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Should I confess feelings to a coworker?


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So I (23 F) have a crush on a coworker (25 M). We're both college students and managers at a fast food place. We text and we've spent some time together outside of work, but only in a group unless we're decompressing after getting off work at the same time. 

 

We definitely flirt a lot, but then he also makes flirtatious jokes with the guys at work that he's friends with, and he makes fun of me a lot, too, and so sometimes I wonder if he just thinks of me as being more like them. He's told me his ideal relationship would be with a friend, but that he feels like he has a hard time distinguishing between flirting and just being friendly. 

 

Recently we were talking while closing the store and he said that he thinks he's pretty good at telling how people feel, but that he won't act on it unless they say something first. He's also said that I'm really bad at picking up on others' feelings and intentions. 

 

I have a really good memory and I tease him pretty often about being forgetful. He told me he only bothers remembering stuff about people he cares about. Later on he made a joke about my cat and used his name. That same day we were talking about love languages and he remembered mine from a conversation we had months ago that I didn't even remember having until he brought it back up. 

 

I catch him looking at me a lot, and sometimes he has this expression. I don't even know how to describe it, except that it reminds me of movies. But I also feel like I could just be projecting when that happens. I guess I'm asking if it seems like he might like me back and if I should tell him how I feel. If nothing else at least then I'd have it off my chest...

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No I would not "confess feelings" -how about asking him out on a date you plan in advance? Is dating allowed at your workplace? When I was around your age I thought one of my coworkers had a crush on me -he was very flirty and a year younger than me.  I asked him to lunch.  Once we were outside the office it was clear he'd been flirting because that was the kind of person he was -he liked the group attention.  It was a very awkward lunch and it was clear he wasn't interested in dating me.  I'm glad I asked though because then I just moved on.

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Personally I would say don’t do it as you both work at the same place and location. If it was a situation where you worked in a huge building and were in separate departments, then that’s different. Should things not work out, then you’ll have the pain of still seeing each other every day. In other words don’t poop where you eat. 

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7 hours ago, Batya33 said:

No I would not "confess feelings" -how about asking him out on a date you plan in advance?

That's a great idea. I agree. And if you feel things aren't mutual, or maybe you are not as attracted to him as you thought... No big deal. Go back to working together as usual.

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12 hours ago, UnrealJellybean said:

I guess I'm asking if it seems like he might like me back and if I should tell him how I feel.

Do not "confess" anything. That will make work very awkward and make him uncomfortable. See if he is willing to have coffee. perhaps find out if he has a GF.

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He’s teasing you and doesn’t sound interested. Why would you bother wasting your time playing guessing games with a man who flirts with you and doesn’t ask you out? I’m not sure how you’re paying any attention to him or have the bandwidth for this. 

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If he's interested he would ask you out...and he's had plenty of opportunity to do it. People just goof around at work...it's workplace bonding which can involve teasing and flirting. 

I would only invest in confident guys anyways or ones that have enough nustsack to ask you out. 

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