy, run. Do not under any circumstances sext or sexual video chat. He'll just be boasting and showing it to all his friends and his next target or whoever he's sleeping with locally now.

Use these two months to date others and get away from this creep. This is your first relationship. Learn right now not to chase jerks.

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I wouldnt buy "busy" excuse, he always has time during the day when he is free to shoot the text, at least now that is easy. He just doesnt want to. My guess is that he is just "checking out". It is a common thing in LDR. We have a saying here "Far from home, far from heart". So that is maybe a case here.

Anyway, with you being unhappy with his quality of communication and sexual talk, maybe you should rethink if you are really compatible. Maybe stuff goes back to normal after you can see each other again, but in my experience, those stuff rarely turn on the better. If he is checking out, that is about it.

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My take on it is, when they don't respond it's because they don't want to. I don't buy "I'm too busy" excuse. Even tho my husband works long hours and we are talking 16+ hours, he just can't wait to chew my ear off about his day when he gets home. When he's at work, any juicy gossip comes his way, he's calling me on the phone. So it's either your BF doesn't have the interest in you like he did before, or you two are not compatible. 

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It doesn't sound like the relationship is going over well anyway. Sometimes he says too much. Sometimes not enough. 

What is wrong with this guy. 

Let him come to you and if he doesn't that is A-OK.

 

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Spend some time envisioning the kind of relationship you want.

Relax into that vision and really enjoy it.

Once you get clear about it, snap out of that vision and ask yourself whether this BF is giving you enough of what you want from a relationship.

Then question why you'd trade a whole summer of dating opportunities for whatever this BF offers you.

We never get any wasted time back to re-live over again.

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Your Partner Needs to Step Up (Don&...
Your Partner Needs to Step Up (Don't Accept His SH*T!)

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