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Is she actually interested in me


John20
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I met this girl in a pub on saint Patrick’s day we hit it off that night kissing dancing and chatting for the whole night. We exchanged details and I started texting her. Energy was matched no one word answers from her. 
 

we went on a date to a bowling alley and then drove around in my car for around three hours. When we would be walking together she would bump my arm with her Elboww and walk very close to me.  When I dropped her home she text immediately a funny story that happened when she got home. The date went well I thought conversation flowed no awkward silences. Kissed at the end for about a minute I also paid for everything even tho she offered to pay. 
 

i said I enjoyed the date and would wanna meet her again to which she said “ya it was so fun and we should!” 
 

I’ve since asked to meet again. Currently where I am we get two weeks off from college during Easter holidays. She said she is going to the coast with her family for one week. I said what about before that she said she’s busy. We still text and the energy is still good. She did say she would let me know if her schedule frees up. I understand she wants to use the other week to meet friends and has work. Just sucks as I won’t see her for three weeks. 
 

don’t know how important this part is but she’s very tall for a woman at 5’11 and I’m 6’6 so maybe that helps as well as to her being interested in me.

so basically I’m just curious is she actually interested or slowly gonna ghost me  

Edited by John20
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Nobody has a crystal ball to tell you this, but let the ball stay in her court. You asked twice and she said no. Don't bring up another date. You've put in your effort. Don't always be the first to text. Let her send some of the initial communication, and if she doesn't, you don't. This is the only way to gauge a mutual interest.

I hope things work out since you really like her. Whether or not you're dating someone, always keep up with doing things with friends and your hobbies/interests. People who have interesting lives besides having a partner make them so much more attractive as dating material. She's obviously got a fulfilling life besides dating, and so should you. Get going on your own plans for break, and if you happen to meet another wonderful woman during this time, don't think of yourself as taken, because you're not. Good luck, and keep us updated.

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21 minutes ago, Andrina said:

Nobody has a crystal ball to tell you this, but let the ball stay in her court. You asked twice and she said no. Don't bring up another date. You've put in your effort. Don't always be the first to text. Let her send some of the initial communication, and if she doesn't, you don't. This is the only way to gauge a mutual interest.

I hope things work out since you really like her. Whether or not you're dating someone, always keep up with doing things with friends and your hobbies/interests. People who have interesting lives besides having a partner make them so much more attractive as dating material. She's obviously got a fulfilling life besides dating, and so should you. Get going on your own plans for break, and if you happen to meet another wonderful woman during this time, don't think of yourself as taken, because you're not. Good luck, and keep us updated.

Thanks for the advice Andrina. I made sure not to be too eager and I still do my own things. I’ll keep in mind what you said and let her organise the next date. 

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Not everyone places a lot of importance on time spent in person and there are individuals who are happy chatting and texting.

If she were interested she’d have countered with an alternative plan to seeing you or given you more info on when she’d be free next. She seems lukewarm at best and overly chatty over text which I don’t place much importance on. 

See whether she does get back to you after she’s back but I automatically wouldn’t think highly of someone who doesn’t value my time or let me know there’s strong interest to meet again. I simply do not respond anymore or lose interest in texting or having any other conversations. 

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I think people can often get caught up with things over the holiday season and as you've just had one date you are not a massive priority even though she does seem to like you. 

If I were you I wouldn't put as much effort into the texting. Let her initiate it. Don't be so quick to reply. It seems silly to invest so much time and energy into someone non-committal about meeting again. Leave it to her to try to keep in touch and suggest a date in the future after the holidays. And keep your options open. 

And Rose Mosse is right. Texts are pretty meaningless. All it really means is she enjoys talking to you and probably the attention as well. And for all you know she is texting multiple guys at the same time. 

Edited by jazz_lover
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1 hour ago, John20 said:

so basically I’m just curious is she actually interested or slowly gonna ghost me  

You never know that. Its certanly not positive that she turned off your date offer and didnt offer alternative. It could be lots of stuff. From her being just busy now, to her weighting her options or just not liking you enough. Lots of times people just "fizzle out" expecting you to take the hint, instead of being honest. To you it was a nice date. To her? Who knows? They always say how it was fun and how you should do it again. 

Her messaging means she likes you being there. However, that doesnt mean anything in terms of dating. She maybe just likes attention and to have somebody there. So, dont relly on that also.

Anyway, lower your expectations considerably. If it happens, it happens. But, as you wont see her for almost a month(if she agrees to see you again), you have no obligations toward that girl. So, just relax and enjoy your life. If she wants to see you and makes herself available later, good. If she doesnt, no big deal. You did offer next step. Its up to her if she wants that or not. Dont let yourself get stuck on somebody who wont see you again and gives "I am busy" excuses.

Edited by Kwothe28
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2 hours ago, Rose Mosse said:

f she were interested she’d have countered with an alternative plan to seeing you or given you more info on when she’d be free next. She seems lukewarm at best and overly chatty over text which I don’t place much importance on. 

See whether she does get back to you after she’s back but I automatically wouldn’t think highly of someone who doesn’t value my time or let me know there’s strong interest to meet again. I simply do not respond anymore or lose interest in texting or having any other conversations. 

I feel the same, I agree.

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