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I don't know what to do


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I got a crush on one of my Best friends from school. we've known each other since year 8 which is 12-13 years old but there is one little problem & that is he's taken - I have told him that I have a crush on him but I found that hard as he does have a gf & i was scared to tell him in case she saw the message. He loves me but just as a best friend & nothing more. He doesn't want our friendship to end & I understand that.

Also every time we chat to each other it always turns into flirting - but when he flirts with me I get worried in case his gf sees yes I know they don't live together but still he does see her & i'm nervous that she'll one day take his phone & read the messages me & him have been sending.

I don't know if this is a natural thing flirting with my best friend who has a gf.

I'm taken as well but my bf goes quiet on me time after time and comes out of the blue which I wished he would stop doing as it is annoying!

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38 minutes ago, Jadesamson12 said:

 my bf  Kenny for short goes quiet on me time after time and comes out of the blue which I wished he would stop doing as it is annoying!

 How long have you been dating?Focus on your current BF.

What do you mean by "kenny goes quiet on you"?

Is it on/off or unhappy? As far as your friend, stop flirting. Friends don't flirt. 

You seem unhappy with your BF and perhaps you're chasing this friend for attention?

 

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11 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

 How long have you been dating?Focus on your current BF.

What do you mean by "kenny goes quiet on you"?

Is it on/off or unhappy? As far as your friend, stop flirting. Friends don't flirt. 

You seem unhappy with your BF and perhaps you're chasing this friend for attention?

 

Me and kendyll have been together for 1 year in october 1st.

When kenny goes quiet on me he's been doing this or a little while now. as of 2014 he used to talk to me all the time now all of a sudden he's been going quiet on me like one time i asked him how is he then nothing until a very long time.

And it's not an on/off relationship or unhappy at the moment.

And no i'm not Chasing Nick for attention it's not my fault I have a crush on him.

 

 

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1 hour ago, Jadesamson12 said:

And no i'm not Chasing Nick for attention it's not my fault I have a crush on him.

Your reaction to your crush is your fault.  Make the right choice and don't flirt with other women's partners.  Also if you ever dated Nick wouldn't your stomach and/or head hurt every time you wondered who he was flirting with or sexting with? Why do you think he'd act loyal to you? Also he knows you're fine being involved in flirting with someone else's partner - so perhaps he might wonder if you have enough common sense or ethics.  Not a great look.

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1 hour ago, Jadesamson12 said:

When kenny goes quiet on me he's been doing this or a little while now. like one time i asked him how is he then nothing until a very long time.

How often do you date Kenny in person?

If you have a crush on Nick And choose to flirt, text etc., that is a conscious choice.

It indicates you want Nick's attention and aren't that happy with or respectful of Kenny.

It's 8 mos. since you are dating Kenny, so why keep texting and flirting with Nick?

Edited by Wiseman2
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Kenny doesn’t sound like a great boyfriend. How often do you see him in person or have you ever met each other? 

I think you’re actually hurt and latching onto someone else’s boyfriend because you want what they have. Unfortunately you’re just hurting yourself now twice as much because 1) you still have a crappy boyfriend (nothing’s changed) and 2) you now deal with guilt thinking you have feelings for your friend.

No, it’s not a “natural thing” to flirt with your guy friend. Is that what he’s telling you? He’s just as much a crappy boyfriend as your bf because he continues flirting with women like you while being in a relationship with someone else. 

Raise your standards please. Both men sound deplorable.

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It's no long a friendship if feeling are involved. He rejected you, but continues to give you breadcrumbs...this is unhealthy for you. You need to drop him, lose his number and spend your energy on making new friends, and meeting a nice guy. 

If you don't stop this now, you will find yourself at 30 years old wondering why you wasted so much time hoping for this guy. 

Edited by smackie9
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There is nothing to do. He has a girlfriend. And you have a boyfriend no matter how he treats you or not. Furthermore, its downright concerning that you even have thoughts about that or even both flirting with each other. Shows bad character on both of you. 

Break up with the boyfriend, you dont like him. As far as best friend, leave it alone and pursue single guys that acually want to date you. Even as a friend, its debatable how good friends both of you are. When romantic emotions get involved that usually means there is no friendship there. Plus, again, you both are taken and dont even think how it affects your SOs. Even his concern is about your so called friendship and not his girlfriend lol. Its just a really bad choice to date somebody like that.

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14 hours ago, Jadesamson12 said:

He loves me but just as a best friend & nothing more. He doesn't want our friendship to end & I understand that.

Also every time we chat to each other it always turns into flirting - but when he flirts with me I get worried in case his gf sees yes I know they don't live together but still he does see her & i'm nervous that she'll one day take his phone & read the messages me & him have been sending.

- would you be happy if you were the one with him and learned he's been flirting with another gal? -- wait, you are already doing this to YOUR own BF.  😕 

I don't feel either of you should be in the relationships you're in now. - there is no respect.

IF you are not happy with the one you've got, get out of it.  Don't flirt around with some guy you've got the hots for.

Also, may be best you back away totally from this 'friendship' with him so he can focus on his own relationship he;s got with another woman... respect... as ti sounds like the temptation is too much.

 

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