Jump to content

Did I Overreact Here? She has a crush on my brother?


Recommended Posts

Posted (edited)

Met my crush from high school (from 15 years ago) on facebook a few days ago...

We started texting again...

 

Me and my brother went to the cinema yesterday to see the new Dr Strange movie...
By coincidence she was there too with friends...

 

Today during texting I told her the tall guy in front of me was my younger brother... (he is only 15 and 186cm tall lol)...

She then replies "Wow your brother is very different... handsome and tall..." meanwhile making no comments about my own appearance.

This made me a bit jealous...

 

She even asked me twice if I told him anything about her... 😞

 

So... my crush has a crush on my brother?!

 


 

 

Edited by KlearKut
Link to comment
Share on other sites

So, assuming you guys were in high school 15 years ago, she is at least 30? Having a crush at your 15 year old brother? Pretty sure that is weird and there is a law forbidding that relationship lol

Could be just a physical thing. Girls love tall guys. Makes the feel secure. But still just weird. 

Also how is "Dr Strange 2"? Heard not so good stuff about it lol

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Posted (edited)
7 minutes ago, Kwothe28 said:

So, assuming you guys were in high school 15 years ago, she is at least 30? Having a crush at your 15 year old brother? Pretty sure that is weird and there is a law forbidding that relationship lol

Could be just a physical thing. Girls love tall guys. Makes the feel secure. But still just weird. 

Also how is "Dr Strange 2"? Heard not so good stuff about it lol

We are both 27.

About the movie... sincerely I felt it was a bit lame. Perhaps I had too high of an expectation on it lol.

Edited by KlearKut
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

After a few days of communicating with her, she's already upsetting you. The people you once knew can be far different as adults. I've cut off people from my teen years from social media, as I really don't like who they've become. Time for you to do the same. There's something mentally wrong with an adult who is overly interested in a teen in this sort of situation.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Posted (edited)

What hurts me more is that she was the first girl I ever loved in my life.

I still love her deeply... And I mean not just simple infatuation or sexual desire...

True, everlasting, love.

 

This felt like a stab to the heart... 

Edited by KlearKut
Link to comment
Share on other sites

13 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Run. This is a backhanded insult. So you're "ugly and short", by her definition?

Felt like she was trying to imply that... But then again it could be my low self-esteem talking. Because I dated other girls more attractive than her... I know I am an attractive guy.

Her remarks about my brother still hurt though.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

When you're not happy in your present, you often look to the past to find it there. It's a faulty idea. If you're carrying a torch for someone you had a crush on 15 years ago, it sounds like you have some work to do at making your present day life more fulfilling.

If you're having a dry spell meeting single women your age, try meet up.com. Begin a new hobby where women your age are abundant. Dance lessons, co-ed sports teams, volunteering with environmental clean-ups. 

I'm having a hard time knowing how you can have a lifetime love for someone you never even dated. Infatuation, which is not love, usually fades with absence. What's been your longest romance? If you're unsuccessful in the dating world, why do you think that is?

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

24 minutes ago, KlearKut said:

Felt like she was trying to imply that... But then again it could be my low self-esteem talking. Because I dated other girls more attractive than her... I know I am an attractive guy.

Her remarks about my brother still hurt though.

It sounds like it. Try engaging more in things that matter to you (examples provided by Andrina's post above). Avoid superficial individuals in general.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Um, why are you jealous of your kid, and I mean kid, brother.  She could have been just trying to be polite.

"Because I dated other girls more attractive than her... I know I am an attractive guy."  Um, ew.  This makes you sound super insecure.

You are 27...why do you need to fish for compliments if you know you are an "attractive guy"?

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

There is a whole lot to unpack here.

  1. She is expressly overly interested in your brother, and as a minor I would be very concerned about her intentions towards him (or anyone underage).
  2. She seems very indifferent towards you, and very willing to express that.

Would you want to get involved with a woman who will being eyeing up your brother? I can't say that I would be comfortable inviting a creep into my life. Big Red flag.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well, first of all, you hadn't talked to this girl for 15 years, since you were a child. You say you love her, really? How can you love someone you haven't talked to in 15 years? Sure, you may feel fondly about what you felt for her in childhood but it's been so long that you don't even really know her now.

Secondly, yes you are talking to her but you haven't been on any dates or said you're into each other, right? Do you know if she's actually into you or she was just happy to chat to an old friend from childhood? I think you've made assumptions that something is going on between you. Maybe there isn't anything going on. If you're interested in her I think you need to ask her out. If you're just chatting as friends then she doesn't really owe you anything. She's allowed to check out other guys or date other guys because she's not your girlfriend.

Having said that, your brother is only fifteen so I think it's worrying she's perving on someone under age and so much younger than her. Although it may have just been a throw away comment and maybe she's not even into him.

In any case, I wouldn't worry about your brother because he's really young compared to her and under-age so I think he's not a threat to you. But I think you need to stop speculating and just tell this girl you like her and ask her out.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 hours ago, KlearKut said:

Felt like she was trying to imply that... But then again it could be my low self-esteem talking. Because I dated other girls more attractive than her... I know I am an attractive guy.

Her remarks about my brother still hurt though.

Well you're probably attractive but not everyone is into everyone. You seem to have just assumed that she HAS to be into you just because you had a crush on her as a child. I think this is a bit of a warped way of thinking. She doesn't actually owe you anything. Jealousy is a natural emotion so yeah you felt jealous that she seemingly checked out your brother. But I think your expectations are too high, you haven't seen this girl for a very long time. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If she is 27 and has a crush on your 15-year-old brother, there is something wrong with her. 

14 hours ago, KlearKut said:

I still love her deeply... And I mean not just simple infatuation or sexual desire...

True, everlasting, love.

Kindly, this woman is not the love of your life. You are confusing having a crush for love. I don't doubt you were hopeful and saw some potential in her, and you are infatuated with her, but you have apparently never dated her and are getting ahead of yourself. You set your expectations too high for this rekindled connection, rather than remembering that it's been years since you last spoke. Try to maintain some perspective in these situations, or you're going to wind up a lot more disappointed and hurt than necessary. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I see it as she just found him attractive...

As for your past- like 15 years ago.  Neither of you are the same as you were back then.  That's long gone- so how you saw her then is not how she is nowadays.

Nothing wrong with someone admitting they find some guy cute!  I suggest you do not read too much into anything - nor should you expect much.  Okay, so you had a thing for her back then.  That's done, all done!

If you can't accept her now as just a 'friend' then maybe move on and leave all alone.

 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...